MORNING UPDATE - FEBRUARY 20

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! The weather is again NY February - at least it's sunny. Sniffles is laying on top of my chair and gently breathing in my ear. Scholastic ordered new illustrations for Harry Potter - the old expression of not gilding the lily comes to mind, and, in my opinion, both old and new illustrations stink. There are 7 bad habits that are good for you! Of course, the idiots only listed 5, but here they are: procrastination, coffee drinking, chocolate eating, napping, and alcohol consumption - yes!!! Going back to bed, then waking up, having another coffee, and chasing it with a nice chardonnay and nice piece of Godiva - oh, heck, procrastinated last month and did not get my freebies! Guess what is trending at # 1 right now? The speculation on whatever or not Victoria Beckham is preggers again - heck, what is it with the water and the air lately?! Celebs expecting right and left - and most of them are due this summer! USPS will launch a new clothing line in 2014 titled "Rain Heat & Snow" - good job, guys! While you are busy designing, could you please make sure to lose a piece of mail only once? Thanks! There is also a case of raising the salary for our dear comrade Hussein, because he is underpaid and maybe needs incentives - and no, this is not a line from The Onion. And the Academy decided not to call the event of the year 85th Academy Awards, but instead just call it the Oscars (to get rid of "musty" alternative title) - this is also not a line from The Onion. "Higgs Boson Particle May Spell Doom For the Universe" - I beg to differ; it's human stupidity that spells doom for the universe. In the fashion news: "ugly" 90's trend of wearing coveralls is coming back - well, at least people are still dressed. And on the hairdo front: parteigenosse Michelle claims that her bangs was her way of dealing with mid-life crisis - where is the spittoon when you need one, I ask you! No peep from either Windsors or Bieber today - bummer! Coffee this morning in my HP mug.

ANOTHER HEART-FELT CONGRATULATION

This time my sentiments are addressed to the esteemed 14th Dalai Lama. The following speaks for itself.

"Q: You have often stated that you would like to achieve a synthesis between Buddhism and Marxism. What is the appeal of Marxism for you?
A: Of all the modern economic theories, the economic system of Marxism is founded on moral principles, while capitalism is concerned only with gain and profitability. Marxism is concerned with the distribution of wealth on an equal basis and the equitable utilization of the means of production. It is also concerned with the fate of the working classes--that is, the majority--as well as with the fate of those who are underprivileged and in need, and Marxism cares about the victims of minority-imposed exploitation. For those reasons the system appeals to me, and it seems fair. I just recently read an article in a paper where His Holiness the Pope also pointed out some positive aspects of Marxism.
As for the failure of the Marxist regimes, first of all I do not consider the former USSR, or China, or even Vietnam, to have been true Marxist regimes, for they were far more concerned with their narrow national interests than with the Workers' International; this is why there were conflicts, for example, between China and the USSR, or between China and Vietnam. If those three regimes had truly been based upon Marxist principles, those conflicts would never have occurred.
I think the major flaw of the Marxist regimes is that they have placed too much emphasis on the need to destroy the ruling class, on class struggle, and this causes them to encourage hatred and to neglect compassion. Although their initial aim might have been to serve the cause of the majority, when they try to implement it all their energy is deflected into destructive activities. Once the revolution is over and the ruling class is destroyed, there is nor much left to offer the people; at this point the entire country is impoverished and unfortunately it is almost as if the initial aim were to become poor. I think that this is due to the lack of human solidarity and compassion. The principal disadvantage of such a regime is the insistence placed on hatred to the detriment of compassion.
The failure of the regime in the former Soviet Union was, for me, not the failure of Marxism but the failure of totalitarianism. For this reason I still think of myself as half-Marxist, half-Buddhist."

I do not feel like wasting my time (and that of my four esteemed readers) by refuting this dodo sentence by sentence; just like to add two things.

One: if you are still (forgive me) idiot enough to believe that we have to respect all other religions and cultures and they are just as good as ours, this is a clear con argument.

Two: is his tiny brain so mashed up with tofu and vegetables that he conveniently forgot that millions of his devout followers in Tibet at this very moment are being persecuted, tortured, and killed by the Marxist regime?

AN EVENING OF HOME ENTERTAINMENT

Or My Short Response to Barack Obama

Tuesday night, arriving home at the un-G-dly hour of ten forty eight pm, after a relatively uneventful day at work and a very enjoyable evening spent with beloved sibling and munchkins, I came to a strange conclusion: the night is young, and going to sleep just to be refreshed for the next workday is passé.

So, in accordance with this plan, I spent about half an hour playing America's favorite sport: flipping the channels on my TV remote. On the thirty fourth minute I realized that I will probably not see anything even remotely worthwhile, so I decided to finish my latest Netflix arrival. That was "Music and Lyrics", and I highly recommend it as a very sweet, light-hearted, feel-good with happy ending romantic comedy; plus, it had very enjoyable musical numbers in the style of the 80s music (OK, I am getting on in years).

After finishing the movie, I decided to play a bit on the Youtube; another very pleasant and time consuming activity, during which I found a music video of Sara Brightman singing "Harem". Sue me, but, despite the objectionable words due to the objectionable subject matter of this song, I actually enjoy the music and the beat (hey, nobody said that I was sane).

Next morning, while trying to wake up in the shower after half the night spent on those home entertainments, I was suddenly struck by this freaky connection: the movie and the song represented something diametrically opposed.

Now, a lot of people more gifted than yours truly already wrote brilliant summaries and responses to Obama's latest round of Muslim bootlicking, excuse me, attempts at diplomacy. But here is my short and not humble two cents worth of personal opinion.

Despite the fact that our non-esteemed supposed President went to Ivy League schools, and yours truly went to "Dura" college, I am firmly convinced that I am more knowledgeable in history than he is, even though I majored in psychology. All his claims to Muslim achievements are in error; whatever they supposed to have brought to civilization was brought by other nations and other religions. And even though thousand years ago they were better at medicine than the Europeans, come on! Even I am better at medical knowledge than the people who were convinced that you can heal wounds by the means of a fried field mouse. And they, by the way, made significant advancements since then; as apposes to the supposed beacons of civilization who only know how to torture and kill practically with their bare hands, but not to heal.

But Muslims always were, are, and will be famous (or infamous) for their elaborate harems and the entire culture attached to it (although that also was invented before their time).
Americans, on the other hand, are famous for their constant and almost unwavering hope for a better tomorrow. The Kenyan bastard stole that concept, trivialized and cheapened it in his campaign. But the concept is alive and well.

Other countries also make movies that have a happy ending, and that extol the healing power of love, friendship, art, and hope; but somehow, American movies are still the best and mostly unique in that regard.

And that, my friends, is the ironic connection that my head made when it was trying to wake up while being shampooed.

STRANGE THOUGHT

Recently, Retired General Colin Powell decided to get up and offer some unsolicited political advice.

Since the respected retired warrior showed his true colors a long time ago (at least to me), I tried to basically ignore his latest rant. But there was one vignette that caught my attention.

He blobbed something to the tune that somebody (I do not remember precisely if it were conservatives, or GOP, or some other related entity) should realized that Americans want more government control in their lives, not less.

With all due respect and admiration, general, people who do not or cannot control their lives (or, at least the overwhelming majority of aspects in their lives) are not free people. They are slaves. Believe me, I know! That is one of the many lessons offered to us by The Old Testament in relation to the Exodus from Egypt and subsequent events. And that is also one constant I observed in many people from step-mother country.

Just something to mull over in your time free from endorsing the enemies of this country, general.

NEWS (BREAKING AND OTHERWISE)

I love opening the Internet with my first cup of coffee and perusing the headlines offered by MSM or Yahoo. It is especially entertaining on Monday mornings. Yesterday was no exception.

For starters, some entity or other, very influential and informed, published a list of ten countries whose occupants were the happiest. Unsurprisingly, USA did not make the list.

Hum, let's see. The productive part of us works pretty hard (hardest in the world, by the way). After that, three branches of government confiscate a nice chunk of it (from 25% to infinity) in order to support their own bloated apparatuses, all manner of deadbeats (homegrown and imported), around twenty millions of illegals and their progeny, unwashed hippies masquerading as intellectuals and college professors, hardened criminals on death row who bleat to all and sundry about the social injustice done to them, blood-thirsty thugs from UN, and all kind of other assorted ungrateful swine on our soil and around the world. If we protest this highway robbery, we are locked up in the federal pen (together with the above-mentioned murderers). Lately, we also managed to accumulate enough psychos and idiots masquerading as registered voters to end up with the Executive and Legislative branches we have today. We are dubbed "The Great Satan" by the most blood-thirsty mass murderers alive today. Anything to smile about? For me personally, and I am sure for millions of my fellow Americans, the fact that we are Americans is in itself a blessing. With G-d's help and blessing, we will overcome the above-mentioned menace as well.

Another bit of news: Miss California may lose her crown due to (insert the list of assorted nonsense). The truth is: she dared to speak against one of liberals' holy cows; which opened a floodgate of the vicious attacks by those self-described defenders of human rights. Burt Prelutsky, being his usual blunt self, added a great vignette to this: she is white, blond and blue-eyed. If she was black, her statement would not have been such an issue. As of "press time", Donald, for whatever reasons, deemed Carrie Prejean worthy of her title. The said piece of news makes me rejoice to no end: not as a fan of Miss America pageant, but as an American citizen.

The other piece of news from last week was not breaking, judging by the way it was covered (or, rather, not covered) by the kissers of Obama's behind (otherwise known as the media). Somewhere in the depths of the State of Louisiana an American citizen was stopped on the road by the police and detained for half an hour on suspicion of being a right-wing extremist. His horrible crime? A pro-Constitutional bumper sticker, O Horror Of Horrors! The witch hunt is officially on!

Lastly, His Holiness decided to visit the Holy Land and utter His Esteemed Opinion to the tune of there would be no peace in the Middle East if we do not have a Palestinian State (on the land currently belonging to Israel, aka The Little Satan, of course).

Previously, I already offered my opinion in regards to the utter cowardice and stupidity displayed by the heads of the Catholic Church. Allow me to re-iterate some pertinent points. One: how about first you guys clean your own house, which at the present is infiltrated with homosexuals, pedophiles, and homosexual pedophiles. Two: show some self-respect. Half-Kenyan, half-Muslim bastard agrees to speak at Georgetown only after all the references to what you call The Son are covered, and you do not boo. Self-same bastard, who claims that is it above his pay grade to save unwanted children who miraculously survived abortion (and if I am not mistaken, abortion is a serious abomination in your estimation) is invited to speak at Notre Dame; your simple flock is protesting (vehemently); the heads of Notre Dame (and their superiors) do not boo. I am not even starting about the religion of peace, from whose members' behinds your heads are due to be extracted surgically. Three: if you attack fiction books, at least read them first: in my humble opinion the biggest threat to you comes not from Dan Brown, never mind Harry Potter. The biggest threat comes from Philip Pullman, and he himself was surprised at how little he was picked on. Finally, contaminate your souls a bit and read Harry Potter. It will teach you the beauty of standing up to your convictions no matter the personal cost, and the bravery and the purity of soul necessary in order to fight and defeat the True Evil.

SWINE UPDATE

Last Thursday morning, our office building super personally delivered very important memorandums to each and every tenant. The memorandums, of course, were in regards to the swine flu. Aside from the usual nonsense, theybasically copied and pasted the advice from the CDC website, which recommended the following:

Covering nose and mouth with a tissue when coughing and sneezing, and then discarding that tissue; thoroughly washing our hands with soap and water (alcohol also seems to be effective); trying to avoid contact with sick people; and (the gem) if you become sick, CDC recommends you to stay home.

Not to be outdone by these genius actions, that same afternoon our director of HR sent everyone the following e-mail:

"Everyone -- There has been much in the news this week about Swine Flu. Flu viruses spread through person-to-person or other close contact. It can take up to five to seven days to become sick after being exposed. We encourage everyone to take precautions and maintain good health habits.

If you are ill – flu or otherwise – we encourage you to stay home. We appreciate your wanting to come in to get work done. However, when you’re not feeling well, typically you don’t function at your best. Just as important, you increase the risk of spreading germs to others in the office.
Here is a link to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention that offers tips on stopping the spread of germs at work: http://www.cdc.gov/germstopper/work.htm "

Now, here is my five cent question to all of this: we only get fifteen work days off for the entire year that includes vacation, sick leave, personal leave, mental health days, etc. So, who is going to compensate us for extra time off: benevolent Obama Administration?

And speaking of that magnificent entity (our government, that is), as this little piece "goes to print", there were no news, breaking or otherwise, about quarantine of anyone recently returned from Mexico, or, at least temporarily, curtailing communications with that extremely advanced country.

Brilliant!! Another job well done!!!

WHAT TO DO WITH THE SWINE?

By now it is the official breaking news: swine flu is the official threat from sea to shining sea, and there is the first official confirmed death from it in the United States.

Swine flu is believed to have originated in Mexico. Great! Wonderful! Fantastic! Another present from the general direction of America-hating banana republics; one in the long line that includes bed bugs (which, by the way, together with malaria, are effectively controlled by DDT), pushy America-haters who are busy waving our flag upside-down, drug-resistant TB, shady work ethics, amazing ability to leach off every single social program we have (to the significant determent of American taxpayers), MS 13, total disrespect for our culture, and people devoid of manners on New York subway (just to name a few).

Our government officials, in their infinite, bottomless wisdom, are screening all arriving from Mexico. HOW ABOUT PEOPLE WHO ARRIVE ILLEGALLY? WHO SCREENS THEM?

And for the love of all that is holy could you please, please start deporting the illegals and secure the damn south border!

HOLIDAY HIGHLIGHTS

Part 1

This past Holiday, just like any other, was a chance to visit as many friends as my feet would allow. In the process, I have accumulated some noteworthy highlights. So, without further ado, here is part one.

There are two "American" families that I usually love to visit. The reasons for this love are manifold, but mainly it is because these people are so "un-Flatbushly" friendly, accepting, and non-judgmental. Also due to their friendliness, there is always a chance that I would see somebody who would grade on my nerves (but I usually try to accept the goodness with a bit of badness attached to it). Unfortunately, during the visits to one of these houses there is usually a fifty percent chance that one of the guests would irritate my nerves to the extent that those same nerves would not be able to keep my yup closed; and the heated debate usually ensues (although my kindhearted friend usually calls it "difference of opinions"). This Passover, unfortunately, was no exception.

One of her married sons, in the best traditions of young marrieds studying in the Holy Land, was visiting for the holidays. And he was not visiting alone. A friend of his youth, a freshly minted attorney at law, also came for a celebratory meal. The boisterous conversation was progressing just swimmingly till something I said produced a half-joking warning not to tangle with yours truly, because, apparently, once I am a member of the NRA, I will shoot anyone and everyone who disagrees with me.

Upon hearing this, young lawyer visibly perked up and asked me if indeed I was a member, and if yes, why. Foolishly, I actually explained. Gosh, when will I ever learn? To summarize our lively and pointless discussion, here are the pertinent points:

He is a Republican (G-d help us).

He hates to admit it, but Obama is doing a great job so far (please see above).

I did not read the text of the Second Amendment; otherwise I would know that there is no such thing as constitutionally guaranteed right to bear arms (his conviction on both points was a joy to behold).

Only because NRA is the most powerful lobby, did we ever get it into our heads that governmental gun control is unconstitutional (later grudgingly agreed with yours truly that enviros are the most powerful lobby, not NRA).

Government has full constitutional right to interfere in the economy (what in blazes did he study again?).

He did not vote, since in New York it does not make a difference anyway (please see numerous previous entries).

Tobacco tax is perfectly fine (even if the majority of smokers are psychiatric patients); because they are harming themselves, and we just tax them in order to pay for their medical expenses (please see number five and number one).

Constitution is “a living, breathing document", and Supreme Court has full right to mangle it any way they want (please see number five).

There were many more interesting points of contention. What really made me laugh was his sage agreement with me when I pointed out that Obama never proved his eligibility for the office as a person born as an American, which is a constitutional requirement.

Among many things, that discussion made me wonder again as to the precise definitions of constitutional law and constitutional lawyer. Aren't all our laws supposed to be constitutional, seeing as we are, well, Constitutional Republic? And aren't all lawyers supposed to be constitutional, meaning know the constitution and strictly adhere to it? Also, using another old cliché, if this dude thinks he hates liberals (while he already bought about half of their bilge), why do I need enemies with friends like this?

Please see number one.

ANOTHER SINCERE THANK YOU

Dear Janet Napolitano and (by association) Barak Hussein Obama,

Thank you to both of you from the bottom of my heart!

According to the latest Homeland Security Report, I am now officially a "right-wing extremist" because I am opposed to any and all government interference when it comes to the individual gun ownership. I also made the grade by being opposed to what you euphemistically call "immigration" and I call illegal invasion. According to that brilliant summation of yours, there are apparently "right-wing extremists" who "stockpiled" guns and ammo with express purposes of shooting "immigrants" crossing borders from Mexico. I am a little hazy on that one: is it not the job of the Border Patrol to shoot those "immigrants from Mexico" due to their blatant violation of our borders? Or, after Ramos and Compean, that job is now relegated to the "fringe elements" of our society?

Last, but not least, even though neither I personally, nor anyone close to me belonged to the Military at any given time; I deeply appreciate the cheap potshot your Report took at the veterans.

Another job well done!

OK, WHATEVER YOU SAY

Here is a little chain of events, seemingly unconnected:

One not so fine morning few weeks ago, I have officially (and sarcastically) thanked (again) all the Obama supporters via Facebook. That outpouring of gratitude followed the blatant demonstration of black supremacy and racism witnessed by me that same morning on the way to work. One of my friends was slightly surprised by the fact that I am still bitter; according to him, by now it was only I and Ann Coulter.

One of my younger co-workers, who usually enjoys impersonating Childe Harold, being in his usual chirpy mood, kept sighing and complaining about the hard life. Upon hearing this, I politely suggested he visits Central Africa to learn about true hardships of life and even offered to purchase him a one-way ticket. His reaction? "I wish I could really go there!"

George, our cat, periodically goes on hunger strikes; the only reason we could detect is this: he would eat the food served to him, and then decide (for reasons known only to him) that it is no longer edible. At which point he would complain till he is literally horse, but will not eat the unpalatable offerings. Which, by the way, reminded me of a very first pet my baby brother had: a little hamster called Monster Ball, who did not usually stuff his check pouches and, unless he was really hungry, would totally ignore his food, even if it was literally landing by his feet.

When Bernard Goldberg's "100 people" came out in paperback, it graduated to "110" people, and only recently was I able to lay my hands on this edition. I did not get a chance to peruse it yet (my Dad is doing it right now), but here is my suggestion to the latest edition of people who "are screwing up America":

Number 3: US Congress and US Senate combined (with very minor exceptions)

Number 2: The current so-called President of the United States

Number 1: 61 million registered voters (minus whatever dead people were included in this number thanks to ACORN) who voted for this boy-wonder currently embarrassing and destroying our country from the 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, plus whatever number of registered voters who deliberately voted for any independent candidate in whatever protest, plus whatever number of registered voters who deliberately did not vote in this election because they continued to sit on their moral outrage. Whatever the actual number, the honor should go to all of them equally.

You see, even though I do not know Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, and the rest of the so-called conservative radio and TV personalities personally, and therefore cannot vouch with precision as to their emotional state, I am not bitter. I am heartbroken. It has been almost five months since that horrible day in November, and every day since then the nightmare just grows in its monstrosity.

In what other country on earth do you have cats that do not eat because they do not like the food, or hamsters that ignore their food?! Better yet, in the immortal words of one of the D'Souza's readers, this is the only country where poor people are fat! And on that note, in what other country do you have that high percentage of ungrateful swine, homegrown or imported (either voluntarily or involuntarily), who do not appreciate the beauty and unique premise of this country and instead go around with sour faces, complaining non-stop and praising any and all bloody dictatorships as the ideal country to live in?

Yes, "we have serious problems and we need serious people to solve those problems"; that does not mean surrendering at the first sign of those serious problems! Blind, deaf, and dumb sissies! Instead of fighting for this country that gave you everything, you surrendered it to its haters who are destroying it even as we speak! And the biggest part of this heartbreak is that amongst those in the first category are my relatives, friends, good acquaintances, and just Jews - people whom I love and respect, or at least like, and whose souls are connected to mine all the way to the Exodus from Egypt and Mount Sinai! But, hey, I am just a bitter right-wing nut job, and you, guys and girls, aside from being more educated and informed, were just exercising your right to chose! I should just relax, take a deep breath, and "give the dude a chance"; or, better yet, get a life, because, apparently, I should just broaden my horizons and acquire some more interests, aside from politics (my favorite being that my interest in politics stems from my being single and childless, ergo having nothing better to do).

Well, enjoy your choices and the freedom to make them! I only pray that when the final tally from those choices comes in, it will not be something on the magnitude of what I had to survive seven and a half years ago, and that still sometimes haunts my dreams (also a result of choices made by the majority of my people). May The Master of The Universe protect us all!

TWO LITTLE DEMONSTRATIONS

Both of these happened at my place of employment, which, in the best traditions of educated people on both coasts, is almost totally staffed with serious lefties.

One: being a serious Harry Potter devotee, I was impatiently waiting for J.K.'s 800 word composition which she had penned for charity and which was supposed to be from "the prequel she is not working on". Long story short, I missed buying it from the publisher and ended up haunting the e-bay actions. Finally, the coveted transaction was completed, and now I was impatiently waiting for my package to arrive. After a while I was ready to e-mail the seller and politely inquire about the actual shipping date; lo and behold, I get the office mail to sort, and here it is: a hated orange post card with "we attempted to deliver your package". I ran after our rude mailman with the effing card, pointing out that a) the date indicated was a business day, and b) I was right here. No dice; he point blank lied about somebody else sorting the mail that day, and then rudely suggested that I should just go "around the corner" to the post office and claim my package. Since I do not get lunch break during the winter time, for yours truly it meant not only going to deal with another rude and disgusting federal employee, but also staying late after work to make up the time.

Overjoyed about the whole scenario, I called into question the competence, mental capacity, and legitimacy of the above mentioned post people. One of my co-workers happened to pass by my desk at the time and jokingly suggested to me to express my emotions and not battle them up. What he did not know was that my name calling and frustration were not just directed at the federal employees, but at him and his colleagues as well. Because the day it happened was the election day, and I knew that almost all of them made special efforts to vote for the new stinking messiah, who's official campaign promises were to put a whole new army of these incompetent nincompoops, who cannot even read properly and carry a 1.6 pound package to its destination, but somehow would be the only people capable and equipped to fix the economy and healthcare, usher the world peace, and control the climate, just to name a few.

Two: you are all familiar with the old leftie songs about raising taxes "for the rich”, "spreading the wealth around", et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, ad infinitum. The words may change, but the tunes are always the same. Anyway, back to the story. One of our offices had been floundering financially for a while, mainly due to the almost total lack of business acumen of the person in charge. At the periodic staff meetings, we were informed for about three times in a row that that office was performing at a loss. Finally, the powers that be announced that almost everyone at that office was let go (aside, of course, from the head who messed it up in the first place). Guess what happened next? One of my leftie, earth-sustaining, taxes-are-patriotic co-workers told me that he was glad it finally happened because (are you ready for this) this office was dragging the whole company down and it affected our bonuses and 401(K) s! Do not get me wrong, I understand the cold, sometimes brutal laws that govern capitalists-based economy. But for this bleeding heart leftie!!! Of course, he had to make a caveat that he sort of feels bad, he wants to be a team player, blah, blah, blah. All the compassionate, feel good rhetoric went down the drain when he felt the direct results of such wealth-spreading; and the fate of around thirty people who are now unemployed did not really bother him that much.

TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE

I had a little chance to complain before about my friend sort of standing me up for the Hashivenu weekend; here is an entry dedicated to the interesting young lady I ended up sharing a room with.

Thankfully, I did not really get a chance to socialize with her till Saturday night, because we both came there for different reasons, with different friends and relatives, and with different plans. Anyway, Saturday night, after enjoying the pool with my sis and the munchkins, I went back to my room and found my roommate watching financial news on MSNBC (which should have given me the first clue). Anyway, we engaged in some small talk, in the course of which she divulged to me that she used to work on Wall Street back in the day, but is now out of this racket, and happier for it. I just kept nodding and uhu-ing politely; and then the Madoff's name was mentioned on TV, and she shook her head and pronounced something to the extent that she cannot believe the gullibility of the people. "If it sounds too good to be true, how can you fall for it?" - was her wise exclamation.

"Why are you so surprised “ - was my answer -” just look at who was elected the President". Oh, Mama, who asked me to open my big yup? "What do you mean?" - was her immediate and aggressive response. I tried to explain my basic objections to the guy, to my detriment. I was treated to a whole lecture. She is a Republican (so what?); she disapproved of the war (what else is new?); Bush was a horrible President (again, what else); it is high time to elect a black President (thanks for repeating the lefty tripe); it is wonderful that so many Jews voted for him (so now HAMAS will withdraw their approval of his candidacy, Sharpton will yell "mea culpa" for the Crown Heights riots and will voluntarily report to the NYS DOC to serve a life sentence for the murder of poor Yankel Rosenbaum, and Jackson will publicly apologize for all his past anti-Semitic rants and completely retire from public life); just look at the wonderful cabinet Obama assembled (to her credit, back in December all we knew about those boys and girls wonders was that they were, to quote Burt, "retreads from Clinton's thrift shop"; now we know what a wonderful collection of honest people they are as well); she was very torn before the elections, and even consulted a Rav, asking him if she would harm our people by voting for Obama, and the Rav did not directly say that she would (to quote "Guys and Dolls", I plead the Fifth Commandment; or, in plain Yiddish, Oy, gevalt). There was more, of course, but my recollections are a bit hazy. Few times I tried, unsuccessfully, to offer to agree to disagree; to no avail; she plowed on.

To conclude: if you vote for a proven demagogue who refuses to even prove his basic eligibility for the office; who's friends, acquaintances, mentors, neighbors, and political allies are all domestic and international terrorists, Marxists, socialists, Mafiosi, crooks, cheats, and liars; who's own lady wife is open America-hater; and who's candidacy was celebrated by every single Jew-hating group here, and was endorsed by HAMAS; and, last but not least, who himself is full of arrogance and hot air that usually comes from the wrong body orifice - to vote this for the President of the United States is a result of hard brain work. But to fall for the clever manipulations of a big time financial schemer - that is, at best, a very naïve decision on your part.

I rest my case (at least for now).

NOTHING NEW UNDER THE SUN

Or Remembering St. George

It probably would be a complete chutzpah on my part to re-affirm that King Solomon was a very wise man and a great prophet. But, as mentioned before, I am approaching the middle-age marker; and along with this usually come certain weariness and philosophical introspections (not that I did not over-analyze everything to death when I was younger). But, the more I observe my fellow humans and the more I try (albeit meagerly) to self-educate myself in history, the more I realize the beauty of this profound statement from Ecclesiastes.

Nothing is new under the sun. People seem to be changing constantly: food, clothes, customs, languages, borders of the countries, countries themselves; progress here, regress there, freedom, slavery, cannibalism, advance of human rights... Humanity (especially civilized part of it) seems to be constantly in motion, hopefully towards the better things. And then you stop and look a bit beneath the surface of things, and you realize that nothing really changes, and that the time basically goes in circles, like the times of the year or the phases of the moon. Human beings (even the civilized ones) are actually diminishing with each generation removed from the original pair created by G-d. And all the darker parts of the human soul rear their ugly heads again and again.

Believe it or not, the disgustingly idiotic circus of the past few months otherwise known in this country as the last Presidential elections presented a wonderful demonstration. American public had to opportunity to observe, or even to participate in the oldest, and, in a sense, most repugnant rituals of humans: idol worship, black ingratitude, and the mass hysteria of the demented mob. By the last count, the rituals are still in full swing.

Few months ago, I got into another philosophical mode while reading one of Prelutsky's articles. In it, he was mocking the college commencement speeches that are always praising the graduating class as the best of the best. According to him, most of the graduating youngsters are not dreaming of slaying the dragon; they just want to find a job and start paying off their tuition loans. I agree with Burt that graduating classes are rarely the best of the best, especially in the view of their overwhelming participation in this wonderful cult of personality we all are currently witnessing. But what a sad thing to think that the younger generation is not dreaming of heroic actions! When else in your live can you dream of slaying a dragon and saving everyone, if not when you are a teenager or a young adult?

And sadder still is the realization that even if you did daydream of being a hero in your younger days, the older you get, the more you realize that dragon is not the worst you will have to engage in battle if you want to retain your humanity. Dragon lives in you: your lack of faith, moments of despair, hopelessness, and evil inclination in general. But from the outside enemies, dragon, as horrible and vicious as he may be, always attacks head on. The bloodiest, most exhausting, and sometimes seemingly hopeless battles would always be with jackals and snakes.

Finally, on the heels of all the different disjointed thoughts and musings, another realization crystallized in my mind quite some time ago - I have a bad case of a very old Jewish sickness. Which one is it? The desire to stick my stiff Jewish neck in the matters that should not really concern me as a Jew; you see, I know that this country is only a stop on our very long journey back home, to the Holy Land. But I love this country; I love it with every fiber of my being. This country sheltered me, allowed me to discover who I am and to be who I am, and, as I mentioned before, most probably saved my life. Gratitude is in our genetic makeup; and I will not give up on this country. I will resist her enemies (especially the domestic ones) as much as I can; and I will pray to The Heavenly Father to continue to protect and to bless this here US of A.

ANOTHER LITTLE PS

Plus, a bit more musing re: Harry Potter

Ladies and Germs:

Thank you again for all your comments regarding my reaction to the results of the last elections. As always, I was not disappointed (by and large). So, here is my response (again, not humble):

One: again, this is just my blog; not an official publication, or editorial, or a textbook, or even Internet news venue. Just my little ole blog. So, with all due respect and admiration, I reserve the full right to express my opinions, as unpalatable as they may be. Ditto for my language. Thank The Good Lord, this is still a free country; I have a full freedom of speech under the much abused and misinterpreted First Amendment. BO is not in full power yet, so, no official censorship or thought police were instituted yet.

Two: I would love to posses the eternal wisdom, all the secrets of the Universe, the ability to always be right, and to always know the correct answers. Common sense dictates that I am just a human being, ergo flawed and prone to errors. Having said that, I firmly confirm already expressed opinion: anyone who voted for Barak Hussein Obama was, at best, a well-meaning useful idiot. Next on the list are plain idiots, misinformed idiots, uneducated idiots, ungrateful swine, racists, morons of all stripes, America-hates, and, lastly, people who plainly committed treason. With all the facts glaring into everyone's faces, the decision to vote for that pathetic excuse for a politician was, at best, misinformed.

Three: he is NOT my President. Since he officially gave up his Senate seat, and till the official confirmation by the Electors he is just a figure head, albeit in this case an extremely loud one and full of chutzpah. Only after the official Electoral confirmation does he become a President-Elect, and only after official swearing in next January does he become a President. And, here is a final little snag: I refuse to acknowledge him as my President-Elect or my President, till he produces his original, official, and confirmed by an unbiased specialists as real, birth certificate. Until this worthless windmill confirms that he satisfies ALL Constitutional requirements for the office of the President, considering him as such is a violation of the letter of our Constitution; never mind the spirit, since I am sure that the writers and ratifiers of the Constitution did not even dream of such America-hater as a citizen, never mind the Presidential candidate, never mind the actual President. On the practical side, here is the petition that demands the birth certificate:
http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=81550

Four: I am unwilling to give him a chance because he does not deserve one.

Five: till January 20 (or 21; sorry, dyslexia strikes again), George W. Bush is our President. By the way, apparently, I have been spelling his name in a Jewish way; sorry, Mr. President! The only thing it means, aside, again, from my dyslexia, is that I still got respect for you.

Six: the main quality of a good leader is not "confidence of the citizens"; it is his or her ability to lead, not to collect overexcited crowds of fainting fans; and, most importantly, to do the right thing for the country despite the opinion of the majority, or the opinion of the educated morons, or the opinion of the uneducated idiots, or, for that matter, despite the opinions of the prostituted media or treasonous Hollywood.

Seven: again, despite my wishes, I can not see into the future, clearly or otherwise. Hopefully, Merciful Father will spear us, but I can not help but feel deep glum at the prospect of this unillustrious Presidency.

Finally, this brings me to another matter. As you are aware, there are many newsworthy, or, in my opinion, spittoon-worthy tidbits floating all other the TV, newspapers, and the Internet. One of such brilliant observations was a little article to the tune that our dear Barak is, apparently, a geek, since he read Harry Potter and has some kind of wacky screen saver on his computer (the other details I do not recall). Being a pretty hard-core Potter fan, this particular article made me wonder a bit. Which character from the series best characterizes Obama? I did not have to think long or hard to come to the following conclusion: he is definitely a cross between Peter Pettigrew and Gilderoy Lockhart.

After that, I tried to imagine our dear BO under the sorting hat. Again, I think The Hat would have ratted out the answer immediately upon hitting that ugly head. Obama does not posses the chivalry and bravery of Gryffindors, nor the loyalty and humility of Hufflepuffs, nor the true wisdom and studiousness of Ravenclaws. He does, however, posses plenty of guile and the willingness to achieve his goal by any means that characterised Slytherins. And speaking of Slytherin: Obama is a half-blood that takes any advantage he can from belonging to one side while always denying the other. Remind you of anyone else from the Slytherin House?

HISTORIC ELECTIONS

These elections were definitely historic; not in the sense the prostitutes from the media would like us to see, but historic none the less.

Some time ago my sis, in the best traditions of sisters and best friends, chided me for my excessive use of the word "stupid". In her opinion, considering my vocabulary, I should spice up my speech a bit. Agreed; but sometimes, especially when you are in a grip of a strong emotion, simple words are the best, so, dear readers, gird yourselves: you will see a lot of "stupids" in this composition. Another memory, also involving my sister, has something to do with our trip to London. Like any decent tourists, we went on the double-decker tour on our first day. Our over hyper guide kept repeating the same phrase over and other again "Princess Diana: gone, but not forgotten"; at the certain point of the tour, everyone starter finishing the darn phrase for him. After all, it was 1999, and her death was still fresh in everyone's memory; although, come to think of it, they still can't let the poor disturbed woman rest in peace. Anyway, I will impersonate this guide here by repeating, over and over again, "thanks, media". OK, introductions are over; let's begin.

First of all, we have seen the historic display of stupidity that was displayed by the American electorate. Nothing else would explain why we are now saddled with a President-elect whom Eric Rush very eloquently called "one of the greatest purveyors of male bovine fecal matter in human history". It is just very sad to realize that in our age of computers, Internet, cell phones, satellites, billions of bits of information and their lightning quick dissemination, the majority of the people who showed up by the polls have voted for a pathological liar. Oh, yea, and thank you, media!

I mean, it really boggles the mind: a lawyer who went to school solely due to affirmative actions and support from America-haters, a guy who had spend 143 days in the Senate, has no real life or political experience to recommend him, refused to produce his birth certificate to prove his citizenship, has consistent and uninterrupted history of associating with racists, anti-Semites, black supremacists, socialists, Marxists, domestic and international terrorists and their sympathizers, consistently voted along the liberal left lines, expressed the desire for diplomacy with the world's most vicious dictators, and, along with his beautiful wife, expressed open contempt for this country! And this monstrosity is presented to us as a half-deity, a new messiah, a unifier of the nation, an end to all of America's woes, a lover of the "little guy", and a new dawn for the country! Thank you, media, for creating this bizarrely surreal image! And my deep, everlasting gratitude to every single stupid moron of a registered voter who cast a ballot for this nightmarish chimera!

Let's see: 96% of black votes went to him, but that is not racist at all, no siree bob. More than 70% of single women without children voted for this sex symbol as well; girls, with all due respect, and even though I belong to this particular electoral group, this is going to be a first time in my life when I will side with the opposition (judgmental harpies) and tell you these two things: no wonder you are single, and there is no need to perpetuate your genetic pool. Majority of Hispanic votes went to this dude as well: no comment (or rather, a separate entry). All together, majority of women voted for this one, as long as some white men. In my not humble opinion, anyone who is "white" or makes anything slightly above the minimum wage, and who had voted for this demigod, was simply performing an exercise in masochism. Ladies and gents, why did you not just come out and said so? I am sure you would have been provided with leather, restrains, whips, chains, and whatever else you require by the other part of the electorate (I personally would have volunteered my last dollars towards this worthy endeavor); I mean, we are all adults here, so why so sheepish all of the sudden? Believe me, we would rather you perform your rituals on yourselves, and not confide us to what looks like four years of hell in the bargain.

Looking at the myriad of absolutely delirious with happiness faces that were celebrating Obama's victory, I could not help but wonder: OK, the case with white morons I just explained; but what about the black morons? If America is such horrible country, which began with slavery and continuously exercised the politics of racial inequality, than what force on earth prevented the blacks, beginning with approximately 1865, from following the path of the young couple from the infamous novel by Harriet Beecher Stowe? In case you are unfamiliar with this literary masterpiece, I will explain: what exactly holds the blacks here, in the US, and prevents them from expatriating to their beloved Africa, the cradle of life? The answer is very simple, and if it does not stare you straight in the face, again, very not humbly, I cannot help you.

The dust is beginning to settle, so to speak, but the carnival of idiocy is hardly over; in depth commentary, from both sides, of what went wrong for the Republicans. Here is my uneducated and not humble opinion. One: you cannot fight a pool of crocodiles, jackals, and sharks using Queensbury rules of engagement; period. That was the main mistake of the Busch presidency and the McCain's campaign. Two: thank you, media! It is pretty hard to fight a constant campaign of deliberate misinformation waged by every single major network, newspaper, and Internet venue, while armed with only Fox News, independent Internet news venues, and a bunch of dedicated bloggers. Three: our rotten education system, long ago taken over by aging and young hippies, including former "weathermen", which, of course, explains the overwhelming support of under thirty voters for the new messiah. Four: the stock market crash, which was, of course, Clinton's mess, but, thanks to number two and three, ended up being, of course, Busch's, and, by default, all Republicans' fault (I am sure Clintons and their cronies are laughing themselves silly right now). Five: two unpopular wars, in case of which I would like to ask: should the members of the religion of peace hijack another few plains and fly them into the Sears Tower, John Hancock Building, The Empire State Building, and the Space Needle, for a good measure, for these wars to become popular again?

This, by the way, brings to my mind a little scene from a book I read in my lonely childhood about the Spartacus rebellion. The scene goes like this: a bunch of drunken patricians, quickly becoming more and more intoxicated, were raining different curses on the government. They were getting more and more inventive, and finally, one of them yelled "Let the Jupiter incinerate our Senate!", to which another drunken young man quietly added: "just let him warn me in advance, so I should not come in that day". So, in case Osama (who, by the way, is probably getting drunk from joy right now in whatever cave he is hiding) is planning another terrorist action against us, I do not mind another plane (providing it will only contain Mohamed and Abdulla) flying into our Senate, as long as at that particular moment it will only house Pelosi, Reid, Boxer, Kucinich, Kennedy, Obama, and, most importantly, Murtha.

Speaking of Murtha, what in blazes happened to the population of the good state of Pennsylvania? One guy threatens to bankrupt their main source of revenue, and they elect him a President; another one insults them from here to eternity, and they re-elect him to Congress. Another exercise in masochism and stupidity.

And speaking of paradise on earth in general, and economy in particular; since when is it a goverment's job to provide us with jobs, free medical and dental care, education, houses, and chickens in every pot? Here is the definition of capitalist economy given by Walter Williams, who has a Ph.D. in the subject and teaches it in college: "economic system based on private ownership and control over of the means of production. Under laissez-faire capitalism, government activity is restricted to the protection of the individual's rights against fraud, theft and the initiation of physical force." Expanding on that, government’s role all together should be in protecting us from criminals inside, enemies from outside, and in protection of our individual rights and freedoms as guaranteed by the Constitution. Ha, ha, hearty har har with a cherry on top! According to the new crown prince of Kenya, who is now our President-elect, government is our new and better mommy, who is going to kiss our every bubu and take away all our worries.

So, now (at least, according to Yahoo and MSN), everyone is concerned with the new "first puppy", its potential breed, and the best names for it. Second on the least is Michelle Obama, with her elegant style and her plans for moving the family to the White House. Where is the spittoon when one needs it? Meanwhile, the one and only kisser of our bubus is creating a new cabinet full of former Clintonistas, promising the civilian trials for the suspected terrorists at Guantanamo, and, all of the sudden, reminding us that we should not expect immediate fixes and prepare ourselves for a long wait. All of this, while leaders of HAMAS were rushing in their official congratulations; they really wanted to be the first ones to congratulate him!

As to my people... Deep sigh. Can I just remind you, guys and gals, that turning the other cheek is not in our religious cannons? How blind, deaf, dumb, and stupid did we have to be to vote in such overwhelming majority for a guy whose friends are a bunch of anti-Semites and terrorist hacks? Moreover, a black liberal, supported by blacks and Hispanics, who both are biggest anti-Semitic groups in America today (right after Muslims, that is). The day before the elections some Jewish sounding dude posted an article on JWR, which started by posting a question: how come both Muslims and Jews support Obama in such overwhelming numbers? Well, one of them must be stupid, and his money was on the Jews. What a brilliant observation! For my part, allow me to add this: forget about the "mystical" connection we all have, or the fact that both our good and bad deeds have profound effect on the rest of us. Let us just look at the issue from "mundane" point of view. All of you are free, thinking (hopefully) human beings, endowed by our Creator with the freedom of choice, and the full right to stand by those choices. So, when you attend a congregation that is run by a spiritually corrupt leader, that is your choice and your problem. When you send your children (and subsequently pay the tuition) to the school that I would love to destroy, because I know for a fact that it destroys faith instead of instilling it, that is your choice and both your and my problem. But when you willingly and proudly voted for that bastard son of a whoremonger, in the process betraying this country, the Holy Land, and the best interests of our people, and then arrogantly declared your happiness with your choice, please do not expect me to either respect you or your choice, or to be quiet, for that matter.

For me, the outcome of these elections is a test of faith. I know that He heard our prayers and said "no"; I firmly believe that He will never forsake us or this country; but I am human and I can't help my overwhelming sadness and the feeling of defeat. Since the official announcement, I have run though a whole score of emotions. A former psych major in me recognized a certain pattern; finally I realized that the succession of emotions was that of grief. Not for President Busch, Senator McCain, or Governor Palin, even though I really feel for them on different levels, and wish them all the best. My feelings are for my country. My beautiful country, which gave me shelter, freedom, and a sense of my true purpose. My country was voluntary surrendered to the people who hate it! I can't sleep, or stop crying, and my blood pressure is up 14 points since last August. OK, deep breaths, Barbie, deep breaths.

One of the many things that I learned in my twenty years of living here is undying hope and unbeatable optimism. So, I will dry my tears and remind myself that surrender and defeat are never viable options. Yes, we suffered a tremendous blow. But we can always fight, even in small ways; always remember that He Alone ultimately knows the past, the present, and the future; and always hope for His Mercy and His Blessings.

DECISION 2008

Official disclaimer: I will attempt to quote a few bloggers and commentators, but, due to my advanced stage of tiredness and the general "cholant" condition of my brain, I do not always remember who said what; for this, my apologies in advance.

In college, during one of the education courses, we were exchanging ideas as to how to make kids remember that every fourth year is a leap year. For some unfathomable reason, I suggested the following solution: presidential elections happen every leap year. The professor liked my idea; plus she deadpanned something to the tune that that explains why we end up with what we end up. Since we are in the leap year again, ergo another presidential election, I felt like musing on the subject a bit (and to borrow the headline from my beloved mainstream TV).

Everyone who knows me can vouch for the fact that I am "passionate" about politics. Deep sigh. The truth is, I would rather discuss Harry Potter or Madeline Hunter till your ears wilt and your eyelids droop, than discuss politics. I am way more passionate about my reading material than I am about politics. Being interested in politics and familiar with the issues is a developed self-defense. As I mentioned many times before, for people who have a life, especially a family life, political concerns are not a priority at all. Unfortunately, such lax attitude allowed a small, but extremely loud and malevolent group the almost total destruction of our educational system, passage of draconian laws that are destroying our economy, demoralization of our troupes, and the eventual loss of the war that we actually could have won and that eventually resulted in another country succumbing to the Communist miasma with horrible genocide to follow. And that is just a tip of the iceberg; so, with all due respect, if you care about your children, you have to be concerned about politics, as boring, frustrating, or distasteful the subject may be; which brings me to my next argument.

One of my good friends recently confessed to me her severe disappointment with our political scene. Two party system is not working well at all, one candidate is worse than the other, everyone is corrupted to the extreme and long ago bought up by one lobby or the other, we did not have a decent president in about twenty years, people vote against someone rather than for someone, we are in a protracted war the reasons for which American public was not really informed. Couple of times, when I quoted from a political non-fiction book something that sort of made sense to me, her reply was that she does not really believe in it, since the person who wrote is was probably paid to write this anyway, and is just pursuing his or her agenda. Welcome to the murky, bottom feeding world of politics!

In my humble estimation, there are three basic ways of government: totalitarian, monarchy, and democracy. There are, of course, the variations on these themes, but the basics are limited to these options. I have spent seventeen years, six months, twenty one days, and a few hours (plus the usual gestation period before birth) under the totalitarian regime. All I can say in order to describe this paradise on earth is to use an old cliché about not wishing it on your worst enemy. A person living under a monarch could get lucky if the above mentioned monarch actually cares about his or her county and the people more than he or she cares about the fanfare and the prestige. None the less, the decent existence under a monarchy is basically a matter of chance (or rather Divine Providence). Only in a democracy does a person have a chance (albeit a relatively small one) to choose his or her governing body. This brings me to my next point.

Recently I got re-introduced to the famous quote by Lord Acton. Ironically, it happened while yours truly and a harassed lady from accounting were discussing the latest antiques of the big boss. I, being a nerd, quoted Acton. "Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men." That, in a nutshell, describes the entire political arena under any kind of government, even a democratic one. They all pursue their agenda; the question is: which agenda makes your live easier? If you get a choice, you usually choose the lesser of two evils, because politicians tend to be pretty evil by default. In my estimation, the last time the majority of the Americans voted for someone as opposed to against someone was in 1984; which brings us to the claim of twenty years of bad Presidents.

In my opinion, what he had was this: eight years of a horrendous President, four years of the President who could have done better, and almost eight years of the President who should have known better. For some unexplainable reason, Clinton is remembered by some as wonderful President who "had feelings for the little guy" and brought prosperity to the nation, and by others simply as uncontrollable Don Juan, but over wise pretty harmless. Ha! His uncontrollable tomcatting was actually the least of his problems; we are still paying for all his other "wonderful" acts; unfortunately, the full extent of the damage that he had inflicted on the country is yet to be uncovered. Bush Senior should not have done one thing (raise taxes like he promised), and should have done two: finish Saddam Hussein when he had a chance, and manage his re-election campaign better.

As for Bush Junior... His blunders may be many, and he was definitely "soft" a lot of times when he should have been firm, but his main mistake was in forgetting two simple facts: do not feed a crocodile because he will definitely bite off the feeding hand and do not expose your jugular to the jackals; because, let's face it, The Treason Lobby, oops, the present day Democratic Party plus the main media, which long ago prostituted themselves to the noble causes of America-hating, socialism, communism, and multiculturalism, definitely resembles both animals. One of my favorite political commentators rightly pointed out that if you look at the current President objectively, you see a decent man who was never involved in any major scandal, be it personal or political; he was faced with a tremendous challenge after 9/11, and was able to keep the county safe from another attack for the past seven years; but the media succeeded in making him into a blundering, helpless, pitiful idiot. Again, I am not blind to his mistakes; but the biggest one was trying to bend backwards and forwards in order to "breach the gulf with the other side"; all it got him were too many times in the L-formation, for the better kick from the benevolent "other side".

This brings me to my next argument: my voting Republican. Another one of my good friends pointed out recently that you cannot really be affiliated blindly with one party; you have to objectively look at each candidate and make an informed decision. Logical sentiment, aside from one small detail: the last two decent people in the government who had a letter D behind their names were Charlie Wilson and David Moynihan. That's it; for the description of the modern Democratic Party please see above. Last, but not the least, I vote for the Republican, as opposed to independent candidate, again due to the acquired cynicism: I would like the lesser of the two evils to actually win.

OK, introduction is over; now, let's concentrate on "Decision 2008". Personal confession: McCain was not my first, second, or even third choice. Like a true New Yorker, I was rooting for Giuliani; my other choices included Huckabee or Romney; but, once McCain won the official party nomination, he was my candidate of choice, because, as Burt Prelutsky pointed out, he personally will vote for any candidate with an R after his or her name, because, no matter their faults, we are guaranteed that they are still humans and not alien pods impersonating humans (meaning the coven with the letter D attached to them). So, somewhere in the middle of the year, we knew that the choice is between McCain, Clinton, and Obama; and the idiocy manifested itself once again. The big debate: is it more important for America to have a first woman President or a first black President? The fact that all we need to do, as always needed to do, is to choose a candidate better qualified for the job, somehow escaped the idiots on the left; never mind the fact that this woman is a woman strictly in the biological sense, and the black guy is only half black. Morons on the right, on the other hand, decided to assume, or rather, continue assuming, the position of outraged innocence, which they first assumed in 2006, surrendering the country to Nancy Pelosi in the bargain.

Their (the righties') reasoning went along two lines. Line one: Republican Party is getting thoroughly corrupt, the conservative principles are abandoned, so, we will not vote at all, thereby teaching Republicans that we are fed up with the lesser of two evils, and that they have to get their act together and return to conservative base. Wonderful, brilliant reasoning! Aside from the slight caveats: re-read the Acton's quote again, ergo politicians are and will remain politicians; and, if you do not vote, your opinion will not matter anymore, and the worse of two evils will prevail. Obviously, lesson not learned, since, immediately after McCain's victory in the primaries, the second line of reasoning emerged: this election is lost for the conservative base; let us begin to concentrate on 2012, where we most probably will emerge victorious, since Democratic candidate will probably win, country will reach a low point at the end of these four years, and the true conservative will emerge as the next strong President, rectifying whatever blunders were committed in the past four years. As Burt Prelutsky wonderfully summarized this, it is like wishing a lung cancer on the loved one, so he will quit smoking.

Allow me to just add this: as brilliant as Reagan was, he was unable to fix all the "blunders" of the four years of the Carter presidency, the biggest of which is about to threaten us with nukes; Busch Junior, while lacking Reagan's brilliance, has to deal with eight years of Clinton's "blunders", the full extent of which is, unfortunately, yet to come. Plus, as a county, we have already reached the low point, the tragedy of which is worse than all the oil crisis, stock market crashes, and financial meltdowns combined. We have reached it on a sunny, beautiful Tuesday morning seven years ago, when we were attacked on our own soil, by the enemy living amongst us, and using our own passenger airliners. The enemy murdered almost three thousand people, attacked and destroyed our second tallest building; attacked and partially destroyed our army headquarters!; and only brave actions of a handful of patriotic Americans prevented the enemy from reaching their final target, which was either the White House or the Capitol. And we could do nothing. NOTHING!!!!! Merciful Heavenly Father, please protect our country from reaching this or any other low point like this ever again!
And speaking of brilliance, another side note, which concerns my people. For those unfamiliar with our calendar, the Iraq war started in our month of Adar, around Purim. This is the time when we celebrate our miraculous escape from total annihilation and remember our constant battle with Amalek. The fact that the late, unlamented Saddam was a direct descendant of Amalek was never disputed in our learned circles. And, my receding memory lapses notwithstanding, I remember that Adar very clearly. Everyone felt energized: Amalek is being attacked in Adar, which must be a wonderful sigh; promises by hard-core Democratic voters to vote for Busch in gratitude for finally toppling Saddam; and, most importantly, significant shortage of suicide bombers in Israel, since that same Saddam was not available anymore to reward the grieving families with the requisite twenty five thousand ducats, sorry, dollars. Lo and behold, now we have to impeach Busch for starting this war; Saddam was a great guy who kept Iraq in check, ergo provided stability in the region; and my Dad was condescendingly informed that he would not support the war if his son was in the army; to which my Dad, G-d bless him, heatedly replied that he would have enlisted himself, if he was not so old. Go figure!

And speaking of war in Iraq in general terms: again, in my humble opinion, seconded by the opinions of more informed people, not only were we justified in starting this war, we would have already done with it, if not for the stupid idiocy of political correctness. If the army was allowed to do their job the way they see fit, the war would have been over some time ago, and would have cost us less casualties. Pacifists extend considerable efforts in order for this war to turn into second Vietnam; G-d willing, they would fail.

Back to our regular broadcast. Brilliant political scientist Susan Sarandon proclaimed that she is for Obama, and let us see what his position will be. Some time ago Zadornov made a joke to the tune that some politicians take his monologues as a plan of action. Apparently, big wigs at the Democratic Party have adopted the same approach: they would take their official line from their own court jesters: morons and America-haters from Hollywood. So, the official party/media line solidified: we would rather have a first black, rather than first woman. One logical argument was, of course, that Obama was the un-known factor, as opposed to Clinton, whose numerous shenanigans were well known; and the fun began. Hillary Rodham Clinton, so recently darling of the media and the race's favorite horse, so to speak, was submarined by her own party (including, of course, the party's call girls: the media). By the way, as a side note, a little memo to Hilary Clinton, Nancy Pelosi, and the rest of their coven: ladies, I agree with you to the tune that it is still a men's world; moreover, most men are just insensitive, oblivious jerks. Having said that, let us not exaggerate our accomplishments, because USA is the one country in the world where it is really great to be a woman, the above mentioned clueless guys notwithstanding. If you really want to talk about a woman succeeding in a men's world against all odds, please read something rudimentary about queen Elizabeth (not the current one). Here was one girl who succeeded in the men's world big time (using their arrogance and stupidity in the process); and, she, by the way, really loved her country and her people. She looked at her position as sacred responsibility handed to her by Heavens, and, believe it or not, made tremendous amount of personal sacrifices, in the process turning a crumbling country into a superpower. You, girls, on the other hand, look at politics exclusively in the terms of personal gratification and power hunger, and in the process are trying to turn a superpower into a crumbling country, G-d forbid. So, please do not harp to me about the presence of estrogen and progesterone as necessary ingredients for the candidates I am supposed to vote for.

Anyway, young, charismatic, appealing (although I personally think he is pretty ugly) Barak Hussein Obama emerged as the party's official nominee. In the process of this emergence, some very interesting tidbits of information began to creep up. For me, of course, he was not a choice to begin with, due to the reasons listed above. Plus, even if I took him personally, one thing disturbed me from the beginning: his refusal to wear American flag pin and to acknowledge the pledge of allegiance. Yes, I am not a complete nincompoop, and I recognize the political symbolism, but, none the less, there are certain things you just do not do when you are a US Senator. And then, the big fanfare: dear, wonderful, benevolent pastor Wright. Ironically, here is a personal parallel: my family belonged to the same congregation almost our entire life here, in US, which would just about make it twenty years. For most of these years, to my everlasting shame, I have managed to sleep through our Rabbi's speeches. The speeches are always very informative; I just have a tremendous accumulated sleep dept, which manifests itself at strange times. Despite my untimely naps, I was always aware of our Rabbi's political and religious views. So, Barak, dear friend, please do not tell me that after attending this blasted church for twenty years, being married by this guy, and having him baptize your two daughters, you were unaware of the fact that your pastor was a racist, anti-Semitic, anti-American loony. But that was not, in my eyes, Obama's biggest crime; it's what he decided to do in response to this story breaking out which still makes me want to vomit. This wonderful lover of the poor and downtrodden, this healer of the racial divide decided, oh so subtly, to trash his own grandmother on the national TV! And I am supposed to trust this guy to protect our country, when he cannot even be loyal to the person who raised him?

Then, of course, the more the merrier. His casual reference to the fact that we eat too much meat and keep our houses at 72 degrees, and the rest of the world not being OK with it. Of course, due to the efforts of the green brown shirts, we cannot afford to eat as much meat as we used to, and if they continue in the same vein, comfortable house temperatures will also disappear. But, still, why should we be answerable to the world about what we eat? His cynical reference to the small town people clinging to their racism, guns and religion. His lady fair, Michelle, claiming that this is the first time she is proud of this country: apparently, while she was attending the Ivy League schools on the affirmative action’s quota while screeching about inherent racism of this country, she did feel any kind of pride, or gratitude for that matter. Obama's connections with absolutely unrepentant former Weather Underground terrorists, who started him on his political career; his endorsement by HAMAS leaders; his connections to the convicted Chicago mobster: all this is being blatantly ignored by the crowds of adoring idiots. The list, of course, is much longer. As Sean Hannity recently pointed out, FBI would not be able to hire him after performing a background check.

Two things stuck in my memory about the Democratic convention: Barakopolis and thousands of American flags that were trashed as soon as the cameras were not pointed at them. Very telling. Then came the Republican convention, and the circus started again. First there were the reports of the local police officers raiding the homes of possible protesters and confiscating some very interesting stuff, body waste being the most notable. Forgive me, but how sick do you have to be in order to collect body waste in preparation for a protest? Needless to say, there were no similar reports before the Democratic convention. Then, as you remember, the first day of the convention corresponded with the hurricane. McCain showed humanity and pointed out that there is no place for fanfare when our citizens' lives are threatened. Media took this as Republican attempt to acquit themselves after Katrina. Acquit themselves for what? The act of G-d? The chocolate politicians squandering the money for about ten years instead of repairing the levees? The people ignoring the hurricane warnings and insisting on staying put? For chocolate people looting everywhere, attacking and raping their own chocolate sisters? But, of course, all these things were Republicans' fault, and Katrina was specifically designed against black people. On with the convention. Count me naive, but I love listening to speeches which end with "G-d bless all of you and G-d bless America"; and I know that thousands of American flags were not relegated to the trash heap after the convention. Did I agree with everything McCain said in his speech? Heck, no; but I was touched when he urged people to fight with him for our country.

Speaking of McCain: there were lots of snide remarks made to the tune of him being shot down in Vietnam as his only claim to fame. How many people knew before the convention that he had an opportunity to be set free as a son and grandson of important Navy people and refused it because he did not want to give enemy a chance to make a political spectacle out of him and be released before the people who were captives longer than him? For spoiled American brats, especially of the younger generation, it is all the same: we torture war prisoners, somebody else tortured ours. Yea, right! That, of course, is another long discussion. But try to just imagine, ungrateful brats, almost five more years of inhumane conditions and torture! That act of honour and courage alone shows McCain as a basically decent human being as opposed to his counterpart, who constantly feels it his duty to apologize for America to the rest of the world. Another convention revelation: how many people knew about Bridgett? I dare Michelle Obama to adopt a child of another race who needed lengthy and expensive medical treatment; but somehow I do not see her rushing to this dare, if Barak's own half-brother lives in poverty in Kenya on less than fifteen bucks a year. No, all that Michelle is capable of is donning a dress costing less than two hundred dollars, going on "The View", and there exposing herself again as a racist snob and nouveau riche harpy.

Now, let us briefly touch on the candidates for VP. Just one little fact about Biden: forget about his voting record, especially when it came to the matters pertaining to Israel, or his feet constantly sticking from his mouth, for which media long ago gave him a blank pass. Recently, old Russian dissidents published something very disturbing about Biden, but, since Russian dissidents are no longer in vogue, I doubt a lot of people paid attention to it. Apparently, back in 1979, our dear senator traveled to when USSR as a part of American delegation to discuss certain matters with Brezhnev. Secret memo by an important USSR politician surfaced, claiming Biden's unofficial announcement that USA is willing to ignore the matter of Russian dissidents as long as agreements are reached; that USA does not wish to spoil their relationship over this matter. Nice! And I am supposed to voluntarily put this guy in a position to potentially head this country?

As for Sara Palin, all I can say, aside from the fact that I loved her speech, is that the tremendous hypocrisy of the lefties is more glaring in her case than ever before. Savage media attacks, unbelievable sexism, idiotic nitpicking and investigations into minute and non-existing matters. What really made me laugh was the fact that she supposedly banned Harry Potter books from the public library in 1996. Could you people just check your facts before you lie so blatantly: "Philosopher's stone" was published in 1997! But, of course, Lenin's, Stalin's and Goebbels' mantra works very well: the more shameless the lie, the better is works, as long as you have Chutzpah to lie, well, shamelessly. Another thing that made me chuckle was this whole Jesus-community organizer-Pilate-governor thing. What I really adore in this is when this party of separation of church and state all of a sudden starts using religious similes. Of course, due to their ignorance of the religious matters, they usually come out that much more ridiculous. As for the lipstick thing, her promise was heard loud and clear: I will protect your children as fiercely as I protect mine; Obama, on the other hand, came out really looking like a pig.

Pat Buchanan recently called the media "camp followers". I rarely agree with this esteemed individual, but this time he had really nailed it. Obama was crowned as messiah and demy-god that could do no wrong; any and all criticism of this new deity is automatically shouted down as racism. All his shady connections to past and present terrorists, America and Israel haters, shady dealings and convicted felons are ignored. I mean, the guy stinks more than the yearly accumulation of cow manure after a strong rain, yet to millions and millions of screaming, half fainting morons he smells sweater than roses. "Change we can believe in"; oh, I can definitely believe in it; I just do not want it.

I do not believe in outlawing abortions for the simple reason that anything outlawed automatically creates organized crime around it. But to kill Born Again Act? It would take more than a monster to do that. Try reading some of Jill Stanek's articles; just be warned, they are not for the faint of heart; and then please explain to me how he could have listened to her testimony, killed that law, and then blithely told that those things are above his pay grade; only a heartless monster could do it.

"Spread the wealth"; why should the government rob us of our honestly earned money in order to expand the welfare state? And Barak, at least one time, put your money where your mouth is: how about helping your own bro before "volunteering" the rest of us for the charity of your choosing especially if it is not even in this country? And I still do not know if your charming lady wife finally decided to be proud of this country.

McCain, on the other hand, is a rich white guy, totally disconnected from the people. Of course he is; that was why he, albeit misguidedly, wanted to postpone the first presidential debate in order to return to the Senate and try to deal with the financial crisis. He does not know how many houses he had; sure, that is so horrible. Let me spell it out for you: do you know to the penny how much you have in all of your investment accounts? I personally never know exactly how much I have in my savings account at any given moment, or, for that matter, exactly how many books or Barbie dolls I possess, and, though by the grace of G-d I am not poor, rich I am definitely not. Yes, he is a rich guy; but what he said precisely was that he was not sure; he needed to check up on it. This is his wife's property, not his; gentlemen, do each one of you knew exactly, to the cent, what your wives possessed when you married them? Case closed.

Two more personal notes. One, there is one uneducated housewife who prays daily for the win of the McCain/Palin and the defeat of Obama/Biden. That woman is my mother; and I used that unflattering epithet in stupid sociological terms only, because everyone with a modicum of understanding knows what tremendous talents you need in order to raise four kids. Second: our Rabbi always makes two speeches on Yom Kippur, one in the beginning and one towards the end. This time, amongst other things, he made one simple suggestion: this was always a free country; let us pray that is continues to be so. Needless to say, my prayers go along the same lines.

One of my very dear friends, whom I like and admire very much, for some reason, decided that he supports Obama. Recently he made a joking remark that, while talking to his friends in Moscow, he told them to wait till November 4th; then, either they should come to him here (if Obama wins, G-d forbid from my side), or, if Obama loses, my friend is going to Russia to seek political asylum. Ha! Nothing could be further from the truth! This is the only country in the world where you could truly seek political asylum. And if, G-d forbid, Obama wins, there would be no place to seek political asylum anymore: just look at Jessica Hughes. That woman, a former Marine and a mother of three, had Secret Service show at her door, after she rebuffed an Obama staffer on the phone, telling her that she, Hughes, would not vote for Obama due to his support of the horrific baby-killing laws. Clintons were such babes in just sending IRS after their enemies! That one sends Secret Service right away, simply on the word of one of his volunteers. Paradise on earth!

I am not even going to delve in the current financial upheaval. Clinton's and Congressional Democrats' handiwork somehow, of course, thanks again to the camp followers, ended up being the fault of the Republicans in general and Busch's Administration in particular. The cure for most of our financial woes, as always in my opinion, is pretty simple: enough taxes and government interference. Free market should be free of those first and foremost; then we will bounce back in absolutely no time. But, with all due respect to ordinary people experiencing financial difficulties, please remember one thing: as much or as little as you have in terms of wealth, you cannot really enjoy it if you are not free, or, G-d forbid, dead. As Burt Prelutsky very nicely put it, if Al Qaida levels Empire State Building or Iran drops a nuke, nobody would remember who the heck Paulson or Bernake are or were. That, by the way, is the first and the most important function of the government: the protection of its citizens, and not the free education, free health care, or involuntary wealth redistribution.

Every tyrant, every terrorist, every miscreant, every bastard son of a whoremonger on the international political scene, be he big or small, is waiting with baited breath for Obama to win; then they can move in their final plans for the destruction of the Big (and in the bargain the Small) Satan. And the only people who stand between that tragedy and the United States are an old Vietnam Vet, a young moose hunting mother of five from a little town in Alaska, and every American citizen still in possession of his or her thinking faculties. My friends, this is really no time to impersonate Childe Harold. Get your butts to the voting booths! It does not matter if you live in a swing state or not; every vote counts! You actually have no idea, but you plus five of your world-weary twenty something friends could actually swing the votes! This country is the last remaining bastion of freedom; let it continue to be that way! Not only tyrants, but all the political dissidents, all the freedom fighters around the world look to this country with hope, as yours truly once longingly looked at the now destroyed Twin Towers in her mind, hoping one day to be free. May G-d bless America!

YET ANOTHER LATE RESPONSE

On the Rules of Engagement

A little while ago, when I remembered the strange reconnection I had with one of my former friends, Subwife asked how come it's all right, in my opinion, when conservatives call liberals stupid, but not all right when the situation is reversed; doesn't that smack of double standard? Posed like this, it is a very interesting topic for discussion, so, here goes.

First of all, let us identify the players. On one hand, we have the group that calls themselves liberals, and so, by default, everyone else started calling them liberals also. That definition, of course, could not be further from the truth, because that particular group represents the most malevolent and freedom-suppressing force ever to arise on American political scene. Overwhelming amount of these people possesses a very interesting set of morals and a firm believe that all the personal liberties enumerated in American Constitution apply to them exclusively; and, as the irony of fate would have it, since the majority of media is controlled by them, our conscious and subconscious minds are constantly being bombarded with direct and subliminal messages to the tune that only that peculiar set of morals is "true morals" and these people are true defenders of our Constitutional rights and freedoms.

On the other hand we have an opposing bunch, whose members are, again by default, identified as conservatives; and, again, that is not precisely so. As I mentioned before, they are pretty diverse crew by themselves, coming from all kinds of political thought and political school; the only thing that unites them is the opposition to the so called liberals, but that does not necessarily make them conservatives, and a lot of them are not: just look at Tammy Bruce. So, what we have in a nutshell are basically people on the left and all the rest, who are usually on the right and sometimes in the center. Out of consideration for my fingers I will simply call them lefties and righties in this here composition.

Now, in the normal, civilized course of political argument nobody, obviously, calls their opponents names and nobody raises his or her voice. You present your opinion, your opposition presents theirs, and hopefully, both of you have substantiating evidence. At a certain point you realize that both of you feel too strongly about the topic discussed and you will not convince each other to switch opinions. So, you politely agree to disagree, smile, and either wish each other good evening or switch the discussion to flighty New York weather, or Yankees, or latest movie, or Agatha Cristie, or ballet, or Paris Hilton (hopefully, you and your opponent have some other interests aside from latest development on the political scene). That scenario, again, works perfectly well if you are dealing with civilized people who, at a certain point in their development, were taught at least a modicum of proper manners. Unfortunately, when you are dealing with lefties, that is usually not the case.

These people, both the leaders and the followers, are firmly convinced that they took over Pope's ability to be infallible, and that they, and they alone, possess all the right answers and all the secrets of the universe. Freedom of speech belongs exclusively to them; all the members of the opposition are reactionaries, members of the right-wing conspiracy, racists, etc, and, as such, are not entitled to express their opinion in any shape or form. Moreover, your belonging to the opposition (again, in any shape or form) automatically makes you stupid, or, at the very least, uneducated and uninformed. Here are some snippets from my personal experience.

Holiday lunch at a friend's house. Usual (for her) motley assembly. Conversation zigzags around strange topics, and yours truly pipes something in defense of McCarthy, followed by immediate and predictable outrage from another guest. "You really should read up on the topic" goes her superior advice down her nose. "I just did it few months ago". "Really?" with disbelieve.

Election day. I am chatting with one of my friendlier co-workers. He is totally confused as for whom to vote and asking my advice. I confess that I vote down the party line exclusively for Republicans, so, I am not necessarily an unbiased adviser. Another woman from a different department is passing by. "You vote for Republicans? How dare you! You would not be allowed into my house!"

Another friendly co-worker sets me up with a blind date. The guy has a promising political career working as an underflunkie to some kind of councilman (Democrat, of course). As irony would have, that was around February of another Presidential election year, and, of course, he wanted to find out what candidate appealed to me. The moment I mentioned my party affiliation, he became extremely condescending and downright nasty, mocking every single opinion I had on any subject and leaching on to every single little scrap of information that I did not know and he did. Let's just say it was a most memorable date.

So, basically, lefties usually view righties as stupid by default; righties usually call lefties stupid (and some other choice names) after thorough study, interesting evidence and long experience (like happened in my case). Unfortunately, the battle lines are much deeper than that. Saul Alinksy, whom some biographers of our dear Hilary Rodham Clinton call her spiritual mentor, basically taught his followers to use the bourgeois mentality of their opponents and make a complete mockery of it. Here is a charming example I found in one of Barbara Olsen's books: Alinsky instructed his goons to eat beans and then go protest some kind of meeting (do not remember which one, but it was inside a closed room) and basically distract the said meeting with excessive flatulence. How, may I ask you, are you supposed to remain civilized when dealing with such opponents?

Just think about it: in a few decades since the sixties (which is a very short period of time, historically speaking), lefties have taken over tremendous chunks of American life, education being the most crucial of them. Freedom of speech belongs exclusively to them; political correctness is chocking everyone else. From the leftie's point of view, there is no respect for the enemy: he has to be yelled at, yelled down, deprived of his ability to express the said opinion, and hopefully deprived of his livelihood. Meanwhile, we are supposed to remain civilised and bleat at all and sundry that these people do not adhere to the rules of civilized behavior and gentleman's fighting code? In my humble opinion, one of the reasons lefties have such virulent hatred towards Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter particularly is because these two engaged them at their own battlefield and emerged triumphant, never mind very popular.

In my long association with lefties there was only one person with whom I could speak about politics and not loose my cool. She was also a former co-worker, by the way. When she felt that the discussion was entering dangerous waters , she would just propose to agree to disagree and jokingly add that that is why we have vanilla ice cream and chocolate ice cream. The taste that was left in my mouth after discussions with all the other lefties I have either known on a personal level or just encountered in strange situations usually did not resemble ice cream, either vanilla or chocolate. The saddest part of all? Time for discussions has past long time ago. We are in the middle of a very serious fight. Our freedom, the future of our children, and the future of this country are at stake, never mind the the decline and almost total non-existence of polite behavior.

GHOST OF MY RECENT PAST, REVISITED

Even though, as mentioned before, I am not the most sociable person in the world, over the years I have managed to acquire a certain number of friends and good acquaintances. The goodly number of those, fortunately or unfortunately, are not on my social horizon anymore for a number of reasons.

A couple of years ago, another person whom I considered a friend, joined those ranks. I am not going to go into painful details: that is not the point of this story. Let us just say that we parted company on civil terms, even hugged each other, but that was it. No phone calls, e-mails, text messages; not even Rosh Hashana or Birthday cards. Sure, we have seen each other a few times, thanks to mutual acquaintances, but the conversations were always brief and shallow.

Fast forward to about two weeks ago; here I am, going through my OCD routine of checking all my e-mail accounts every few hours. When I got to the one I reserve for family use only, there was one new message from my sister with a very strange subject line: Ann Coulter. I opened it, frantically trying to figure out which of the kids caused my sister's strange mind set, because she has never before supplied me with any headlines of political nature; that is usually my modus operandi. After a quick scan of this unusual missive I realized that my sister did not, after all, smoke any strange substances; all she did was forward a message, which, you guessed it, was from that lost friend. The message contained a Youtube link with a short missive saying that he remembered Barb used to be a die hard fan of that woman and maybe now she will change her mind.

Zhvanetsky had a wonderful expression, which, loosely translated, means: " I dare not say it in harsh words, but there are no words to say it softly". Of all the things he felt compelled to say to me after all this time, all the news we could have shared, this was the only one thing he wanted to make sure I knew? To be perfectly honest, I got really peeved, and when I am peeved I start to dwell on all the not so good stuff about the peever, not just that one particular episode. For whatever reason, he always thought he is more mature, informed, sophisticated, and experienced than yours truly, so he probably decided that I never saw or heard about the stupid incident and decided to enlighten me (not bothering to remember my e-mail address and using a convenient messenger). That was my reasoning; but after a few minutes I lightened up and just chucked the whole thing to the great irony called life in general and human nature in particular.

That evening my sis and I had a short discussion about this and came to the conclusion that the whole thing could be summarized by vernacular expression "peeing in your pants". I asked her to forward him my blog link and was informed that he already had it; case closed (or so I thought).

Fast forward a couple more days; another discussion with my sister in between kids demanding their dues and us trying to swallow dinner. Apparently, next time he saw her, he wanted to know if Barb was informed about the great earthquake. When he, in turn, was informed that not only did Barb know about it hot off the press, but she already left her opinion in her blog, which he could check at his convenience, the response was: "I already checked that blog. Are you sure it is only Barb's, because half the entries do not sound like her at all?" Another "pants" moment, plus, I got genuinely perplexed. What entries did not sound like me? If anything sounds one hundred percent like me, it is this blog.

The wondering went on for couple more days, till my sister run into him again. Again: does Barbie know all the facts? Yes, she does. Check her blog. I checked and I disagree. Fine, leave a comment; her blog allows anonymous comments. Then comes this masterpiece of an argument: I disagree, plus Barbie makes spelling mistakes (at which point my wonderful sis just hung up on him). Oy gevalt! First thing that struck was that he, of all people, knows that I am dyslexic and I can not, for the life of me, proof-read my own work. Plus, I never pretended to be a specialist in English grammar, spelling, or punctuation. Unlike him, who was lucky enough to come here when he was a kid, I came when I was technically a high school graduate. My official education in English language consists of two semesters of ESL with a bunch of Iranian ladies, three semesters of English composition at "Dura" college, and the guilty pleasure of about six hundred romance novels. He knows that, even if he does not remember. Then came the realization of the ultimate irony: he acted exactly as Ann Coulter described! When liberals have no more arguments, they call you stupid. In all fairness to my former friend, he did not call me stupid; he just attacked my English proficiency, which still does not negate the validity of what I have to say, just makes the whole thing even more ironic.

Aside from irony, this thing really made me sad, because, bad times aside, I also remembered all the shared coffee and confidences, all the crazy shots I have of him doing goofy things, him driving us after our Mom's cancer surgery, running errands after our Gran passed away, both of us steaming the pleats on my sister's wedding gown, him saving my foot from a trip to ER, and, most important, introducing us to Bond girls. Aw, well! To paraphrase my former tutors' three year old son, "Life!"