MORNING UPDATE, October 17, 2012

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! The weather promises to be nice for this time of the year. 

Happy Rosh Chodesh Cheshvan! Ladies, please remind your spouses that they got another chance to give you Rosh Chodesh present and do the household chores (engaged men get to practice with gift-giving as well). According to CNN pole, Romney won another debate last night - Yahoo disagrees. Jo Rowling admitted that she does not like fantasy and sci-fi books - neither do I, her book being a rare exception. Victoria's Secret unveiled their latest million bucks lingerie set - let the salivating for both men and women begin! Ashton Kutcher is trending at #3 because of his public romance with Mila Kunis, while he is still technically married to Demi - oh, for effs sake! Why is this so bloody shocking? Most expensive zip code in the country still belongs to Manhattan - UES, naturally; go us! And the 3 highest paid women in entertainment: #3 - Taylor Swift; #2 - Britney Spears; and #1 - Oprah (which proves what a racist and female-hating country we are). And Gap chickened out and pulled their "Manifest Destiny" t-shirts, because the slogan is supposed to represent America's white supremacist tendencies - which, I am sure, was a big surprise to about 90% of American blacks who value history oh so damn much, never mind the American Destiny! It looks like Benny drunk milk from Chivas glass again - but this time it was a full-fat one. 

Coffee this morning in my green Yves Rocher mug.

MORNING UPDATE - DECEMBER 12

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather remains cold - still no flippies. Felines, however, adjusted a bit to the cold and are much more active. Sniff did his tail-puffing routine, and George did his treat-demanding routine.
The crazy upstairs is strangely quite; however, the new crazy did her screaming and cursing outside.
Both FB and Linkedin keep offering me to get connected to a bunch of people that I am desperately trying to avoid in real life; why would I want to connect with them in cyberspace?
Currently trending at #1 is Jenny McCarthy - because, according to someone named Julie Chen, Jenny "is not good for the View". Really?! I think she fits perfectly there, together with all the other uneducated and uninformed harpies. What really gets me going is seeing her books in Family and Childcare section - because I am old enough to remember her other book, with completely different cover, which would not be appropriate anywhere near children.
Trending at #10 are cashmere sweaters - very, very important subject, boys and girls, what can I say.
Kim Kardashian claims that she has "mixed feelings" about her latest bikini cover shot because she is so "critical" of herself - lady, please. You look even less smart once your mouth opens.
"Oprah and 'The Butler' got snubbed by the Globes" - by heart bleeds borsch.
Sriracha shortage continues - this is beginning to remind me of my childhood.
"Seattle police uncover stolen wine stash" - 2,500 bottles worth more than $650,000 were recovered. Who was robbed to begin with - Frasier Crane?
Kevin Federline is expecting his 6th child - where are social services when you need them?
"Justin Bieber May Face Interpol Arrest" - OK, let's not get overly dramatic here.
And, finally, Kate "recycled" yet another dress - listen, even Princesses have to stick to some kind of a budget (unlike, of course, our embarrassment of the First Lady).
Coffee this morning in my Disney Mini Bean Bag Plush mug with Mickey and Friends.

MORNING UPDATE - SEPTEMBER 23

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! Happy Third Day of Chol Hamoed Succot! The weather rocks - at least it does for me 
The cats were very vocal again this morning, and finally quieted down in their respective spots on my bed and in the cat house. George is extra annoying with his slightly unbalanced demands for food, and Sniff is emitting his battle cries a bit too much lately.
Mom's radio is on the fritz, so I loaned her mine - and now our mom is listening to Rush on Hello Kitty boombox. Do I rock or what?
According to the latest intelligence reports, there are young musicians on the streets of Moscow that are playing Vivaldi in order to collect money for Justin Bieber's assassination - Canadian friends, I think it's time to protect your national treasure and hide him somewhere where nobody will see or hear him.
Currently trending at #1 is Chris Brown - because he is officially tired of his "bad boy image". Well, hell, maybe if you behaved like a decent adult, you would not get that image?
Trending at #7 is Michael Douglas - because it looks like he "slammed" US prison system after "Emmy win". Dude, seriously, you need anti-psychotic meds more than your current wife, whom you oh so nobly abandoned!
Kim K. has a new "bestie" - Oprah. Oh, here is a match made in heaven! I mean, I know that Kim does not poses a huge amount of grey matter, but why does she keep hanging with such obvious racists?
"The ideal age for women to get married" - when they find a man who at least remotely resembles Darcy or Captain Wentworth.
"The best over the counter drugs" - the ones that work for you!
Will and Kate left Georgie with nanny in order to attend church - why is this news? Because they went to church or because they left the baby with his nanny? Or because they left the house together?
Coffee this morning in my Disney Mini Plush mug with the 7 Dwarfs.

MORNING UPDATE - AUGUST 15

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather rocks once again! It looks like a miracle will happen this year, and the Con Ed bill for August will be lower than the one for July. Cats, of course, are enjoying the weather to the fullest, especially Sniff - he is running around like crazy with his tail fluffed and altogether being a cute young kitty. George finally finished his pill course last night - by the last pill he got the whole process down pat. Both of them take periodic advantage of the open window in the kitchen. By the way, if you need a great person to take care of a slightly ailing cat, Baby Bro is your man!
Trending at #10: Cat DNA readings - I was curious as to what exactly can the DNA of my furry friends offer society, but this story is about a guy in Britain convicted of manslaughter because the DNA from the cat hair found on victim matched his pet. Scary and fascinating at the same time.
Jennifer Aniston "swapped" her usual black for a "flirty floral" - Jen, I could have sworn you were not hanging out in Brooklyn; why is black your signature color?
"Oprah Winfrey opens up about her man" - anything to gloss up the fact of falsely accusing a store clerk of racism. Good job, Oprah!
"Mama June picks her wedding dress" - "after trying on a few duds, (including a look-alike Kate Middleton gown), the reality star finds a winner." Spare me!
JC Penny is under attack for their back to school ad which, supposedly, promotes bullying of people who do not wear the "right" kind of clothes - it does not promote anything, just states the bleeding obvious - but then, I assume, truth usually hurts.
Lisa Kudrow just started trending at #1, but I can't see why - maybe because she gave some kind of an interview?
"Best places for rich and single" - what is this, gold-diggers of both sexes unite and conquer?
According to a new book by a political science professor, people who read all of HP 7 books "tend to be "more open to diversity; politically tolerant; less authoritarian; less likely to support the use of deadly force or torture; more politically active; and are more likely to have a negative view of the Bush administration." - really? Harry Potter is a tool that helps produce politically correct morons with Bush derangement syndrome? It think they arrived there despite the boy wizard.
Taylor Swift "hates" Justin Bieber, "feuding" with Selena Gomez - um, why the heck can't they just sing?!!!
And, finally, Kate, who is now staying with the baby by her mother, is considering a prolonged visit of about 6 months - wise move, lady!
Coffee this morning in my smiley faces mug.

MORNING UPDATE - AUGUST 9

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! The weather is not bad for NY August. Ladies, I hope you had a nice Rosh Chodesh, did not overburden yourselves with housework, and got presents from your husbands.
Sniff woke me up twice last night by headbutting my shoulders, licking my arms with his extra-rough tongues, and otherwise demanding attention. George just slept by my feet again.
Walk down Court Street brought back strange memories, but, as was alone, no cleansing ritual. Incidentally, shoppers at Trader Joe's in Manhattan are more fun than the ones in Brooklyn, but the food is still good.
Guess who is trending at #1 right now? Whitney Houston - because it looks like it would have been her 50th birthday. No comment.
Trending at #2 is Katherine Heigl, since she is planning to return to TV. I guess she got tired of starring in moronic and raunchy romantic comedies.
Trending at #9 is Scientology, since Leah Remini filed a missing person's report for their leader's wife, and they, in turn, issued a "scathing response" to it. And so the plot thickens.
Poor Oprah experienced a "racist incident" in Switzerland - aw, poor woman! My heart bleeds borsch for you! How does it feel to be on the receiving end?
Miley Cyrus "made a splash" in leather and mesh dress by attending her fiance's movie premiere - so, I guess, the engagement is still on.
Jennifer Hudson was "channeling 'Saved By The Bell'" in her "wacky" dress - as long as she stops yapping about Weight Watchers, I don't give a rat's patootie.
And, finally, New York Magazine re-assured its readers that Kate's official titles are indeed both the duchess and the princess - thanks, NY Mag!
Coffee this morning in my Disney Dalmatian Spots mug.