One very fine day during Chol Hamoed Sukkot, when MMM was a teeny tiny newborn; yours truly, overly excited by becoming an aunt yet again, went shopping. Remembering the copious salivating three months before at Daffy’s upon discovering that these fine retailers carry Absorba and Vitamins, my feet automatically carried me four blocks in that direction.
I was extremely successful – both in acquiring outfits in record time and preventing myself from buying half the store. So, off to the cashiers I trotted. Right in front of me there was an Israeli lady; and when it was her turn, she decided to inquire from the saleslady and the neighboring manager as to the absence of a Jewish child from the humongous billboards hanging right above the cash registers – the said billboards containing the prerequisite black, “Latino”, “Asian/Pacific Islander”, and a token “white” child (at least two of those were “females”). I just burst out laughing – I enjoyed this so much! She was asking two women whose male relatives, I can bet my last savings, were participating in the Crown Heights riots back in 91!
Upon exiting that fine establishment I was stopped at the traffic light by yells and screams – what the heck? At first I could only hear “Stay down! Stay down” from somewhere in the middle of a hefty throng of people. Before the light changed, the picture became crystal clear. Remember our senile Mayor’s idiotic decision of closing the car traffic at the busiest part of Broadway and making it a pedestrian only zone, completed with tables, chairs, and umbrellas? Well, one of those idiotic umbrellas was knocked down by a strong gust of October wind, in the process knocking off a pedestrian as well. At first, the poor woman was just trying to get up (and probably just shake off the whole sorry episode), but, given the overpopulation of ambulance chasers and the attached mentality, people were suggesting to her to stay down. As I was crossing, I saw a police car approaching to investigate: here goes few million out of busted city treasury! Car drivers, watch out for "brownies"!
Monday, November 23, 2009
Friday, November 20, 2009
HAPPY WHATEVER!
Or What Are We Celebrating Again?
You always know far in advance when any holiday, even a “minor one”, is coming: there are sales coming up! Then you get the grumbles if your office is open, and few office weasels who would try and get off regardless; after that, UPS and FedEx would call up to make sure you are open; and, finally, on the day itself, you just wake up, perform your auto-pilot morning routine, and then wonder for a few minutes as to why the subway is so pleasantly empty from the yelling and spitting little and medium-sized animals, uh, I mean inner city school kids. AND then the forbidden invention of Thomas Edison goes on in your head: it’s Veteran’s Day!
This year Veteran’s Day celebrations were especially lively, due, of course, to the reign of our illustrious Chairman, erm, President. The terrorist attack at Ft. Hood, I mean “man-made disaster”, I mean “alleged man-made disaster”, as we can not jump to conclusions so prematurely. The Sun King, I mean, Barak Hussein (Sun King should please forgive me for such insult to his memory), and his lady fair could not find time in their extremely busy schedules to visit till the actual Memorial Service, at which point they presented a wonderful pictures of grief; plus, Partei Genosse, I mean, the President, delivered a very appropriate and almost fantastic speech. Meanwhile, George and Laura Bush paid a visit to Ft. Hood right away – but did it quietly (and without cameras).
The saddest conclusion of Ft. Hood massacre, aside, of course, from horrible loss of life, was the horrific picture of our almost total vulnerability due to the cancerous miasma of so-called multiculturalism and political correctness – especially when it comes to the practitioners of the religion of peace.
Fast-forward to the day itself. Of course, our office was open – our company is pretty stingy with time off. I actually remembered what day it was, and was extremely happy that my dawdling did not go all wrong, and I got my “Home of the free because of the brave” T-shirt before lunch.
Lunch time; your truly is in the elevator together with a usual assortment of representatives of other offices. There were two ladies from a French company who kept yammering about what the heck today is, and why there were no e-mails from France, and why nobody is calling today, and why there is no mail, and then came the masterpiece! “Today is an Armistice anniversary, right?” “Right.” “So, wait, Americans are celebrating our holiday?” “Who knows?” Meanwhile, there was a whole bunch of other people in that elevator, who, judging by their looks, could not care less what we are celebrating and how; only that they were forced to work when the mail and banks are closed. I just could not listen to this idiocy, never mind travesty, and probably had a murderous expression on my mug. Finally, when we were approaching the lobby, and the American employee could not clarify to her French colleague as to the Veterans of which war are we saluting exactly, I exploded and barked “all of them”; nearly adding “ungrateful ignoramuses, all of you!”
And then I left the building and saw few people with flags who were obviously just leaving the parade; and then I saw the soldiers themselves. I dearly wanted to approach them and just shake their hands and thank them – but my idiotic shyness stopped me. I hope some of them saw my T-shirt.
So, belated, but most sincere, cyber salute to all of you, Ladies and Gentlemen, Veterans of all the wars defending ours and other ungrateful jerks’ freedom! From one (but not lonely in this) very grateful and appreciative of her freedom American! May Heavenly Father watch other you and your families and grant you the victory over all our enemies, foreign and domestic!
You always know far in advance when any holiday, even a “minor one”, is coming: there are sales coming up! Then you get the grumbles if your office is open, and few office weasels who would try and get off regardless; after that, UPS and FedEx would call up to make sure you are open; and, finally, on the day itself, you just wake up, perform your auto-pilot morning routine, and then wonder for a few minutes as to why the subway is so pleasantly empty from the yelling and spitting little and medium-sized animals, uh, I mean inner city school kids. AND then the forbidden invention of Thomas Edison goes on in your head: it’s Veteran’s Day!
This year Veteran’s Day celebrations were especially lively, due, of course, to the reign of our illustrious Chairman, erm, President. The terrorist attack at Ft. Hood, I mean “man-made disaster”, I mean “alleged man-made disaster”, as we can not jump to conclusions so prematurely. The Sun King, I mean, Barak Hussein (Sun King should please forgive me for such insult to his memory), and his lady fair could not find time in their extremely busy schedules to visit till the actual Memorial Service, at which point they presented a wonderful pictures of grief; plus, Partei Genosse, I mean, the President, delivered a very appropriate and almost fantastic speech. Meanwhile, George and Laura Bush paid a visit to Ft. Hood right away – but did it quietly (and without cameras).
The saddest conclusion of Ft. Hood massacre, aside, of course, from horrible loss of life, was the horrific picture of our almost total vulnerability due to the cancerous miasma of so-called multiculturalism and political correctness – especially when it comes to the practitioners of the religion of peace.
Fast-forward to the day itself. Of course, our office was open – our company is pretty stingy with time off. I actually remembered what day it was, and was extremely happy that my dawdling did not go all wrong, and I got my “Home of the free because of the brave” T-shirt before lunch.
Lunch time; your truly is in the elevator together with a usual assortment of representatives of other offices. There were two ladies from a French company who kept yammering about what the heck today is, and why there were no e-mails from France, and why nobody is calling today, and why there is no mail, and then came the masterpiece! “Today is an Armistice anniversary, right?” “Right.” “So, wait, Americans are celebrating our holiday?” “Who knows?” Meanwhile, there was a whole bunch of other people in that elevator, who, judging by their looks, could not care less what we are celebrating and how; only that they were forced to work when the mail and banks are closed. I just could not listen to this idiocy, never mind travesty, and probably had a murderous expression on my mug. Finally, when we were approaching the lobby, and the American employee could not clarify to her French colleague as to the Veterans of which war are we saluting exactly, I exploded and barked “all of them”; nearly adding “ungrateful ignoramuses, all of you!”
And then I left the building and saw few people with flags who were obviously just leaving the parade; and then I saw the soldiers themselves. I dearly wanted to approach them and just shake their hands and thank them – but my idiotic shyness stopped me. I hope some of them saw my T-shirt.
So, belated, but most sincere, cyber salute to all of you, Ladies and Gentlemen, Veterans of all the wars defending ours and other ungrateful jerks’ freedom! From one (but not lonely in this) very grateful and appreciative of her freedom American! May Heavenly Father watch other you and your families and grant you the victory over all our enemies, foreign and domestic!
Friday, November 06, 2009
Reagan at Brandenburg Gate - "tear down this wall"
In honor of the 20th anniversary of the fall of this wall (which our esteemed so-called President will not be attending). We need somebody channeling Reagan - now more than ever...
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
HEART-WARMING
This short story took place one fine evening few months ago.
During the elaborate ceremony otherwise known as Mini Beloved Sibling’s Preparations For The Night we were watching a clip of Barney’s show in Radio City. They were singing something about loving special people in our lives; in the middle of this MBS turned to me with the sweetest smile on her face and told me in no uncertain terms “You are special, Papi!”
Later in the night, while I was decompressing in my humble abode, Beloved Sibling informed me via telephone conversation that Mini Not Me, who sometimes speaks during sleep, was mumbling something about “pak” and other enjoyable things; and in the middle of this slumber monologue he very clearly said “Papi”.
To use the old overused expression, my cup have truly runneth over.
During the elaborate ceremony otherwise known as Mini Beloved Sibling’s Preparations For The Night we were watching a clip of Barney’s show in Radio City. They were singing something about loving special people in our lives; in the middle of this MBS turned to me with the sweetest smile on her face and told me in no uncertain terms “You are special, Papi!”
Later in the night, while I was decompressing in my humble abode, Beloved Sibling informed me via telephone conversation that Mini Not Me, who sometimes speaks during sleep, was mumbling something about “pak” and other enjoyable things; and in the middle of this slumber monologue he very clearly said “Papi”.
To use the old overused expression, my cup have truly runneth over.
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