MORNING UPDATE, June 1, 2015

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! Happy first day of June! It's cloudy and rainy outside, but no humidity, so I am happy. George and Sniff developed a taste for minced dinners, which were previously ignored in favor of cubed ones.

Archbishop Tutu writes religious books for kids about love and peace - here is another definition of chutzpah for you. 

Crazy upstairs is strangely silent.

Currently trending at #5 are sandals for women - considering what else is trending, this should be the top spot (or maybe I just love sandals that much).
"Bruce Jenner Reveals Caitlin on Vanity Fair Cover" - good luck to both of their kids! Actually, never mind.
Speaking of which - Kim Kardashian is pregnant. That kid definitely needs all the luck he or she can get.
"Dress like Jane Fonda" - another lesson on how to be a traitor to the best country in the world and profit hugely from it.
"Paltrow's new competition" - "Apparently, being an actress, model, or reality TV star isn’t enough for some stars, and in the past couple of years several well known celebrities have diversified their career offerings towards advising you and I how to best live our lives." Basically, from "do not disturb the disturbed" category.
"Eco-conscious entertainers hoping to take the lead on water conservation talk proudly of their drought-friendly gardens." - give them all a  Presidential Medal of Honor!
"TSA agents fail 67 out of 70 security tests" - we should all feel sooo safe right about now.

And, finally, "The Royals Are Adorable Tourists" - they are just adorable.

Coffee this morning in my Harry Potter mug, new edition.

MORNING UPDATE, June 2, 2015

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! It's still rainy and cold outside - yes!! Today cats decided that minced tuna is not such fun after all, but relented in the end.

Here is another extremely talented guy who recently came up with a collection of poetry for kids - Nick Cannon!

Currently trending at #1 is Goldie Hawn - because she came up with the explanation of why she never married Kurt Russel. According to her, "a lasting relationship isn't about marriage". What can I tell you - it's always amusing to see when guys come up with explanations of why they never marry the love of their lives, but now I see that's it's doubly amusing to see a woman do the same.
Trending at #2 is Robert Downey Jr. - because he apparently needs his own furniture when he travels to movie locations. Interesting quirk, but very mild by Hollywood standards - especially if he pays the shipping costs.
"The complex Jenner-Kardashian relationship" - there are mental health professionals to untangle the "complexity".
"2015 hurricane season: What to expect" - um, hurricanes?
"How healthy is your bread?" - it's bread, you spoiled brats! Eat and enjoy!
"Broken leg won't sideline Kerry from Iran talks" - how courageous of him!
"4 Reasons You Shouldn't Buy A Diamond Ring" - ladies, have at them!

And, finally, "Chelsea Clinton’s Daughter May Own the Last Dress Oscar de la Renta Ever Made" - yea, this family is one of the working class, man, no denial about it.

Coffee this morning in my blue wine glass.

MORNING UPDATE, June 8, 2015

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! The weather is a bit strange, but breathable - and that's all I am asking of it, honestly! Cats demolished another can of tuna, had another fight, and are now sunning themselves.

The crazy upstairs is silent.

Currently trending at #9 are Father's Day gift - why not at #1?
"Starbucks celebrates Frappuccino's 20th birthday" - I officially feel old.
"How Beyoncé maintains her 'bootylicious' body" - aside from usual nonsense about diet and exercise offered to women this time, why is nobody offended by the word "bootylicious" itself?
"Personal side of Clinton" - here is a topic for a horror movie.
"Improved sales of whole-milk yogurts suggest a growing preference for minimally processed dairy products, experts say" - wow! My opinion is vindicated - again!
"Most underrated honeymoon destination" - as it's in Turkey, I sort of see why it's "underrated".
"Christie would crack down on pot as President" - great platform, Governor! You got my vote only under extreme duress!
"J. Lo. ditches 'nude' for new" - is it her attempt to counteract "my ass was too hot for Morocco" statement?
"Ariana Grande's Necessary Call For Feminism and Sisterhood" - predictably, she quotes Gloria Steinem, but mentions nothing about women being able to defend themselves.

"$20 bottled water is so popular it's sold out" - world never runs out of suckers.

Coffee this morning in my US Virgin Islands mug, aka "get a grip".

MORNING UPDATE, June 19, 2015

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! The weather is getting summer-y - and I would dearly love to kick everyone who was complaining about the cold two weeks ago. George decided that he likes pate after all - and Sniff decided to listen to the old coot.

For reasons unknown I have been listening to the Conquest of Paradise - a lot, and also contemplating on the Journey of Columbus.

Yesterday was the anniversary of the battle of Waterloo - here is another tyrant who was supposedly brought down by Russians.

Crazy upstairs decided to have extra fun and to perform her routine after nine p.m. EST.

Currently trending at #3 is Kate Mckinnon - because she, together with Melissa McCarthy (trending at #10), and Kristen Wiig (not trending), are filming "femme-powered Ghostbusters reboot'. Here is to female empowerment! We need more women to fight ghosts - or something.
Jerry Hall just jumped to #1 - for reasons completely unknown.
"7 shortcuts to a chick, sophisticated home" - oh, please. All you need is money.
"Feast your eyes on street food around the world" - all I can think of is "how sanitary was the prep process?"
"Russia willing to consider financial aid for Greece" - let's raise our glasses to the theater of the absurd!
"The Unexpected Beauty Product You Can Find at Starbucks" - their napkins "work great as blotting papers"! How poor are we getting already?!!
Naomi Campbell still fits into her dress from 1998 - and I still fit into my swimsuit from 2008. So, what's the big deal?

And, finally, Mary Claire UK did a whole spread on Kate's jewelry - you can find what her faves are, who designed them, what kind of stones went into it, and, most importantly, can you afford it or not.

Coffee this morning in the disposable cup from the bagel place next to the blissfully almost-quiet laundromat.