I have a little suggestion for Dan Brown's new book. I mean, I have a very good suggestion for an idea for his next book, with almost ironclad guarantee of him not being sued by the possessors of that idea. Where did I get it? Would you believe it if I tell you I got it from the attendant at my local laundromat?
For whatever reason, this guys always enjoys schmoozing with me (I mean the attendant, not Dan Brown); and, in the best traditions of people from the late unlamented Soviet Union, his favorite topics are politics and political figures. In the realm of these topics, this guy is also a veritable unending fountain of conspiracy theories. The most popular of these, that the attacks of September 11 were engineered by our own government in general, and the Bush Administration in particular, was, of course, old news to me. In the best tradition of my people (Jews), I tried engaging my friendly attendant in a logical argument substantiated with facts, but, obviously, to no avail. I already stopped, and he still tried to persuade me that he was right; whatever.
Now, on my last visit, he entertained me with two more theories, which were both pretty fresh and extremely amusing. Number one: whatever policies put in motion by Gorbachev and led to the eventual demise of the Soviet Union, were instituted by him deliberately, after he received secret pay offs and the firm promises of comfortable life from American "Secret Services". Number two: the recent horrible earthquake in China was not a natural phenomenon, but something deliberately set off by American "Secret Services" from space, via satellites and secret weapons, in response to China's recent economic growth and America's recent economic troubles. So, how about these two: "Murderers and Useful Idiots" and "The Code of Ming"?