MORNING UPDATE - November 7, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! It's chilly, but still nice outside. Both felines are providing us with an unending entertainment which also includes a robotic fish.
At work it's now that magical time when we, all being Harry Potter fans, have to impersonate him and his friends by magically stretching the shelves.
Meanwhile, the Jew-faces here, on the home front, used up all the hot water yet again.
The crazy upstairs is doing her usual stuff.
Currently trending at #1 is Valerie Bertinelli - who "Recounts The Day She Was Dissed by Christina Aguilera". I sincerely hope that she counted that as a blessing.
OK, correction: Hugh Hefner just climbed to #1 - because his son "Shares What It Was Like Growing Up in the Playboy Mansion". Ughhh and double Uhhhg!
Keira Knightley is at #9 - because she "Poses Topless to Protest Against Photoshop". What is it with naked and half-naked protesting?
"Cops called on nanny" - I guess one of my co-workers finally had enough.
"Khloe Kardashian Sends Lamar Odom Very Public Birthday Message" - classy, as usual.
"Best CMA Awards bodies" - OK, left-wingers, you have really gotten too far this time! Bodies because of innocent jokes?
"World's fastest golf cart" - an early Christmas present to comrade Hussein?
Rachel Bilson had a baby girl - the poor kid was named Briar Rose. But, hopefully, she won't be teased too much while growing up if you consider other celebrity baby names.
"How to wear red lipstick" - um, the same way you wear any other shade?
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - December 24

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! It's cold again, darn it!!! George demanded extra petting yesterday; this morning he just quietly ate and went back to sleep. Sniff is just sleeping - without breakfast.
The crazy upstairs is back.
A few days ago Baby Bro was debating as to which stamp to affix on the letter to the court clerks. His choices included either Disney or flowers, so he settled on the Bug's Life one.
Currently trending at #1 is Keira Knightley - because she "can't stop wearing all-in-ones with clumpy brown boots." Breaking news, what can I say. But she can wear all she wants as long as she does not play another Austen heroine again.
Trending at #2 is Kristen Stewart - because it looks like she and R-Patz are planning to spend the New Year together on the Isle of Wight. I was never there personally, but was told that's it's a romantic and picturesque spot.
Winter coats are trending at #8 - why not #1? Definitely more important than Keira.
According to the people in the know, there are 5 things about you on which strangers make instant judgments, and your footwear is #1. Well, you would be wrong about me, but have fun making assumptions.
"Sheen bashes Robertson" - that just makes me laugh.
"5 offbeat New Year's suggestions for singles" - I will be sleeping with one or both of my cats, thank you very much.
Selena claimed that "she needs time for herself" - please, take all the time you want! We are not complaining.
"Costliest mistakes you can make with your taxes" - the costliest being an enemy of the current regime.
"Interview: Jon M. Chu's Insights Into The World Of Justin Bieber" - sometimes I really feel bad for our youth.
And, finally, breaking: Kate is pregnant again! This time she and Will are hoping for a little girl. Let the second round of the circus begin!
Coffee this morning in my Aruba mug.

MORNING UPDATE - MAY 7

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! It's cloudy outside, but the sun is scheduled to come out. Sniffles slept in the cat house, which he did not do for a while. George, on the other hand, figured out a way to the top of the bookcase, from whence he kept declaring his dissatisfaction with the world. J. Lo is trending at # 7 because over the weekend her recording session in Florida was interrupted by gunshots - big deal! Isn't she from the Bronx? Should be used to it by now. Cameron Diaz made a splash with a "scary-looking" spiky belt - be happy the spikes did not resemble bullets; that would really get everyone in a twist. Keira Knightly's wedding dress was "recycled" - something she wore to a party back in 2008. Oh, for pete's sake! Aren't we all supposed to be all gaga and mushy about recycling? What gives?! A hockey fan asked his pizza to be delivered instead of the original pick up because his team tied playoff game, so he could not leave the house - oh, boy! Republican Senator Saxby Chambliss beat our dear Comrade Hussein at golf - yes!!! "Children exposed to guns at NRA convention" - oh, horror of horrors! Children exposed to homosexual perversion - rounded education, but to see a gun - call the social services! Miley Cyrus showed up in a "daring mesh dress" - I think it's time for her to hire a new stylist. Kim Kardashian showed at the same gala in a flowery dress with matching bag and shoes - poor pictures at the Met, to be subjected to all this. And Kate hired a "perfect housekeeper" in preparations for the baby - I wonder what constitutes perfect in this scenario. Coffee this morning would probably be in a disposable cup from a local DD.

MORNING UPDATE - MAY 5

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Sunday! Shavua Tov! The nice weather is holding - yay! George and Sniffles continue to hold their positions on the respective beds; also, George is not exited about his amazon box anymore. But he did try to answer the phone this morning - and dropped the dratted thing in the process. Daniel Radcliffe predicts that his next movie is going to be a hit - yea, because most of the still star-struck Potter fans are going to run and see it. Keira Knightley is trending at #6 because she got married - mazal tov, and please stay away from further Austen dramatizations. IRS is complaining that they are unable to collect all the taxes owed - start with your own staff, guys. Hummus is conquering America, thanks, of course, to an Israeli company - go, Jews! Miley Cyrus is very exited to be #1 on Maxim's hot list - a true accomplishment. Porsche unveiled a new car that can outrun a 747 on takeoff - I wonder how many men who never grew up are already lining up for that one. The cheapest tequila makes the best margarita - nice to know. Justin Bieber showed "sensitivity" to muslim women during his Dubai show by not performing his usual dance with a member of an audience - spare me. And, finally, Kate was blamed for the - are you ready for it? - the shrinking size of handbags! Coffee this morning in my blue wine glass from Target.