As always, a little belated, but also as always very sincere Happy Earth Day!
Congratulations, green people, tree huggers, environmentalists, and other sundry worshippers of Gaia! Another year of job well done!
There is only one little, almost miniscule little thingy that you forgot to accomplish amidst your tireless and devoted efforts towards giving nightmares to little children, expanding the number of malaria sufferers, robbing US taxpayers, preparing fresh lists of climate criminals, zipping back and forth on private jets for all your very important conferences, destroying lives and careers of scientists who oppose your noble efforts, plus making baby steps towards the destruction of Western economy, world hunger and depopulation of Earth. You forgot to declare yourselves as official religion de jour. But, hey, there is still time to accomplish this, plus complete all of the above. After all, you are so good at it!
So, salute yourselves with something produced with a minimal carbon footprint on another year of worthy endeavors!
Showing posts with label enviros. Show all posts
Showing posts with label enviros. Show all posts
Friday, April 24, 2009
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
GENTLE INNOCENCE
All of you are by now aware that sincerely yours is very much anti green. Most of you are aware that the company I work for is very much pro green (although I personally did not know it at the time I took the job). Fortunately, most of my co-workers do not usually raise my blood pressure, with few exceptions.
The one who probably annoys me the most got nicknamed Komsomolka; fortunately, only people who survived communist Russia can get the full appreciation of my private joke. Of course, that worthy individual is very Komsomol like when it comes to all matters green and pro-environment, in light of which the following vignette is even more ironic.
A couple of weeks ago she was put in charge of organizing the party celebrating our new identity (do not ask) for our division. That alone was a huge mistake and oversite, but that is not the point. To make the long story short, I was asked by her to order the cake for this shindig; and, since she can not work or let anyone else work in peace, that process took more time and effort than such undertaking usually warrants. At one point, she asked me how much the final product is going to cost. I replied that I did not find out yet, but it would probably cost a bundle, since the prices on flour have skyrocketed. "Yes, I know", was her reply, "it's because of oil, isn't it?"
Oy, gevalt! "No, it's the ethanol!" I just couldn't contain myself totally; fortunately, I had enough fortitude not to get into lengthy discussion, because with her it would have been not just a moot point, but a major annoyance for me. The most active green in our office has no idea about what causes high food (and for that matter, oil) prices! But she continues to enforce her miasma! What a wonderful illustration on this whole green, which is really red and brown, business!
The one who probably annoys me the most got nicknamed Komsomolka; fortunately, only people who survived communist Russia can get the full appreciation of my private joke. Of course, that worthy individual is very Komsomol like when it comes to all matters green and pro-environment, in light of which the following vignette is even more ironic.
A couple of weeks ago she was put in charge of organizing the party celebrating our new identity (do not ask) for our division. That alone was a huge mistake and oversite, but that is not the point. To make the long story short, I was asked by her to order the cake for this shindig; and, since she can not work or let anyone else work in peace, that process took more time and effort than such undertaking usually warrants. At one point, she asked me how much the final product is going to cost. I replied that I did not find out yet, but it would probably cost a bundle, since the prices on flour have skyrocketed. "Yes, I know", was her reply, "it's because of oil, isn't it?"
Oy, gevalt! "No, it's the ethanol!" I just couldn't contain myself totally; fortunately, I had enough fortitude not to get into lengthy discussion, because with her it would have been not just a moot point, but a major annoyance for me. The most active green in our office has no idea about what causes high food (and for that matter, oil) prices! But she continues to enforce her miasma! What a wonderful illustration on this whole green, which is really red and brown, business!
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
A MOMENT OF UNHOLY GLEE
Last week, about half an hour before I left work, I have decided to open the Net for the last minute check up of my e-mails and library account. That was when I experienced the moment of unholy glee when I saw one of the new headlines staring me boldly in the face: "Biofuel is a crime against humanity!" (according to some UN experts and studies).
Oh, really? Now you have realized it? Of course, by themselves both the UN and the entire environmental movement are crimes agings humanity, so, obviously, anything they cook up will follow suit. Unfortunately, united or separated, they will not simply kiss or kill each other, depending on the mood; everyone else is caught in the flying feathers. None the less, savor the moment I definitely did.
Oh, really? Now you have realized it? Of course, by themselves both the UN and the entire environmental movement are crimes agings humanity, so, obviously, anything they cook up will follow suit. Unfortunately, united or separated, they will not simply kiss or kill each other, depending on the mood; everyone else is caught in the flying feathers. None the less, savor the moment I definitely did.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
HAPPY EARTH DAY!
This morning, even after I have opened my Net and saw the disgusting green discoloration of the MSN page, it took me a little while to figure out that today is Earth's day. Now, since I have caught on, I can not pass this opportunity to offer my most profound and sincerest thanks to all the "green" people for the following:
The California wildfires, which are the direct result of tree huggers' activity.
The New Orleans levies, the repair of which the above mentioned tree huggers prevented, since it would have disrupted the local wildlife.
People suffering from malaria because DDT is outlawed.
The skyrocketing food prices, which resulted from the vigorous and unnecessary production of bio fuel.
Our continued dependence on OPEC, since we are prevented from using our own natural resources.
Putting the lives and well-being of human beings on the same, if not lower, level with animals.
Last, and most important, making me hate one of my favorite colors, which in my mind now and forever more is equated with your fascist's dictates.
For this, and many, many more wonderful deeds, thank you, environmentalists! Happy Earth Day!
The California wildfires, which are the direct result of tree huggers' activity.
The New Orleans levies, the repair of which the above mentioned tree huggers prevented, since it would have disrupted the local wildlife.
People suffering from malaria because DDT is outlawed.
The skyrocketing food prices, which resulted from the vigorous and unnecessary production of bio fuel.
Our continued dependence on OPEC, since we are prevented from using our own natural resources.
Putting the lives and well-being of human beings on the same, if not lower, level with animals.
Last, and most important, making me hate one of my favorite colors, which in my mind now and forever more is equated with your fascist's dictates.
For this, and many, many more wonderful deeds, thank you, environmentalists! Happy Earth Day!
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