The Best Motto

Gd, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannon change
Courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.

All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

You woke up this morning - Congratulations! You got another chance!

Sunday, June 30, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Sunday! Shavua Tov! Wishing all of you a great week! The weather is - oh, hell, it's summer!
Baby Bro decided to have some fun: he got a new cat toy (which Sniffles loved) and also a special cat harness so that we may be able to take them out for walks. Dad decided to take the bull by the horns (or, rather, Sniff in his arms), and took him out this morning - unfortunately, home videos are not available.
History Channel is "profiling" America's favorite foods instead of Food Network - always fun. In case you are wondering which one is #1, it's burgers. And now they moved from 10 foods to 10 amazing weapons - got to love The History Channel!
Trending at #8: "Pride Parade 2013" - otherwise known as freaks and deviants infesting Manhattan.
Trending at #6: Twinkies, which are due to return to the shelves in July 15 - up yours, unions!
Miley Cyrus is "obsessed" with short shorts - obsession obviously stays below the neck.
"Justin Bieber's 6 Hottest Hookup Rumors" - only 6? That's good news - means less idiot girls are going crazy about him.
The first photo of Kim after giving birth was of her (Kim) taking a nap - I am sure she never looked smarter.
"Three Ingredient Spaghetti Sauce" - I should really start hosting my own cooking show because I can give you at least 4 such sauces.
Justin Timberlake is trending at #2 because he announced that he and his wife Jessica Biel are planing kids soon - congratulations! Definitely headline-worthy stuff!
And, speaking of parenthood: Channing Tatum claims that he was crying while watching his baby being born - aw, how sweet.
Coffee this morning in my glass Cappuccino mug.

Friday, June 28, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! The weather is - well, whatever, it's summer, so I have to brace myself for the next 3 months. Thank The Good Lord for a/c!
The crazy upstairs is doing her crazy thing, which now includes schlepping furniture back and forth.
George woke me up this morning demanding to be petted, and is now sleeping on my bed. Sniff is in the cat house - he recently woke up from his nap, stretched, sent a few disdainful looks in my direction, and went back to sleep.
In honor of the Harry Potter's 15th Anniversary, Scholastic unveiled a new cover for the Prisoner of Azkaban - the series are fantastic and unique without any idiotic illustrations, especially The Prisoner, Scholastic!
Beyonce posted a bunch of pictures of her daughter, and the public is fascinated by baby's designer shoes - aw, how sweet and spittoon worthy!
Alyssa Milano is currently trending at #1 because she "Looks Amazing At Age 40 On The Cover Of Maxim" - great accomplished!
Sylvester Stallone is currently trending at #3 because he is teaming up with Arnold once again - and not to try and deprive us of our 2nd Amendment rights, mind you, but actually to do their primary job and collaborate on the new movie.
"Sandra Bullock flaunts surprising skill" - she is fluent in German. Usually, I would wonder if that was a slow news day so this one got a special headline, but I know that we have not been lacking for news in at least half a year, so, what gives?
Out of top ten US cities for car thefts, seven are located in sunny California - so, it's a land of fruits, nuts, and car thieves. My long-ago decision not to move there looks more and more appealing.
Coffee this morning in black glass from Target.

Thursday, June 27, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather is - well, it's summer in New York, hell damn fart!
Sniff was running around last night - which he stopped doing since the beginning of the heat wave. He also got a new box - courtesy of Amazon selling 36 rolls of toilet paper (no need to worry about local barbarians stealing it). So, this morning Sniff was familiarizing himself with the new toy. And now both of them are sleeping in my room in their usual designated spots.
Someone finally switched the TV in our laundromat from ABC to Nick Jr. - and as much as Nick Jr. is a bunch of stupidity, the ability of not seeing the moronettes on the View is vastly appealing.
According to Ina, you can't make meringues in rainy or humid weather - it's sunny and clear, ladies! Let's make meringues! Because that's the first thought that pops into your mind on sunny and clear day!
Happy Birthday, Dobby! I wish your spirit would rub off on people from my step-mama country who can't appreciate the freedom they were granted!
Emma Watson claims that she owns only 8 pair of shoes - give me a break! Even I have that much! That stunning revelation, by the way, came after Emma was supposedly shocked when she saw the contents of Paris Hilton's closet. Who cares about the contents of either of their closets?!!!
Gwyneth Paltrow is trending at #3 because she was "flaunting" her "hot body" in "sexy lingerie" - at least she was not advising anyone on government policy.
Stanford, CA was proclaimed the smartest city in the US - New York did not make the list. But what surprises me the most is that any place from California made it on this list to begin with.
Kristen Bell proposed to the father of her baby via Twitter - aw, how sweet! Apparently, she could only do that after DOMA "was struck down" - what is it, another idiocy a la Brad Pitt?
Kris Jenner showed the picture of baby Kim, and even haters have to agree that she was an adorable baby - almost all babies are adorable, idiots! Unfortunately, that rarely translates into adulthood.
A farmer in Washington is feeding his pigs pot - the craving for bacon among some of the people I know just intensified 
Justin Bieber's monkey is about to be released from quarantine in the German Zoo - unfortunately, the Bieber itself not quarantined from the general population.
And, finally, the renovations on Kensington Palace that were done in anticipation of Kate's baby cost British taxpayers around 1.5 million bucks - hum, Brits, if you think that's a lot of lettuce, do you want to exchange? We could send you Hussein and Michelle, and you can send them on vacations, and we will pay for Will and Kate's house.
Coffee this morning in my white glass from Target.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! We are officially experiencing the first heat wave of the summer - @#%&! 
Yesterday I realized that one of my dear pets scratched my face while I was sleeping - George is the likely suspect since he spends more time on my bed, but Sniff is not off the hook either. Last night George again slept with me, while Sniff slept on my office chair. Now they are sleeping again - George on my bed, and Sniff in the cat house.
Food Network and Cablevision finally fixed up their computers, so they don't say that there is Paula Deen on when in reality it's someone else. Also, they (Food Network) claim that after you open a bottle of wine, you really have to finish it within a day, or it will go bad - I guess they never visited my house.
ION keeps showing Mercury Rising - curioser and curiouser.
Emma Watson claimed that she did not really realized how famous she was till she went to college - she needed a college education for that? Wow!
Snooki is sharing her workout photos with us - thank you, I will skip.
Miley claims her wedding plans are still on - good luck to you, and especially to any and all progeny!
"Celebrities with half-shaved heads" - another one I really don't need to see.
"Haircuts that work best for round faces" - just ask my sister to give you a cut, or go to my hairdresser in Midtown.
A crazy couple in Connecticut could not settle on a name for their unborn baby, so they asked costumers in local Starbucks - the result beat North West by a long shot.
And, finally, "Kate Middleton is being called on to breast feed the royal baby to set an example for new moms everywhere" - idiots galore.
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.

Tuesday, June 25, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! The weather is triple H once again - summer is here. George was hunting for the birds outside of one window earlier today, and Sniffles was investigating the view from the other one. Now they are both sleeping in my room in the usual spots: George on my bed, and Sniff in the cat house.
The crazy upstairs was especially diligent today.
The Food Network and Cablevision still can't synchronize their computers: the display claims that it's Paula Deen's show, when in reality it's someone else. Also, it's interesting to watch Giada doing summery cocktails on a fast day.
Monica Lewinsky is trending at #1 right now: her lingerie, letters from Slick Willie, and other souvenirs of their affair are being auctioned off! "Look, honey, look what I got! It's Monica's black negligee! Do you think it's going to fit you?" And I am sure, being that Clinton was a Rhodes scholar, that his letters were rivaling Shakespeare's sonnets and should really be preserved for posterity and future literary studies.
Heidi Klum is slowly working on removing her ex's name tat on her arm - you have his kids, genius! What does a tattoo matter?
Miley Syrus is sending threatening tweets to her dad - because we did not know enough of their family's secrets.
A video is going viral showing a gorilla who had enough of idiots yelling and making faces at her in the zoo, so she made a face back - good for the primate!
"Khloe Kardashian's Teal Nails - Get the Look" - thanks, but, no thanks.
According to Kris Jenner, Kim's daughter North is happy and healthy - of course she is! She is a baby and does not know yet what wonderful parents she is stuck with.
"Justin Bieber Banned From Indoor Skydiving Facility In Las Vegas" - I don't even want to know what he did to deserve this honor.
No coffee today as it's fast day.


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! The weather is in triple H again, @#%&! Feline companions are once again conserving their energies - George is sleeping on my bed, and Sniff was taking advantage of the cat house till his favorite human showed up - at which point he went into the hall to bath himself in the company of the said human.
The crazy upstairs robbed off on us, because this morning Baby Bro and his guests were vacuuming their shoes.
Anne Burell is making falafel sandwiches - I don't think Israelis will approve of her method of cooking it 
Selma Blair is trending at #2 because Charlie Sheen basically got her fired from his new show Anger Management - which in itself is pretty ironic.
Channing Tatum is trending at #4 for 2 reasons: he "was talking politics" at the premier of White House Down and people got to see his daughter for the first time - well, White House is down since January of 2009, and please spare me the celeb politics and the adoration of their idiot fans.
Nelson Mandela is trending at #10 because of the "critical" condition of his health - no mention of the critical condition of the South Africa after the fall of the "apartheid regime".
"Summer Style Tips from Kendall and Kylie" - thanks, but no - I'll pass.
"Pitt's Ever-Changing Hair" - and people accuse me of folly because I collect Barbies?!!
And, finally, according to the latest rumors, the private suite where Kate is supposed to give birth, offers a "comprehensive wine list" - because that's the first thing a woman in labor or immediately after delivery thinks about - what posh wine to consume.
Coffee this morning in my funky green mug from Yves Rocher.

Sunday, June 23, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Sunday! Shavua Tov! Wishing everyone a fantastic week! The weather is in triple H once again - yeppee, it's summer! 
Feline companions are also not thrilled about the weather and are conserving their movements - sleeping more than usual.
Commercials are annoying to begin with, but being constantly bombarded by either Chris Christie telling that they are "stronger than the storm" or "poor people" whose life was simply in shambles before getting "Obama phones" is more exhausting than the triple H weather.
I recently joked at my roommate telling him that he is leading a decadent lifestyle by listening to the music in the shower; he parried it by informing me that even despite his Caligula-style ablutions, I still spend more time in there than he does.
Speaking of our shower - 2 visiting Bostonians were singing it praises and claiming that it's fantastic and just like a spa! Here is to shower heads that are not new or environmentally efficient!
The crazy upstairs is moving furniture for a change.
There is a whole bunch of sports-related news which I don't understand, so will skip reporting on.
I was reminded that yesterday was the 10th anniversary of the release of The Order of the Phoenix - man, do I feel old! Also, there was a discussion if that book indeed was the worst in the series - hell, yes!
Also, Will, Harry, Beatrice, Eugenie, and Pippa attended some kind of society wedding in the Alnwick Castle (which, apparently, was featured in the HP movies); Kate stayed behind - interesting turn of events.
In honor of North West the public was treated to a whole list of wacky names that celebs gave to their offspring - proving once again that having rich and famous parents does not necessarily make you a lottery winner.
It also looks like Bieber got himself another monkey, because he was searching for it in Miami and making the private jet company fume with his usual extreme lateness.
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

Friday, June 21, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! Happy official first day of summer! The weather rocks - for the last day. Days like this make me resent the fact that I live in Brooklyn - good weather is more enjoyable on the neighbouring island.
The crazy upstairs is busy doing her stuff.
George is snoozing on my bed after making believe that the book on it was a mouse. Sniffles is making himself comfortable in different places looking like he is planning world domination.
Happy Birthday to Prince William - he turns 31 today. Looking at the picture of his proud parents leaving the hospital with him, we can see once again that he won a genetic lottery by not inheriting his looks from his daddy.
Daniel Radcliffe feels he is almost ready to tackle Shakespeare - ah, the poor Elizabethan women hater!
Guess who is trending at #1? If you said "Kardashian baby", you got it right. The real ( not contrived) name was finally revealed - North West. Poor kid! It's not enough to have these two morons for parents, but, to compound it, to be stuck with a name like this!
Jim Carrey is trending at #4 because he is officially signed up for the sequel of Dumb and Dumber - a very fitting role for this distinguished artist.
"Tips any woman can use to fend off an attack" - the first tip that comes to mind is a loaded gun, but, of course, it's not on the list.
Maddie, a 5-year old daughter of Jamie Lynn Spears, got a taste for designer shoes - as long as her mommy is paying for them, I don't care.
Bryan Cranston admitted to playing a villain on Power Rangers - which, in my opinion, was better role than the one he is currently playing.
"Justin Bieber goes shirtless for first instagram video" - be still, my guts!
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather rocks! Yesterday Sniff was guarding the defrosting chicken without an attempt to eat it, and then both he and George ignored the schnitzels - spoiled American cats! :) This morning George came in to snuggle (without the feline grooming), and Sniff was meowed at by a passing girl while he was peacefully sitting on the window sill, enjoying the sun, and guarding iced tea.
Ina was doing Greek stuff, which did not sound promising as I don't like either feta or lamb; Melissa was doing pickled veggies and pizza on the grill - which did sound promising (although my grill is for meat).
The national preoccupation with spying produced some interesting results - yesterday I got a detailed letter from the bank explaining to me with whom do they share my information and why. Also, according to FB, I have 8 people "following" me, but when I click on the info, I only get 6 people. Who are the other 2?
Arnold Schwarzenegger is signed up for Terminator 5 - can Terminators get old?
Candy Crash Saga is currently trending at #1 - why?!
Dunkin Donuts are trending at #4 because they don't want to be "just a donut company" - how about just teaching your employees to brew a decent coffee for a change, never mind understanding and speaking English?
Maria Menounos is trending at #5 because she was "sporting" a black bikini on the beach in Greece; and Mariah Carey was also "flaunts trendy, barely there beachwear" - who is with me to sport and flaunt bathing suits on the local beach?
Gisele Bundchen is trending at #7 because she was doing yoga with her daughter - aw, how sweet! I hope the whole exercise was conducted with minimum carbon footprints.
PACE and Polytech are on the list of the most underrated colleges in America - interesting.
Among the 20 things that are supposed to make women happy I barely found 4 that make me happy - which, once again, proves my point - I am not that feminine. Also, one of the things was "being asked for a date" - spare me!
List of celebrities who "made fortunes off their baby photos" - and here I thought they could not sink lower.
Miley Cyrus had an "icky" job when she was a kid - she and her brother used to collect panties and bras off the stage after their father's concerts. Aw, how nice! No wonder she turned out so well-adjusted.
Brad Pitt has an "unusual" talent - he can yodel. I guess it's much more usual than common decency.
Coffee this morning in my San Fran latte mug.

Thursday, June 20, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! The weather rocks - and, like all New Yorkers, I wish it would stay for the whole summer!
Feline companions are enjoying the absence of heat as well. Georgie spent the night in my room and came in to snuggle in the morning; Sniff was once again objecting to the locked door of the bathroom and greeted me after the shower.
Ina was making a whole bunch of delicious meat stuffs - her pasta bolognese is my pasta with meat sauce, and she also likes to use other than spaghetti pasta - I guess I should apply for my own food show. Sandra, on the other hand, was baking! her falafel balls, and she added shredded carrots to the mixture! White demon she is. Anne Burrell is making a Jewish dinner of brisket and potato pancakes!
Daniel Radcliffe has a new artistic ambition: he wants to play a Bond villain - really?!!
Trending at #5: watermelon Oreos - I don't know about the taste, but it's definitely another ammunition against the black racists. I mean, we have all white (vanilla) Oreos now, plus yellowish (lemon), and now watermelon - so, they got to come up with a new taunt for black conservatives. Good luck, oh proud products of our public school systems!
Dolce and Gabbana were sentenced for tax evasion - I guess paying taxes into the socialist system that feeds the lazy and the invading barbarians is not popular in Europe as well, not just in the US.
"How Kardashian could profit from baby" - because what she has now makes her eligible for food stamps?
Red Robin was forced to issue an apology because one of their commercials was "disrespectful" towards vegetarians - the apologies from vegetarians and PETA towards meat-eaters and leather wearers are forthcoming as well, I am sure.
"The Right Way To Boil Potatoes" - are you joking?!
Brad Pitt was recently mobbed in Times Square at the premier of his new movie - which proved once again that there a lot of moronic women out there who simply adore jerks. On the side note - who ever proclaimed Pitt handsome (especially in his present hirsute state) needs a refresher course in a good art museum.
"Rihanna Eclipses Justin Bieber as Top Youtube Artist" - which fact does not disprove the moronism of the general population or their appalling taste in music.
And, finally, Will is planning to take 2 week paternity leave after the baby comes, after which he will be back on his military duty - aw!
Coffee this morning in my striped galls from Target.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! The weather is iffy again, but still tolerable - although feline companions are not happy. They don't like heat, rain, or a/c, for that matter - they like everything to be just perfect, spoiled brats. 
Paula was making some delicious southern stuff using 3 different kinds of flavored butter, Ina assembled home made granola that I would love to try (and I hate granola), and Melissa used 2 different flavored butters - go butter!
Godiva just sent me a email: they are trying to encourage people to spruce up their communities over this coming weekend - aw, how sweet (no pun intended). Well, the only way to improve my community is to deport all the illegals - for starters; and, somehow, I don't think Godiva wants to get behind this one.
Kim and Kanye's baby is trending at #1, and, according to the people in the know, her name is Kaidence Donda West - could you imagine poor kid on her first day of school?!
Trending at #2: Sofia Vergara (who, apparently, is 40 years old) donned s string bikini, got photographed in it, and posted it online - I wonder if I should have done the same around my 40th birthday; then, maybe, I would be a bit richer now?
An enterprising 4th grader right here, in our fair city of New York, secretly filmed his school lunches and basically called them "yuck" - where are you, nanny Bloomy and parteigenosse Michelle?
"Best Toilet Paper Brands" - only in America! In dear step-mama country ANY toilet paper was almost as precious as vodka!
"Young Celebs Bring Back Body Chains Look" - their claim to fame that's not even an original idea? Truly an achievement!
Justin Bieber hit a paparazzi with his Ferrari - who the heck issued him a driver's licence and why does he still have it?
And, finally, a union boss in England was making a "fiery speech" against welfare cuts and accused Kate of being a "young woman having babies to get state handouts" - and here I thought union bosses could not get any slimier or moronic.
Coffee this morning in my huge Disney Pooh and Friends mug.

Monday, June 17, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! The weather is once again in triple H, darn it - well, summer is here.
George came in to snuggle this morning, and this time he decided not to groom me in the manner of all felines; instead, he wanted to play my secretary and answer the phone that was blaring from the night stand. Sniffles was taking the air on the window sill in the kitchen and giving us his usual glance of utter disdain. One look at him and I postulated that that was probably the precise pose and look that made the ancient Egyptians start worshiping cats; Baby Bro was in complete agreement.
Ina was making some kind of mouth-watering porterhouse with another chef in California. After grilling it they "bathed" it in clarified butter with garlic and herbs!
ION is showing Mercury Rising once again - I wonder if they are doing it just because, or in the spirit of current events (not that that was a profound movie or anything).
Second of five things you did not know about Emma Watson: she was the youngest person (at 15) to ever appear on the cover of Teen Vogue - another magnificent piece of historical trivia without which your life simply won't be complete.
Kim Kardashian is trending at #3 for the obvious reasons, but no additional news on the baby - millions of fans biting their nails in anticipation!
Channing Tatum, on the other hand, just shared the pictures of his baby daughter - oodles of satisfied fans on this front.
In the news of fashion: "Bjork outdoes Swan Dress" - with a head dress that completely blows, in my estimation! Plus, I kind of dug the swan dress too.
Justin Bieber won big in some kind of awards - more girlfriends for him?
Kate attended Queen's birthday parade in pink, which to people in the know meant that she was saying her baby is a girl - ah, the profound things in life people are concerned with!
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Sunday! Shavua Tov! Happy Father's Day to all the wonderful dads out there! The weather is a bit iffy, but not bad. Sniff keeps trying to escape the apartment and explore the hallway; George was trying to hunt some birds earlier today.
The Singing Slavs disappointed us last night and did not perform as scheduled.
The news of monumental proportions - Kim K. gave birth to her daughter yesterday! No details available yet, aside from the fact that the baby supposedly looks like her mommy and her name will begin with K; the hard-core fans usually come equipped with a lot of patience, so, they will wait for the rest of the information as it comes along.
Second important piece of news: Jennifer Connelly's hair are now shoulder length - well, she does look a bit younger with the new style. In the same vein - blonde is not Olivia Wilde's best look.
Pope blessed hundreds of Harleys this morning - interesting. So now we should stop calling the bikers "organ donors"?
Among the things "you don't know about Emma Watson" is the fact that she was born on April 15 in Paris and lived in France till the age of 5 - congratulations! You just learned a very important bit of historical trivia.
Paris Jackson hates Justin Bieber - aw, poor Justin!
And, finally, Kate does seem to be enjoying some quite time.
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

Friday, June 14, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! Happy Flag Day and Happy Birthday to US Armed Forces!
People complain about the weather, but to me - no triple H, no torrential rain, no need for a/c - me very happy! The crazy upstairs is doing her usual deeds. My roommate decided to enjoy a decadent lifestyle and is now blasting music in the shower.
Sniff was not happy about the closed bathroom door - or the music, for that matter; but then Sniff rarely looks happy. Baby Bro had an idea to create inspirational posters with that animal with a caption "Mr. Sniffles does not approve!" George, on the other hand, came in to snuggle last night and decided to groom me again in the cat style - the fact that I am not a cat did not penetrate his feline brain.
Alton Browne was talking about soft pretzels - and I immediately pictured him with a nice home-made pretzel and a big shot gun. Ina is making French onion soup and chocolate mousse with whipped cream - yum!
Sandra Bullock is trending at #2 right now because she showed up at the premier of her new movie in a backless dress that showed off her bra - as if she is the only one who flashes her unmentionables!
More from the news of fashion: "J Lo rocks curve-hugging dress" - no danger of her ever rocking her brains.
And yet more from the news of fashion: Miley Cyrus stepped out in "hybrid" denim and sweatpants - at least this is not permanent, like a tat.
"Who Is Kate Upton Kissing?" - as long as it's not me, I really don't care.
Mariah Carey is a huge fan of "The Game of Thrones" - my friends who are the fans (you know who you are) - welcome a new member to your club!
Jennifer Aniston recently remodeled her house and the back yard, but kept the chicken coop that was there when she purchased the house - I wonder if she feeds those chickens herself. Now that would be a photo op!
"Selena Gomez Is Done with Justin Bieber After Miley Cyrus Flirt Fest" - well, duh! I guess Jelena is well and truly dead.
Coffee this morning in my Coffee Bean/Tea Leaf mug.


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! It's raining and pouring once more, and Baby Bro surmised that it must be the fault of the Jews, as we pray for rain - and we got it.
Feline companions are extra sleepy again, and right now George is sleeping on my bed, so Sniffles is taking advantage of it and sleeping in the cat house. Both of them were also deemed by our resident cat expert fit enough to be served full fat food together with their usual weight loss chow.
Melissa is cooking meal full of pork products - so, I guess that when she was living in Paris, Muslims did not attack non-Muslims for eating pork - or maybe she feels safe cooking it here.
Jennie Garth is trending at #2 because she finalized her divorce. She also took the "unusual approach to it" - the divorce was quite and civilized; that is unusual!
Trending at #9 are the skyrocketing sales of "1984" - huge surprise! The only unusual factor is that the book did not become extra popular about 5 years ago.
"Honey Boo Boo's Mom Sports 'Baywatch' look" - spare me, please!
"Betty White's Unusual Lunch" - hot dogs and fries! Oh, come on, people! She is 91, for goodness sake! Let her enjoy it!
Happy 27th Birthday to Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen! How to tell them apart? Ask for their autograph - Ashley is right-handed, and Mary-Kate uses her left one.
"Jessica Alba rocks retro swimsuit" - in order to really "rock" a 60's swimsuit you got to have the glamour and femininity of the 60's stars, which is totally absent from modern Hollywood, so, stop swooning, guys.
Halle Berry's fiance accidentally blabbed their baby's gender (they are having a boy) - I wonder how many nights did he spend on the couch because of it?
Kris Jenner is getting her own show - and here I thought the collective IQ of their audience could not go any lower.
Speaking of which - another scandal is rocking the nation! It looks like Kanye cheated on Kim! Of course, he is denying the accusations - but who would believe him, anyway?
"What's The Deal With Justin Bieber's Crazy Car Collection?" - um, allow me to go on a limb here and postulate - crazy owner?
And, finally, Kate attended the naming of the Princess Cruise's new ship, after which she is supposed to go on maternity leave - rest well, Kate, and good luck!
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.

Thursday, June 13, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! The weather rocks! 
Happy 25th Anniversary to my family! Gd bless USA and the memory of Ronald Reagan!
And, now, to weightier matters.
Feline companions are enjoying the good weather - they are less sleepy and more aggressive. George also became more vocal (it that is possible) since he re-acquainted himself with wet food - the requests are frequent and very loud. Sniffles is much less demanding - at least in this area. For now they have divided the spheres of influence in Baby Bro's room: Sniff is on his bed, and George is in the huge Amazon box.
Godiva send me a reminder about upcoming Father's Day - they are obviously not that familiar with my dad and his personal taste in chocolate if they are seriously suggesting I buy some of their stuff for him.
Emma Watson "stole the show" in a low cut dress - spare me. If any female celebrity "steals the show" dressed like a Mormon or a lady from PB, that would be news; this is not.
Heidi Klum is currently trending at #3 because of her drunken argument with a boyfriend - already? I guess the bliss did not last that long.
Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer finally revealed the names of their twins after 10 months! Their poor fans! And here I thought that the few days it took for the Tatum's fans to find out about his baby were hard!
"Snooki's Most Elegant Look" - here is an oxymoron for you.
"Surprisingly useful things to do with vodka" - don't embarrass yourselves, people! You just figured those out?!! Russians have known it for centuries!
Justin Bieber was caught flirting with Miley Cyrus - I guess the Jelena is over once again. What would it be now? Melena? Cyber? Jumi? The possibilities are endless.
"Even the hermit who spent 27 years alone can't escape the Kardashians" - ouch!
Coffee this morning in my Aruba mug - in honor of the magnificent weather 


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! The weather seems to be improving, but still threatening with rains. Yesterday Baby Bro casually asked if it actually rained for about 40 days now and maybe he should start building something or other.
The owner of the fangs that left impressions in my arm Saturday night still did not come forward. Yesterday, as I was about to go to bed, Sniff, unlike George, did not come in to snuggle; instead he decided to run around like a horse and yowl loudly. He also got cat's tuna today - thankfully, without the adverse effects of human tuna.
Crazy upstairs is not only up to her usual tricks, but it sounds like they are moving furniture - in the morning as well as around 1:30 am; well, strictly speaking, that's also morning.
Melissa is making tabbouleh with Israeli couscous - her husband is from France; doesn't she know that it's dangerous to irritate our dear first cousins?
Godiva sent me a reminder about this month's as of yet unclaimed freebies - ah, how sweet! (pun not intended)
Emma Watson is "gracing" the cover of the latest issue of W in "old glamour" shot - funny, I don't remember old glamour shots with just a jacket.
Amy Adams departed from her "conservative" style at the premiere of "Man of Steel" - translation: she put on black dress with lace and "peekaboo details" in the back.
Katy Perry also made into the news of fashion and also with black: she showed up in goth-channeling ensemble.
"14 "Game of Thrones' insults" - I really prefer Shakespeare, but hey, that's what you get with proud products of our educational system.
In suburban Atlanta a monument erected there about a year ago and dedicated to parteigenosse Michelle's ancestor was toppled - I guess average rednecks got tired of the cult of personality.
7 odd things that thieves love to steal: Bibles, pregnancy tests, Nutella, hair extensions, high end vacuum cleaners, energy drinks and Tide! Feel free to compose a limerick in order to make sense of this. The whole list makes me laugh, especially Bibles. Come to think of it, Nutella, Tide, and preggo tests also take the cake.
And, finally, gamblers are betting big bucks on Kate's baby - sex, hair color, names; but, most importantly, will it come before or after Kim K.'s baby. And people tell me I that I have no life!
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.

Monday, June 10, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! It's raining pretty hard today - the second thing I hate about NY weather, after triple H, is torrential rain. Ah, well, at least I don't have to go out - thank you, Stop & Shop!
Ladies, I hope your Rosh Chodesh was nice and enjoyable yesterday, and you did not overdo it on the domestic front, and, of course, your husbands gave you presents like they are supposed to - I know, I can always dream.
George hears when I get into bed - because he immediately appears in my room from wherever he was before, jumps on my bed as well, and begins meowing piteously, asking to be petted. On the same topic - I would dearly like to know why I have a faint impression of 4 feline fangs on my arm. Sniff likes to sleep with Baby Bro - more specifically, on his head. And, as it's raining, both cats are in their beds of choice.
Breaking headline from the end of last week: Chewbacca was stopped by TSA over his light saber - even iconic figures and weapons are not save from TSA.
Speaking of which:Star Wars Episode VII will begin filming in January - I wonder what kind of geeks this one will attract.
Beyonce attended Kanye's birthday party in a "midriff baring outfit" that squashed pregnancy rumors - staff and patients at Lenox Hill can breathe easy. And speaking of preggos - Kanye's shindig did not include a future mother of his child, Kim K. - go figure.
Currently trending at #2: "Patrick Schwarzenegger flexes muscle" - I guess being exited about flexing brain is too much to ask.
Trending at # 1: Kylie Jenner takes her Mercedes SUV for a spa day - please see above.
Simon Cowell was pelted with eggs on live TV - what too so long?
List of bizarre allergies: money (nickel), shoes (leather), and water (additives in it) - wow! I guess if I am only allergic to human stupidity, I should count myself very lucky.
"Justin Bieber Snaps Photo of Fan's Bra, Tweets "I Guess Everyone Grows Up" - yuk!
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

Friday, June 07, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! It's pouring outside - but, thank Gd, no triple H! Feline companions are not very happy about the weather, though, and sleep more than usual. George dragged the confiscated from Claudio and recently re-discovered mouse to my room. Sniff got into the pantry again and re-sniffed all the cans there. The crazy upstairs is back with a vengeance.
Happy 6th Birthday to my sweet nephew! I love you tons, my big boy!
Happy National Donut Day! Of course, my faves are not available in this here neighbourhood. But, for those concerned with the issue - I finally finished all my Godiva freebies this morning.
Emma Watson is planning to go back to Brown - everyone is waiting with baited breath and wondering if the second time would be the charm for her.
Khloe Kardashian is currently trending at #4, but I can't figure out why - ah, who cares.
"Recipe for a perfect yellow cake" - if I am not mistaken, isle 12 in Stop and Shop has Duncan Hines, and yellow cake mix is usually on sale.
The valedictorian who ripped up his approved graduation speech and said a prayer instead made the national news! They also did not forget to mention that the audience applauded, but the teachers did not look pleased - eat it, liberal hacks!
On the lighter side, another high school published a year book with a picture of a dog in it - his picture was the cutest from all the others shown.
"Putin announced split from his wife on state TV" - I know people speculate a lot on what happened, but I, frankly, don't give a flying banana.
"Hottest shoes for the summer" - if they are not comfy, I don't care how hot they are.
"Celeb Vacation Spots for Less" - I don't want to see them on ordinary days, why would I want to vacation in the same area?
"Justin Bieber Announces Latin America Tour Dates" - what would it be? Another monkey? Or maybe a rare parrot? Another swooning fit? The fans are on tenterhooks of anticipation!
Another designer, this time Roberto Cavalli, offered his two cents worth of opinion on how Kate could be dressing - he thinks she could be "bolder" in her choices.
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.

Thursday, June 06, 2013


So, another Memorial Day came and went. Almost everyone got their day off – and my local library got three days in a row. Our Usurper-in Chief got to bloviate once more. There were, of course, sales galore, barbecues, and throngs of people just having good time. Our dear city, where Memorial Day is usually the official start of the air conditioning season, was blessed with a magnificent day – warm, sunny, breezy, low humidity; just perfect.

I made a mistake of actually leaving my stinking borough, which was long ago overrun by barbarian hordes, where English is pretty rare, and American flags are rarer still (even on Memorial Day), and traveled to Manhattan – because I simply had to enjoy the sunshine somewhere. And I never felt more like looking for the wanted ads in Houston like I did on that gorgeous New York Monday.

There were, as usual, big crowds taking advantage of the rare spring weather. Thanks again to He Who Must Not Be Named and who canceled Fleet Week, there were no sailors in those crowds (bummer for me, as I enjoy seeing real men on the streets of our city for a change). All those people – and I could count on the fingers of one hand the number of the ones who somehow acknowledged what the day was. Moreover, it was another variation on “multicultural” garbage that I was trying to escape – apparently in vain. Throngs and throngs of people (some of them literally stinking),speaking in barbarian tongues; most notably, “Hispanics” and, even more soul-pleasing, a whole rainbow of the practitioners of the religion of peace. It was such a perfect, totally Memorial Day-themed scene!

But eventually the sun, that natural healer from the Almighty, calmed me down a bit, and my brain started thinking about different things. Enemies that our warriors died fighting – Nazis, Communists, Muslims. All the malevolent forces who tried and are still trying to destroy America – and the Jews; everyone hates Big Satan and little Satan. And yet here I am – a free American. And, as dorky as it sounds, I was reminded once again that I owe it to their memory as well as to my conscience to never surrender and to never give up. I always joked that one of the reasons I do not want to move out of New York is in order not to give up my position to invading liberals and other America-haters. Well, jokes aside, I really feel like this.

So, Houston, I love you, and you do have many more real men roaming you streets, but I am staying put – because falling back and surrendering is not an option, as we, American patriots, are reminded every Memorial Day.


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather is still rocking! George is back in his Amazon box; Sniff came in to snuggle this morning. People usually stare at my feet because I am wearing flippies in 40 degree weather, but now they are staring at the weird design, which is the result of Sniff's nibbling - thanks, kitty! Also, Baby Bro and I had a slight disagreement regarding George's full name: according to me, he is George Hamilton Borukhov; according to Baby Bro, he is either George Borukhov (as per vet's records), or he is George Ffuffikin Hamilton - I guess the decision of the judges is final, as he (George) is officially my roommate's kitty.
Emma Watson "debuts a new hair style at the movie premier" - translation: her hair is now shoulder-length.
Trending at #3: Drunk governor - Massachusetts governor admits to getting drunk after the marathon bombings. Brilliant signs of a true leader - not only being a wuss, but proudly admitting it!
Jennifer Aniston "recycled" a dress - number one - isn't recycling good? Number two - give her a break; whatever she is guilty of, I am sure that being married to Brad Pitt goes a long way towards redemption.
A woman in Duluth got horrible back pain, which resulted in a baby on the next day - she claims she had no idea she was pregnant whatsoever; plus, her hubby had a vasectomy - I guess somebody somewhere has some splainin to do, beginning with the doctor who performed that said vasectomy.
"Steal Style Ideas from Celebrities Kitchens" - thanks, but no thanks.
Daniel Radcliffe would like to have children - good luck, dude!
Justin Bieber is planing a trip to space - I thought he already came from there.
Coffee this morning in my San Fran latte mug - which reminds me: Central Park is beginning to look like The City By The Bay - too many men holding hands (yuk and barf).


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! Weather rocks once again! Last night Sniff decided that maybe it might be my week as well and came to snuggle, lick, and head butt - all, of course, while I was sleeping.
Marc Summers was talking about midnight snacks and munchies - in honor of college graduations?
Yesterday I observed a following tableau: a little boy of about 4 or 5 was walking in Central Park together with his liberal UWS daddy. He (the boy) had a piece of soft pretzel in his hand - but that was too boring. So, he started waving it in the air and yelling: "Look, daddy, this is my gun!" - take that, libtards and Bloomberg! Boys will be boys, and they love to play with guns!
Daniel Radcliffe would like to star in Star Wars - that would be an interesting battle of different nerds and crazies.
Adele is trending at #3 because Rolling Stones would like to perform together with her - again, that would be an interesting mix of differently disturbed people.
Jennifer Love Hewitt is pregnant and engaged (to the father of her future child) - mazal tov!
A dude claims to have lost 250 lb on the 99c store diet - I believe it's called semi-starvation.
Emma Watson almost had a wardrobe malfunction at the premiere of her latest movie - here is my thought: with some many clothes "malfunctions" of the stars lately, maybe it's time to rethink the clothing choices?
Among the 10 best foods for you salmon is mentioned once again - is it why it's so effin expensive?
"Katie Couric isn't as nice as you think" - yea, no joke, Sherlock! Right wingers have known this little tidbit for a while.
Amazon is expanding into online grocery business - so now we would be able to do a one stop shopping for both mind and body.
And, finally, Kate "recycled" her outfit from the Diamond Jubilee to the 60th Anniversary of coronation with a minor difference: her baby bump - oh, what a profound observation!
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

Wednesday, June 05, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! The weather rocks!!! It's definitely not my week in Sniff's estimation - he hardly looks at me. George, on the other hand, alternated between my bed and the cat house last night.
Ina is baking cookies and making sandwiches with herb butter - yum!
Baby Bro and I were discussing the constant overabundance of emergency vehicles outside. He postulated that it was either a)proximity to the hospital, b) the amount of elderly neighbors, c) the amount of degenerates in the area - we both settled on c.
Daniel Radcliffe admitted to being a "fussy eater" and barely eating any fruit or vegetables - in light of these horrible truths coming out I don't see any way for parteigenosse Michelle to allow him to hang out with her daughters.
Katie Holmes is trending at #4 because it looks like her ex is missing her - well, dude, maybe if you kept up with your anti-psychotic meds, you wouldn't be single now.
Bradley Cooper is trending at #6 because he traveled to DC to listen to Barry Hussein's opening comments at the National Conference on Mental Health - another one in need of meds (Cooper, not Hussein).
Channing Tatum's fans finally found out that his wife had a girl and that her name is Everly - congratulations! I hope it was worth the wait!
Advise for a wedding gift: don't give baby clothes! Who the heck does that?!! Oh, yes, of course, it was in My Big Fat Greek Wedding! Probably also popular in some of our circles.
Maria Carey was spotted in "belly baring ensemble" again - why is this news again?
Bieber was spotted with a "mystery brunette" who is not Selena Gomez - I guess his bout of crying over his breakup with Selena is over. Incidentally, Tatum's "paternal instincts are kicking in" as he claims that he is worried over Bieber - dude, stick to your own progeny.
Coffee this morning in my Boston mug.

Monday, June 03, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! It's raining outside, but there is no triple H - thank Gd! Feline companions do not appreciate the rain and are now sleeping - George on my bed, and Sniff by Baby Bro. By the way, I think this is the week when Sniff is being nice to my roommate, as all he did at night was to sleep in the cat house - there was no snuggling on my bed.
Recent discovery - donating blood to NY Blood Bank is a better experience than donating to Maimonides hospital - the phlebotomists know what they are doing, and afterwards you actually find out what blood type you are.
Daniel Radcliffe doesn't just want one tat - he wants to get lots of them, once he is finished filming all his "naked scenes". Oh, come on - there is such thing as makeup, Daniel! Go ahead and ink up!
Courtney Love Cobain recently twitted to Amanda Bynes, urging her to "pull it together" - which advice, coming from Love, looks like a height of delusional mania grandiosity.
Portia de Rossi is trending at #2 now because of fans "wild speculations" about whenever or not she had plastic surgery - considering how plasticy she looks to begin with, I think the discussion is moot.
Tatum baby is trending at #3 - even though we still don't know either the sex or the name of the said baby.
Trending at #6 is Kardashian baby: the public finally found out that Kim and Kanye are having a girl - yippee!
Speaking of which - Bruce Jenner is trending at #2 for "slamming" Kanye about "never being around" - trouble in paradise?
An apple a day is apparently beneficial for your memory; the other beneficial product - red whine! Interesting - so, if we drink white wine, we forget all the garbage men visit on us, but if we drink red whine, we remember it? Points to ponder.
Justin Bieber was "driving around" with a "mystery blond" - oh, heck, Jelena over again?! Also, he claimed that he is enjoying "much needed time off" - ditto, Justin. We would really appreciate time off from you.
And, finally, Kate Middleton was "slammed for 'glamorous pregnancy'", making it hard for "real pregnant women" - yea, because being pregnant and having no privacy is fun; it is also very hard to figure out that if you have gobs of money and personal attendants, your pregnancy is "more glamorous".
Coffee this morning in my huge Disney Pooh and Friends mug.

Sunday, June 02, 2013


Good Morning, peeps! Happy Sunday! Shavua Tov! Happy June! The weather is in triple H again - me, Georgie, and Sniff not happy about it. George was extra demanding yesterday, and kept biting me after being petted - although according to Baby Bro that's their way of showing love and attention as well (they attempt to groom you). And speaking of feline love - Sniff was extra attentive and snuggly as well - which Baby Bro suspects is his PR campaign of proving to us that he really is a fantastic pet, and he takes me on even weeks, and him on alternate ones.
The Best Thing I Ever Made had a meat-lovers segment on - yum! Also, Channel 9 is showing the Salute to Israel Parade, which reminds me of not one, but two instances of not so youthful folly when I volunteered to this event.
Dr. Ruth was a sniper and fought in Israeli War of Independence - I would never look at her in the same way!
Saturday was the "worst day" of Tiger's career - and here I thought it was the day he was playing with comrade Barry Hussein; go figure.
Channing Tatum's first baby was born on Thursday - fans sit in anticipation of sex and name announcements.
Trending at #6: Kanye baby shower - both Kanye's and Kardashian families are expected to attend this blessed event, and my head does not even want to imagine it.
Selena Gomez had a nice day of shopping yesterday minus Justin Bieber - aw, the fans of Jelena suffered another setback!
Speaking of Bieber: his former pet monkey got a new home at a wildlife park in Germany - I guess the attendance there would be high for at least a little while.
And, finally, Kate is scheduled to participate in a ship naming a month before her baby is due - and people in the know are waiting with baited breath to see what she is going to wear.
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.