The Best Motto

Gd, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannon change
Courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.

All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

You woke up this morning - Congratulations! You got another chance!

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

OLDEST GIRL BY ANY OTHER NAME...

I spent most of the past summer in Israel.  And, since I periodically complain about the monotony and boredom that is my life, Fate decided to show me once again the meaning of that old Chinese proverb and thrust me in the middle of the "interesting time".  Allow me to elaborate.

You see, my arrival into the Holy Land coincided with the kidnapping of Eyal, Naftali, and Gilad (may The Heavenly Father avenge their blood), so I was in the think of it all - including the "conflict".  Let me tell you: it is one thing to know about the South of Israel being under constant rocket attacks - and quite another to actually feel a portion of it yourself; this was definitely a case of nothing beating personal experience.

But my short story is not about the war and the rocket fire; it is about my wonderful niece, Mini Beloved Sibling, who at that time was eight and a half.

As a mentioned many times before, she and her siblings are normal kids: which means they fight - a lot.  But when push comes to shove and something bad is threatening them, they come together - and MBS shows time and again that she is a worthy member of the club.  Three episodes from that summer stuck in my mind.

The first one happened one night when we decided to put them all to sleep in the mamad (the fortified room in the apartment that serves as a bomb shelter).  So, Curly had to share the bed with Fluffy (her younger sister).  Ordinarily, there would have been no end of complains: she is kicking me; I am uncomfortable; why do I have to share a bed with her; she is taking too much space; ect., etc., etc.  But that night our big girl came through - she just found a comfortable position and went to sleep without a peep.

The second one also happened at night - but at that time they were not sleeping in the mamad when the siren went off.  So, MBS jumped out of her mother's bed (where she was allowed to be to protect the peace, so to speak), and immediately went into action.   "Mommy, the Baby!" - she wanted to make sure that her newborn sister was safe.  Then she darted into her room and saw that her brother was peacefully sleeping on the top of the bank bed.  "SiM!  SiM is sleeping on top! We need to wake him!"  It took a little while for my sister to actually calm her down and send her to mamad with a promise that her brother would be taken care of - the same brother with whom she fights daily; scratch that - hourly!

And the third episode occurred when I took the Munchkins to the concert at the local equivalent of a community center. Here we were, enjoying a funny guy who could play music on practically anything - buckets, bottles, strings, bottle covers...and then the siren went off.  Curly jumped out of her chair, run to the front of the audience where her one year old sister was sitting on the floor, grabbed her, foisted her on her hip for a better grip, and then turned to me: "Papi, where do we run?!"

As I sit here typing this, I still get chocked up.  May the Heavenly Father guard you and your loving heart, our beautiful little girl!

Sunday, March 08, 2015

MORNING UPDATE - February 28, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! It's sunny and freezing outside - Phil, you are very lucky that you are not easily accessible by NY public transportation! 
Yet another person recently inquired if our felines are a special breed - because they are so huge. Nope, just American-food-available-in-great-quantities-mutts variety. Psychotic, but still mutts, er, American short hair, that is.
The crazy upstairs is warming up with her usual.
Currently trending at #1 is Janet Jackson - because the rumors about her divorce are "not true". I guess she is still ecstatically happy with her muslim husband.
Trending at #2 is Jada Pinkett Smith - because she "Flaunts Fuller Figure". Considering her usual size, that's not a great achievement - not top 2 anyway.
Trending at #7 is Jeff Goldblum - as he is "back for Independence Day 2". I wonder from whom they will be saving the world this time - as, considering Hollywood's general trends, the obvious targets would not be used.
Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are engaged - wow! What a surprise - we so did not see this one coming!
"How to dress for Oscars" - the more skin shows, the better (only for women, of course).
R-Patz got himself a new favorite co-star - and it's a cow (literally)!
"Cook dinner in a coffee pot" - OK, how small is your apartment already?!!
Washington, DC, is considered "the most literate city" in the US - did you sneak to Denver first before pronouncing that?!!!
Dr. Seuss went to Dartmouth and was caught drinking in his dorm during Prohibition - well, that's amusing to know.
And, finally, our dear city reportedly has 136,000 potholes - let's see how long it would take our dear, poor people loving mayor, to repair them.
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - February 27, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! Well, it was sunny, then snowing, then sunny again - and, of course, another "severe weather advice", this time about very cold temperatures and extra strong winds.
George likes to sit on my desk, especially on the spot usually reserved for my laptop. Sniff found himself a new relaxing position - balancing between the cat house and the radiator.
The crazy upstairs is - well, you know.
Yesterday horrified a costumer by offering him Tom Sawyer as a great, "gender-neutral" book to teach to a class of ten-year olds.
The Di Blasio voters continue to experience buyer's remorse - as he is planning to evict 3 charter schools from their space in the public schools. One of those schools happens to be in Harlem - so much for the bleeding heart for the poor.
Sandra Bullock is trending at #8 - because it looks like she would make 70 mil for Gravity. Well, as long as she does not join the "rich do not pay enough taxes" crowd, let her enjoy them (the money, that is).
According to latest reports, juicing can help you ward off colds and flu - wow! How original!
Robin Thicke's wife is "smiling after the split" - well, why not?
"Bieber's booking video released by prosecutors" - whoever wants to watch it has way too much time on his hands.
And, finally, Will and Kate are still looking for a new nanny.
Coffee this morning in my Get A Grip mug.

MORNING UPDATE - February 26, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! It's nice and white outside yet again - but at least we are secure in knowing that this year Phil was right. I tried to do a preemptive strike and feed George before he starts complaining, but no dice - he is ignoring his food and getting ready to whine. Sniff is in his demented horse mood - running around like crazy.
The crazy upstairs does not leave her post for anything.
Yesterday came to work to a prominent display of Rush's book - because yet another one of his is coming out soon.
Also yesterday the rumors were flying that our humble establishment was visited by Chris Noth - and I horrified my co-workers by telling them that I despise the dude (and not for his Mr. Big performance).
"How to go from brunette to blonde" - discussion of Julia Roberts and her hair. Nah, thanks, I am staying brunette.
"2 ways to apply blush" - silly me, only applying it one way.
Robin Thicke and wife split - duh! What took her so long?
"Reasons to drink red wine" - why should there be reasons?
Kaley Cuoco has a pet peacock - is he as psychotic as my pets?
Girl Scouts in Colorado are forbidden to sell their cookies outside the pot dispensaries - why?!!! It's a perfect set-up!
And, finally, considering the fact that our boys lost the final hockey match to the Canadians, it looks like we might have to keep Bieber for a while - but, guys, I don't hold it against you. You beat the Russians! After that, I can deal with Bieber for another period of time.
Coffee this morning in my Aruba mug.

MORNING UPDATE - February 21, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! It's still warm! Although there was a "severe fog advisory" for our area (over-rated, by the way), and later in the week there would be more snow - yippee. I don't remember ever washing that many socks for myself at one time - I mean, never before!
This time they had NBS on - blessedly on low, but then another customer showed up, carrying a non-stop phone conversation in a very booming voice. I mean, no peaceful laundry for yours truly, ever!
Sniff was doing his horse, er, cat race routine earlier today, and George is warming up my freshly washed bedding.
The crazy upstairs is at her post.
Currently trending at #4 is mumps outbreak at Fordham - because, you know, vaccinations are evil or something.
Trending at #2 is Mila Kunis, who shared details of her date with Ashton Kutcher. OK, Valentine's is over, unless people need some lame tips for the next year.
Trending at #6 is Lena Dunham - because "she lays smackdown on Jezabel" after that august publication offered ten gs for unretouched images of Dunham's photoshoot for Vogue. Lady, relax - you are an independent, free, empowered woman. So, who cares what you look like without makeup and Photoshop?
Courtney Cox is at #8 due to her vacationing in Venice with her daughter and her new boyfriend. Personally, I would just go to Aruba - alone!
Christina Aguilera is pregnant again - good luck to her future kid!
Bieber's mom can sing - can she also control her idiot offspring?
And, finally, a Welsh artist painted Kate's portrait using food spread and toast.
Coffee this morning in my white glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - February 20, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The sun was out today! Combined with above-freezing temperatures! Wow! Unfortunately, too much snow on the ground for flip flops. Sniff still sleeps on the radiator. George finally abandoned his huge Amazon box, and we were finally able to get rid of it.
The crazy upstairs is up to her usual.
Currently trending at #1 is Kimora Simmons - because she "Secretly Married Goldman Sachs Banker". Interesting pairing - and definitely earth-shattering news.
President Bush misses Air Force One, because in 8 years they never lost his luggage - and I miss a President who loved our country and had a nice sense of humor.
Ex-DEA chief claimed that "legal pot is a disaster" - well, duh! With all due respect, I don't think he would be the best person to ask, not being a, well, neutral party to the debate. Meanwhile, the pot tax revenue in Colorado is "higher than expected" - so, duh again!
Tax fraud is on the rise, because, "it's too hard to get caught" doing it - wow! Simply brilliant! Of course IRS has no time or manpower to hunt fraudsters - they are too busy persecuting the enemies of the regime.
"Why US needs Kerry" - what the hell were you smoking before coming up with that headline?
A judge in Miami-Dade county is trying to figure out whenever or not to release all or parts of the video of Biber's arrest - Miami-Dade county has no bigger judicial concerns than Bieber?
And, finally, Prince Charles performed a traditional "spirited Saudi sword dance" - why is this dude still running around instead of dancing in a nice quite padded cell somewhere?
Coffee this morning in my Disney Bean Plush mug with Mickey and Friends.

MORNING UPDATE - February 19, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! The weather is in the 40s - be still, my heart! This winter was so bad that it finally killed a sweater of mine that I had since the first Clinton administration. I also run out of socks this week, and had to borrow some from Baby Bro. But at least nobody can attack Phil this time around as he did predict a long end of winter and a cold spring.
My roomie got himself a new bed - so the space under it is a new territory to relax in, to claim for, and to fight on for our feline companions.
The crazy upstairs is non-stoppable.
Another person who decided to write a kiddie book - Ringo Starr.
Currently trending at #1 is Lamar Odom - who is "heading to Spain to escape Kardashian clan". We, unfortunately, are not so lucky.
Trending at #2 is Jason Biggs - because he and wife "welcomed baby boy". Good luck to the kid not discovering his daddy's body of work.
Meryl Streep is currently at #6 - as being "grateful for 18th Oscar nomination". Don't worry, Meryl, if you do an anti-gun movie as promised, you will get about 3 Oscars for that one; guaranteed.
"J. Lo.'s risque look shocks and delights" - oh, give me a break! After that green number she wore at the Oscars back in 2000 she has a hard time beating her own record.
"Gun club for liberals" - that's something I did not see before. Apparently, they "love guns, but hate NRA's conservative agenda". As always, liberal brain matter shines through.
New study shows that lonely people "face elevated blood pressure and other health issues" - how come my blood pressure calms when I am alone and not forced to deal with human idiocy?
"Sharon Stone's aging crisis" - how about volunteering at the nursing home? That would cure fretting about turning 56.
"Worst week to call IRS" - there is actually a good week?!!
"US running short on clowns" - of course we are! All the clowns escaped to DC!
And, finally, a bank in Italy has a vault capable of holding 440,000 heads of Parmesan - I love Italians.
Coffee this morning in my stripped glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - February 7, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! It's below freezing again, but sunny. Some kind of brave bird is singing outside. Sniff briefly hugged the pipe again last night, but then stopped - improved weather report? Lately he likes to sleep on top of my romance boxes. George discovered a new box for himself - so maybe we would be able to finally get rid of his giant Amazon box.
The crazy upstairs got some competition from the outside.
According to Men's Health, watching too much porn impedes memory capabilities - is that why guys have to be reminded ten times that they promised to do something?
Currently trending at #1 is Ryan Phillippe - because he and Reece just sold "shared Los Angeles investment property" even though they have been divorced for 7 years. Oh, the trials and tribulations of rich and famous....
Trending at #2 is Kelly Ripa - because she had to go without make up after loosing the Superbowl bet. Kelly, you should have used something less important as a collateral.
"Biden hints at 2016 run" - at least this one is going to be entertaining.
"Escaping US taxes not as easy as some think" - well, duh!
"Prosecutor gets Justin Bieber egging probe evidence; decision nears" - really do not envy that prosecutor.
And, finally, Kate is writing a forward to "a collection of stories penned by the wives of Royal Air Force servicemen" - cool.
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - February 6, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! It's freezing again outside, but at least the sun is shining. Sniff keeps trying to join Baby Bro for a smoking break. Yesterday he also wanted to help us unload groceries from the car, and later Sniff and George both played mashgichim for the pantry packing.
Recently got another costumer who for some insane reason thought I would love to hear her talk in Russian.
Currently trending at #2 is Brad Pitt - whose latest family photos with Angelina and the brood we are privileged to see if we so desire; I personally don't.
Trending at #8 is Dwayne Johnson as he is beginning to shoot "new TNT reality series" - sometimes I am grateful that at present I don't have TNT.
Emma Watson painted a "stunning self portrait" - as long as she stays out of politics, I don't care what else she does with her free time.
"Not all of the bathrooms in Sochi are awful" - that headline alone is priceless.
"Even Walmart is too pricey for some Americans" - once again, comrade Hussein, thank you for that!
Selena Gomez spent 2 weeks in rehab for "emotional trauma" - aw, poor little famous brat! When the rest of us suffer from "emotional trauma", we still have to wake up every morning and carry on as if nothing happened.
"Valentine's gifts you definitely won't get this year" - how in blazed do you know what I will and won't get?
"Ashton Kutcher, Charlie Sheen trade harsh words" - I wish both of them would just go away, but I know it's not going to happen any time soon.
"How to watch Olympics" - well, you pick up your remote control, put the TV and cable box on, find the channel that broadcasts it, and watch.
"The most frequently overlooked tax breaks" - not crossing the current administration must top the list.
"Justin Bieber parties on" - gee, what a surprise!
Coffee this morning in my huge Disney Pooh and Friends mug.

MORNING UPDATE - February 5, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! Our fair city is plagues by both the results of the catastrophic global warming and the latest mayoral elections. I was also informed yesterday that by denying global climate change I am denying science.
Sniff is not hugging the pipe yet, which means it's not so cold. George got a hefty doze of catnip last night in order to make him pipe down. He still complained for about an hour, after which we realized that it was his OCD striking again - his fountain was not filled to the brim, hence George was thirsty.
The crazy upstairs is at her post.
Snooki's new baby book is out.
Jennifer Lawrence used to be a model for Abercrombie - interesting, very interesting.
A professor in Austin sold his possessions and is relocating to a dumpster in order to teach environmental science - um, dude, there are pills available for what ails you.
Zuckerberg is not planning to have kids in the near future - sigh of relief for the kids.
"Really bad advice from romantic comedies" - who the hell is taking advice from that?!!
The Queen ordered Kate to "lower her hemlines" - wow! When did she visit BP?
Coffee this morning in my white glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - FEBRUARY 4, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! The horrendous effect of anthropogenic global warming continue to plague our fair city (incidentally, FB does not recognize the word "anthropogenic" - oh, the irony!). Yours truly also continues to impress - yesterday a woman in Greenwich Village was horrified upon gazing at my bare calves towering over my Hot Socks and Baby Bro's snow boots.
Also, students do not make good snow plowers.
George continues to show signs of his OCD by refusing to drink from his fountain unless it is full to the brim. Sniff continues to demolish my hot pink flippies.
Heidi Murkoff also wrote a book called something like What to Expect When Mommy is Expecting a Baby - did not yet have a chance to see the sales records on this one. Fergie (the former princess, not the singer) wrote a children's book against bullying.
Currently trending at #8 is Britney Spears - because she met up with Lady Gaga in Vegas. Nevada's latest freak show, Harry Reid non-withstanding?
"Gwen Stefani's 'chunky' teeth photo irks fans" - wow, the problems some people have.
Miley Cyrus "wants to let girls know it's OK to be themselves" - really?!!!!
"Scary things caffeine can do to your body" - not as scary as the results of listening to this constant rigmarole.
According to the latest poll, DC is #10 of "the least religious" states in the country - really? Somebody needs to check their raw data - because no way are there 9 states that can beat DC in this area.
Kathy Ireland was proclaimed the #1 of SI swimsuit models, with Kate Upton at #2 and Heidi Klum at #5 - gentlemen, let the battle of opinions begin!
And, finally, rumor has it that The Queen wants Kate to "tone it down a bit" (meaning her wardrobe), but, as Kate's style "already evolved", the point seems to be moot - lady, with all due respect, just concentrate on really important stuff, like maybe Kate's papa in law.
Coffee this morning in my Harry Potter mug - the new version.