MORNING UPDATE - June 18, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! The temperatures are still climbing. Snow is sunning herself and ignoring the birds that are singing around her.
Currently trending at # 1 is Jenny McCarthy - because she and Donnie Wahlberg "Talk Wedding Plans". Does that translate into another book?
Catherine Zeta-Jones is trending at # 2 - because Michael Douglas admitted that "he took her for granted". Admit it to her, you moron, not to the reporters.
"What spoiled Kim Kardashian's honeymoon" - who gives a flying banana?
"Halle Berry sparkles in curve-hugging dress" - mighty empowering.
"For peace of mind consumers should look for the "USDA Organic" seal (on body care products), a specialist says" - the said specialist can take any and all "USDA Organic" seals from food and body care products and stick it where the sun does not shine.
Mike Sorrentino, aka The Situation of the Jersey Shore fame, got arrested for fighting with his brother at the family tanning salon - interesting family squabbles.
"One man's quest for fast-food perfection" - entertaining date he would make.
Chanel No. 5 has 80 ingredients, "including one that blossoms in France only three weeks a year" - is that the one that gives it a distinct stink that produces headaches?
"Prices for US consumers rise significantly" - ya think?!!! Where were you for the past 5 years?!
"Uruguay national team's dulce de leche shipment confiscated by Brazilian authorities" - this takes the term "bureaucratic stupidity" to a whole new level.
And, finally, Kate is scheduled to meet a woman who worked as a decoder with her paternal grandmother during the WWII - I really envy the Brits sometimes! The granny of their princess was actively involved in the defeat of the Nazis; the grandmother of our prez was a commie! Plus, to add insult to injury, the mother of our so-called first lady supposedly never served cake to her kids!
Coffee this morning in the other flowery mug.

MORNING UPDATE - May 9, 2014

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! I know that for most of you it's TGIF, but for me it's just a day off smile emoticon
The weather is still rainy, but not too bad.
Sniff found himself a new perch, of which is he very possessive - of course, George did not discover it yet; I see many a battle ahead. 
Crazy upstairs woke up pretty late today, but still performed her usual routine.
Last week saw a nice guy perusing romance section in the library - I wonderwhy.
Shailene Woodley is drawing feminists' ire because she recently claimed that she is not one, because she likes men - good for you, Shailene. I don't like men, and I am still not a feminist.
Currently trending at #1 is Mark Wahlberg - because he is "set to produce reality pilot about MIT grads". I assume their job prospects and the reason for it would not be discussed.
Trending at # 8 is Jenny McCarthy - because she "clarifies her stance on vaccination". Why this woman is not arrested on the charged of public endangerment is beyond me - as well as trying to figure out how any parent could have listened to her sage advice.
Among the top bestselling products are Star Wars, Lipitor, Rubic's Cube, Harry Potter, I Phones, I Pads, Corolla, Michael Jackson, Play Stations, and Mario Bros. - interesting mix; quiet fascinating.
"Gisele wows in hemp gown" - because she has to prove to us, again and again, how important it is to be "environmentally friendly". The only information omitted was how much electricity is burned in order to photograph her in her always environmentally friendly threads.
Morissey was "mobbed by fans in concert" - I sincere hope none of them ate meat products prior to hugging their idol.
Mel Brooks admitted that he would not have been able to shoot Blazing Saddles today because of political correctness - which is beyond amusing as the whole idea of the movie was to make fun of racists.
"A new study links a wife's happiness to how her husband helps out around the house" - WOW! You needed a whole study for this?!!
Coffee this morning in my huge Pooh mug.

MORNING UPDATE - DECEMBER 12

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather remains cold - still no flippies. Felines, however, adjusted a bit to the cold and are much more active. Sniff did his tail-puffing routine, and George did his treat-demanding routine.
The crazy upstairs is strangely quite; however, the new crazy did her screaming and cursing outside.
Both FB and Linkedin keep offering me to get connected to a bunch of people that I am desperately trying to avoid in real life; why would I want to connect with them in cyberspace?
Currently trending at #1 is Jenny McCarthy - because, according to someone named Julie Chen, Jenny "is not good for the View". Really?! I think she fits perfectly there, together with all the other uneducated and uninformed harpies. What really gets me going is seeing her books in Family and Childcare section - because I am old enough to remember her other book, with completely different cover, which would not be appropriate anywhere near children.
Trending at #10 are cashmere sweaters - very, very important subject, boys and girls, what can I say.
Kim Kardashian claims that she has "mixed feelings" about her latest bikini cover shot because she is so "critical" of herself - lady, please. You look even less smart once your mouth opens.
"Oprah and 'The Butler' got snubbed by the Globes" - by heart bleeds borsch.
Sriracha shortage continues - this is beginning to remind me of my childhood.
"Seattle police uncover stolen wine stash" - 2,500 bottles worth more than $650,000 were recovered. Who was robbed to begin with - Frasier Crane?
Kevin Federline is expecting his 6th child - where are social services when you need them?
"Justin Bieber May Face Interpol Arrest" - OK, let's not get overly dramatic here.
And, finally, Kate "recycled" yet another dress - listen, even Princesses have to stick to some kind of a budget (unlike, of course, our embarrassment of the First Lady).
Coffee this morning in my Disney Mini Bean Bag Plush mug with Mickey and Friends.

MORNING UPDATE - JULY 17

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! It's officially heat wave # 10 or so in our fair city, @#%&!
Feline companions got new, fancier litter box; right now they are battling heat by sleeping in my room in their usual places - ergo my bed and the cat house.
Ina claims that adding mushrooms to mac and cheese makes it elegant - I just think adding mushrooms to almost anything makes it tastier; plus, you get a shot of Vitamin D 
Whoever repaired TVs in the local laundromat and switched them from Channel 7 to Channel 4 so I am not tortured with The View anymore - thank you, oh dear fellow human!
Speaking of The View - Jenny McCarthy is slated to join that gaggle of clucking hens, and it seems like a lot of people complained. Why? She is pure perfection there!
And speaking of laundromat: a nice, very civic minded young lady there confessed to all and sundry that she never knows if Amber Alert is usually for a car or a child - oh, Gd help us!
Jennifer Hudson is the latest celebrity who wants to melt all the swords into the plow shears: she instagramed a picture of herself wearing a t-shirt that spells "love" out of different weapons. Lady, I can almost forgive you the Weight Watchers, but this really is beyond the pale.
"Rihanna flashes diamond-encrusted teeth" - how ghetto of her.
Goth Barbie is currently trending at #1 because she is now the second bestselling doll - second only to Barbie doll (whatever that means) - well, I looked at the pictures and I can assure you that Goth Barbie would not be a part of my collection.
Trending at #9 - Olympic boycott. Apparently, Senator Lindsay Graham, he of Gang of 8 Amnesty and muslim butt kissing, proposed to boycott Olympics in Sochi if Russia grants asylum to Snowden. Uh, Lindsay, the time to act was before Snowden flew the coop and blabbed our secrets to Chinese and Russians! Now try to do your primary job by at least making believe you want to protect US citizens against the barbarians!
CNN will air "Will and Kate plus One" this Thursday night, regardless of whatever the baby will actually appear or not by that point - at least that will give them an hour off kissing Hussein's behind and attacking America and its patriots.
Meanwhile, the Queen admitted that she is anxious for the baby to arrive as she is going on holiday - grandma, go and enjoy! Will will call you with the news as soon he or she will arrive!
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - JULY 14

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Sunday! Shavua Tov! Hope this will be a great week for all of you! The weather is, once again, triple H - eff it!
George spent most of the night on my bed and kept trying to groom me - my repeated assurances that I am not a cat did not work. Also, I think that he is a glutton for punishment, because he mainly sleeps by my feet and, I am sure, gets kicked plenty while I am sleeping. Sniff finally proved to be a decent hunter last night. Right now both of them are sleeping in their designated spots in my room.
The morning on TV started with about 3 infomercials from Guthy Renker, and then moved on to about 5 or 6 infomercials for different juicers - which was still more interesting than Meet The Nation with Reid vs. McConnell.
Yesterday Dad was burning to write a letter to NYPD informing them that their traffic division is comprised of people who are either dumb or blind or both (as he got ticketed for not having his registration displayed on his car, when, in fact, the registration was displayed in almost comically huge size right on his windshield) - we wisely disabused him of this notion.
Guess what's trending at #1 right now? Donnie Wahlberg - because he is dating Jenny McCarthy! Nice to know that so many people have their priorities straight!
Trending at #2 - Tara Reid; right after a bunch of her images (all of them half-naked), there is a great piece of news confirming that "she is up for a 'Sharknado' sequel" - again, great to know!
Miley Cyrus made fashion news - she went to Trader Joe's wearing what I can only describe as half-naked dress made of dollar bills. Thanks for trying to ruin my fave store, Miley!
Beyonce "honored" Trayvon Martin during her concert in Nashville - confirming, once again, that not only is she a racist, but that any "white" person who supports her in any way is a self-hating masochist.
Halle Berry finally got married after only about 2 years of dating and being engaged - Mazal Tov!
"Justin and Selena are back together and more in love than ever" - spare me, please!
And, finally, Kate's official due date passed with no baby so far. She went to her family's home supposedly to avoid the head in London - good luck, Kate!
Coffee this morning in my Harry Potter mug (the newer version).