HISTORIC ELECTIONS

These elections were definitely historic; not in the sense the prostitutes from the media would like us to see, but historic none the less.

Some time ago my sis, in the best traditions of sisters and best friends, chided me for my excessive use of the word "stupid". In her opinion, considering my vocabulary, I should spice up my speech a bit. Agreed; but sometimes, especially when you are in a grip of a strong emotion, simple words are the best, so, dear readers, gird yourselves: you will see a lot of "stupids" in this composition. Another memory, also involving my sister, has something to do with our trip to London. Like any decent tourists, we went on the double-decker tour on our first day. Our over hyper guide kept repeating the same phrase over and other again "Princess Diana: gone, but not forgotten"; at the certain point of the tour, everyone starter finishing the darn phrase for him. After all, it was 1999, and her death was still fresh in everyone's memory; although, come to think of it, they still can't let the poor disturbed woman rest in peace. Anyway, I will impersonate this guide here by repeating, over and over again, "thanks, media". OK, introductions are over; let's begin.

First of all, we have seen the historic display of stupidity that was displayed by the American electorate. Nothing else would explain why we are now saddled with a President-elect whom Eric Rush very eloquently called "one of the greatest purveyors of male bovine fecal matter in human history". It is just very sad to realize that in our age of computers, Internet, cell phones, satellites, billions of bits of information and their lightning quick dissemination, the majority of the people who showed up by the polls have voted for a pathological liar. Oh, yea, and thank you, media!

I mean, it really boggles the mind: a lawyer who went to school solely due to affirmative actions and support from America-haters, a guy who had spend 143 days in the Senate, has no real life or political experience to recommend him, refused to produce his birth certificate to prove his citizenship, has consistent and uninterrupted history of associating with racists, anti-Semites, black supremacists, socialists, Marxists, domestic and international terrorists and their sympathizers, consistently voted along the liberal left lines, expressed the desire for diplomacy with the world's most vicious dictators, and, along with his beautiful wife, expressed open contempt for this country! And this monstrosity is presented to us as a half-deity, a new messiah, a unifier of the nation, an end to all of America's woes, a lover of the "little guy", and a new dawn for the country! Thank you, media, for creating this bizarrely surreal image! And my deep, everlasting gratitude to every single stupid moron of a registered voter who cast a ballot for this nightmarish chimera!

Let's see: 96% of black votes went to him, but that is not racist at all, no siree bob. More than 70% of single women without children voted for this sex symbol as well; girls, with all due respect, and even though I belong to this particular electoral group, this is going to be a first time in my life when I will side with the opposition (judgmental harpies) and tell you these two things: no wonder you are single, and there is no need to perpetuate your genetic pool. Majority of Hispanic votes went to this dude as well: no comment (or rather, a separate entry). All together, majority of women voted for this one, as long as some white men. In my not humble opinion, anyone who is "white" or makes anything slightly above the minimum wage, and who had voted for this demigod, was simply performing an exercise in masochism. Ladies and gents, why did you not just come out and said so? I am sure you would have been provided with leather, restrains, whips, chains, and whatever else you require by the other part of the electorate (I personally would have volunteered my last dollars towards this worthy endeavor); I mean, we are all adults here, so why so sheepish all of the sudden? Believe me, we would rather you perform your rituals on yourselves, and not confide us to what looks like four years of hell in the bargain.

Looking at the myriad of absolutely delirious with happiness faces that were celebrating Obama's victory, I could not help but wonder: OK, the case with white morons I just explained; but what about the black morons? If America is such horrible country, which began with slavery and continuously exercised the politics of racial inequality, than what force on earth prevented the blacks, beginning with approximately 1865, from following the path of the young couple from the infamous novel by Harriet Beecher Stowe? In case you are unfamiliar with this literary masterpiece, I will explain: what exactly holds the blacks here, in the US, and prevents them from expatriating to their beloved Africa, the cradle of life? The answer is very simple, and if it does not stare you straight in the face, again, very not humbly, I cannot help you.

The dust is beginning to settle, so to speak, but the carnival of idiocy is hardly over; in depth commentary, from both sides, of what went wrong for the Republicans. Here is my uneducated and not humble opinion. One: you cannot fight a pool of crocodiles, jackals, and sharks using Queensbury rules of engagement; period. That was the main mistake of the Busch presidency and the McCain's campaign. Two: thank you, media! It is pretty hard to fight a constant campaign of deliberate misinformation waged by every single major network, newspaper, and Internet venue, while armed with only Fox News, independent Internet news venues, and a bunch of dedicated bloggers. Three: our rotten education system, long ago taken over by aging and young hippies, including former "weathermen", which, of course, explains the overwhelming support of under thirty voters for the new messiah. Four: the stock market crash, which was, of course, Clinton's mess, but, thanks to number two and three, ended up being, of course, Busch's, and, by default, all Republicans' fault (I am sure Clintons and their cronies are laughing themselves silly right now). Five: two unpopular wars, in case of which I would like to ask: should the members of the religion of peace hijack another few plains and fly them into the Sears Tower, John Hancock Building, The Empire State Building, and the Space Needle, for a good measure, for these wars to become popular again?

This, by the way, brings to my mind a little scene from a book I read in my lonely childhood about the Spartacus rebellion. The scene goes like this: a bunch of drunken patricians, quickly becoming more and more intoxicated, were raining different curses on the government. They were getting more and more inventive, and finally, one of them yelled "Let the Jupiter incinerate our Senate!", to which another drunken young man quietly added: "just let him warn me in advance, so I should not come in that day". So, in case Osama (who, by the way, is probably getting drunk from joy right now in whatever cave he is hiding) is planning another terrorist action against us, I do not mind another plane (providing it will only contain Mohamed and Abdulla) flying into our Senate, as long as at that particular moment it will only house Pelosi, Reid, Boxer, Kucinich, Kennedy, Obama, and, most importantly, Murtha.

Speaking of Murtha, what in blazes happened to the population of the good state of Pennsylvania? One guy threatens to bankrupt their main source of revenue, and they elect him a President; another one insults them from here to eternity, and they re-elect him to Congress. Another exercise in masochism and stupidity.

And speaking of paradise on earth in general, and economy in particular; since when is it a goverment's job to provide us with jobs, free medical and dental care, education, houses, and chickens in every pot? Here is the definition of capitalist economy given by Walter Williams, who has a Ph.D. in the subject and teaches it in college: "economic system based on private ownership and control over of the means of production. Under laissez-faire capitalism, government activity is restricted to the protection of the individual's rights against fraud, theft and the initiation of physical force." Expanding on that, government’s role all together should be in protecting us from criminals inside, enemies from outside, and in protection of our individual rights and freedoms as guaranteed by the Constitution. Ha, ha, hearty har har with a cherry on top! According to the new crown prince of Kenya, who is now our President-elect, government is our new and better mommy, who is going to kiss our every bubu and take away all our worries.

So, now (at least, according to Yahoo and MSN), everyone is concerned with the new "first puppy", its potential breed, and the best names for it. Second on the least is Michelle Obama, with her elegant style and her plans for moving the family to the White House. Where is the spittoon when one needs it? Meanwhile, the one and only kisser of our bubus is creating a new cabinet full of former Clintonistas, promising the civilian trials for the suspected terrorists at Guantanamo, and, all of the sudden, reminding us that we should not expect immediate fixes and prepare ourselves for a long wait. All of this, while leaders of HAMAS were rushing in their official congratulations; they really wanted to be the first ones to congratulate him!

As to my people... Deep sigh. Can I just remind you, guys and gals, that turning the other cheek is not in our religious cannons? How blind, deaf, dumb, and stupid did we have to be to vote in such overwhelming majority for a guy whose friends are a bunch of anti-Semites and terrorist hacks? Moreover, a black liberal, supported by blacks and Hispanics, who both are biggest anti-Semitic groups in America today (right after Muslims, that is). The day before the elections some Jewish sounding dude posted an article on JWR, which started by posting a question: how come both Muslims and Jews support Obama in such overwhelming numbers? Well, one of them must be stupid, and his money was on the Jews. What a brilliant observation! For my part, allow me to add this: forget about the "mystical" connection we all have, or the fact that both our good and bad deeds have profound effect on the rest of us. Let us just look at the issue from "mundane" point of view. All of you are free, thinking (hopefully) human beings, endowed by our Creator with the freedom of choice, and the full right to stand by those choices. So, when you attend a congregation that is run by a spiritually corrupt leader, that is your choice and your problem. When you send your children (and subsequently pay the tuition) to the school that I would love to destroy, because I know for a fact that it destroys faith instead of instilling it, that is your choice and both your and my problem. But when you willingly and proudly voted for that bastard son of a whoremonger, in the process betraying this country, the Holy Land, and the best interests of our people, and then arrogantly declared your happiness with your choice, please do not expect me to either respect you or your choice, or to be quiet, for that matter.

For me, the outcome of these elections is a test of faith. I know that He heard our prayers and said "no"; I firmly believe that He will never forsake us or this country; but I am human and I can't help my overwhelming sadness and the feeling of defeat. Since the official announcement, I have run though a whole score of emotions. A former psych major in me recognized a certain pattern; finally I realized that the succession of emotions was that of grief. Not for President Busch, Senator McCain, or Governor Palin, even though I really feel for them on different levels, and wish them all the best. My feelings are for my country. My beautiful country, which gave me shelter, freedom, and a sense of my true purpose. My country was voluntary surrendered to the people who hate it! I can't sleep, or stop crying, and my blood pressure is up 14 points since last August. OK, deep breaths, Barbie, deep breaths.

One of the many things that I learned in my twenty years of living here is undying hope and unbeatable optimism. So, I will dry my tears and remind myself that surrender and defeat are never viable options. Yes, we suffered a tremendous blow. But we can always fight, even in small ways; always remember that He Alone ultimately knows the past, the present, and the future; and always hope for His Mercy and His Blessings.