MORNING UPDATE - December 31

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! It's getting progressively cold - and the ship is till stuck in the ice.
Sniff decided that the suitcase is not that much fun and is now splitting his time between the pipe and the cat house. George, on the other hand, leaves the suitcase only to demand food.
Still waiting for my updated list from the GoodReads.
Men's Health has a whole instruction in five pictures on how to properly wash hands - because it looks like half the guys out there do not use soap. Gross, but not surprising.
Currently trending at #1 is Paleo diet - which supposedly dominated in 2013, and is "the healthiest diet" as it "mimics the diet of our cavemen ancestors." Gee, that sorta sounds familiar....BECAUSE Atkins claimed the same thing!
Trending at #3 is Catherine Zeta-Jones - because it looks like she is reunited with her hubby. Why?
Will heads back to school next year - he will be studying agriculture for 10 weeks; you can also find out how you can get a seat next to him in class.
"10 things you don't need to buy in 2014" - Obamacare not included.
Some people are trying to include cat food on their tax deduction - interesting move.
You can also purchase the bubble heads of the Supreme Court justices - well, as most of them are bubble heads in real life, I don't see the point of wasting money.
Coffee this morning in my huge Disney Pooh mug.

MORNING UPDATE - December 27

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! The weather is improving - at least for the next 2 or 3 days. Sniff is alternating between the cat house and his pipe in the bathroom. George is extremely annoyed about somebody moving his papasan and somebody else sleeping in it; his noise level increased tremendously in the morning.
At least 2 employees violated the microwave rules at work and warmed up fish in the microwave that has "no fish" sign on it.
According to Men's Health, 23% of men admitted to scarfing colleague's food from the work fridge - they obviously did not poll people at OU, where the number is something like 97%, and even our black security guard lost his ham sandwich a time or two.
Currently trending at #1 is Red Lobster closing - which fact at the present is not clear.
Trending at #2 is Tori Spelling - because she ignores the rumors about her husband's cheating; good luck to their kids. Incidentally, her husband is trending at #10.
"Was Andrew Johnson the worst U.S. president?" - hell, no. The worst president is now occupying the White House.
Game of Thrones was top pirated TV show - there is no accounting for tastes.
"NORAD releases Santa-tracking numbers" - 20 million people were tracking St. Nick!
Nikki Haley "bragged" on social media about Beretta PX4 Storm that she got from her hubby for christmas - I don't know which one of them rocks more.
And, finally, Us Magazine is offering all the details on Will and Kate's Boxing Day with Georgie.
Coffee this morning in my clear funky glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - December 26

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather is a bit strange, meaning it's very normal for December in our fair city.
Baby Bro gave the crazy upstairs a run for her money, which resulted in both cats hiding in my room. George simply run under the papasan and was observing from there; Sniff, on the other hand, climbed in the cat house and gave everyone the usual dirty looks. Good for your, kitty - don't show your fear!
Goodreads recently congratulated me on reading a whopping seven books in 2013!!!
According to Men's Health, 49% of guys pretended to be napping in order to avoid household chores - really?!! I would say the number is closer to something like 89%.
Currently trending at #1 is someone called Kellie Pickler - no idea who she is, but as she is trending because she "serenaded the troops in Afghanistan", good for her!
Just as an fyi, I stand with Phil is trending at #3 and Duck Dynasty is at #4.
Turks and Caicos are trending at #9 - just looking through my window begs a question as to why not #1?
JWoww is pregnant and looking forward to a lot of play dates with Aunt Snooki - poor kids.
And Hollywood Life is inviting you to peruse two stylish coast that Kate wore over the holiday - one of them being another "recycle".
Coffee this morning in my Disney Bean Bag plush mug with Mickey and Friends.

MORNING UPDATE - DECEMBER 17

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! It's snowing again! Global warming, my aching coccyx! Feline companions are, of course, snoozing away - George in the papasan, and Sniff in the cat house. For reasons unknown, they prefer to sleep in my room, even though it's the coldest spot in the place. 
Poor cats were deprived of their latest object of desire and affection, otherwise known as the latest huge Amazon box - it was finally emptied and recycled, and they don't even get to fight over an empty box.
The kid who hates her daycare was heard again today; ditto for the crazy upstairs, who resumed with extra vigor. The crazy outside, however, was not heard since Sunday - yippee?
Yesterday was both Beethoven's and Austen's birthdays - hurray for the dead white males and females and their beautiful and sublime art! Also, Julia Quinn pointed out that all women want Mr. Darcy, but men have no idea who that is. Gentlemen - got at least 2 copies of Pride and Prejudice you could borrow... oh, heck, what I am saying?!!
According to Men's Health, 58% of men "'forgotten' to pick up after their pooch" - and I bet you that at least half of them lives right here, in NY!
Currently trending at #1 is Denise Richards - because, according to her ex, Charlie Sheen, she is a "holiday humbug". OK, dude, you messed up, and your wife left you - way to be a classy gentleman in return.
"2 common light bulbs will be banned on January 1" - oh, what an enlightened times we live in!
Our dear government spent about 1 million USDs studying - ready for this?- romance in popular culture! On the bright side - that's one million that did not go to illegals or muslim terrorists.
Dennis Rodman is planning another visit to North Korea - can he stay there already?
Walmart is selling Occupy posters - good for Walmart!
And, finally, you can read about Kate and Will's new bulletproof Bentley - interesting, considering that England is one big "gun free" zone.
Coffee this morning in my huge Pooh mug.

MORNING UPDATE - DECEMBER 2

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! Happy Fifth Day of Chanukah! Wishing all of you a fantastic week!
The weather seems to be warming up. Kitties are warming up too - George complains more, and Sniff fights more often. Now, however, they are blissfully quite, with Sniff snoozing in the cat house next to me.
Speaking of cats - would like to institute Bring Your Pet To Work Day, as our floor seems to be home to a few mice. Would be really interesting to see the results.
Yesterday 2 barbarians from step-mama country were complaining about the lack of organic apples in the local fruit store. Was dearly tempted to offer them to go back to whence they came and grow their own very organic apples.
The latest issue of Men's Health has a very interesting article about health and psychological benefits of being grateful. Basically, simple mantra of "count your blessings" has a whole field of psychology growing out of it. But, of course, people who have faith are supposed to be backwards, dim, and uneducated.
Both Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones are flitting around the top ten currently trending because it looks like he wants to "woo" her back by any means necessary, even pancakes! Wasn't he the one who walked out on her? Plus, since when is she eating pancakes?!!
Jeff Bezos claims that he has a "futuristic" idea that will ensure the package delivery in 30 minutes or less - not if you partner with USPS, dude! Their futurist ideas seem to include the employment of tortoises.
Yet another holiday survival guide for singles, including the requisite picture of a woman with the cat! Seriously?!!! I would take my cats - or the cat pictured - over any guy I ever dated. Believe me, my holiday season is richer due in large parts to minimal amounts of male idiocy.
10 "savvy" end of year tax moves - number one would be getting rid of the IRS; that would definitely be "savvy"!
"Kris and Bruce speak out about split" - assuring their kids on camera that everything will be fine! No wonder their offspring is so touched in the head.
And, finally, Bieber went shirtless again - this time in Sidney; poor Aussies!
Coffee this morning in my funky clear glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - NOVEMBER 21

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather is simply great for a November day in NYC.
Sniff and George decided to be extra snugly today - and Sniff even proceed to lick my arm 
Somebody stole a bible yesterday - I wonder what kind of present it's going to make.
The latest issue of Men's Health is featuring a whole article on lip balms - please spare me these guys!
Currently trending at #1 is Ginnifer Goodwin - because she joins a long list of celebs who got pregnant recently. Seriously, who sprinkled what in their Evian ice cubes?
"Man's dog gets on Obamacare" - and so the circus continues.
And speaking of pets, a couple in Boston listed their feline companion as part of the family during 2010 census - after which the kitty was promptly called for jury duty. I was toying with an idea of listing our pets on the census and taking them to vote - well, I still got time before the next elections.
"Why Emimem went back to blond" - who gives a flying banana?
Wild turkeys invaded a neighbourhood in Staten Island - birds, watch out!
"Is (Kendall) Jenner romancing Taylor Swift's ex?" - interesting way to describe the situation.
A new Harvard study just found that people who eat nuts regularly live longer - well, duh!
Aussies don't really want to go to Bieber's concerts - hurray for peeps Down Under!
Kate "recycled" another outfit - another piece of breaking news delivered to us by HuffPo.
Coffee this morning in my Disney Mini Bean Bag Plush mug with Mickey and Friends.

MORNING UPDATE - NOVEMBER 6

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Wednesday! The weather is nice and mild for November. Sniff is also unusually mild. George is sitting on the windowsill in front of me and watching the leaves fall.
Congratulations to our fair city on electing a new mayor who represents the best that our worst have to offer - I wonder if in four years we would still be popular with tourists.
Speaking of mayors - Men's Health gave our esteemed Mayor Bloomberg some kind of health innovator award, and the latest issue of Glamour is featuring an interview with his daughter, in which she waxes poetical about the things she learned from her dear daddy. To paraphrase Forrest's mother, stupid is as stupid does.
The crazy upstairs started late yesterday, but made up for it in the noise and the length departments.
Currently trending at #2 is Vivien Leigh - who would have turned 100 just about now. A nice reminder of what a beautiful, talented, and classy actress looked like.
"What your pet is thinking" - if you really know the inner workings of the minds of my pets, I suggest you see a human doctor, usually referred to as "psychiatrist".
Lady Gaga splits with her long-time manager - my heart bleeds borsch for both of them.
"Red carpet looks Swift loves and regrets the most" - oh, give me a break! She is young and extremely photogenic - so the males of the species gobble it all up; and females usually get blinded by the red carpet itself.
LA customs agents found a motorcycle that was stolen in 1967 - my confidence in our law enforcement just skyrocketed.
New trend in wedding gowns - a bikini; still white or off- white, decorated, beaded, embroidered - you name it; plus - the requisite veil! Would be really interesting to show to grandkiddies.
"Justin Bieber Releases Movie Poster for His Fragrance 'The Key'" - I wonder if the brothel sheet is present in that poster.
Coffee this morning in my striped glass from Target.

MORNING UPDATE - NOVEMBER 1

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Friday! Happy Erev Shabat! It's a first day of November - so it's cloudy and rainy, but still pretty warm.
Kitties are sleeping on their self-designated beds - George on mine and Sniff on Baby Bro's. This morning they probably heard my alarm as they both showed up the minute I got up.
Still waiting for the tea kettle to arrive.
Ina is showing how to set up cocktail table - and she is offering to make only 3 snacks to go with the cocktails! And this is how you recognize an off-the-derech-Jew! 3 snacks! Oy vey!
Men's Health had a whole article dedicated to scientific explanations of why men are so fascinated with breasts - and concluded with anatomic explanation of why Kate Upton's breasts "jiggle". I am sure the subject is paramount to, well, men's health.
Currently trending at #2 is Demi Moore - because her divorce from Ashton may be "finalized soon". Took them long enough, that's for sure.
Trending at #3 is Obama's approval - which "hits all time low". No joke, Sherlock!
Trending at #7: Honey Boo Boo - because her family dressed up as "Kardashian/Jenner clan" for Halloween. Man, I really don't know which picture is more terrifying: the real Kardashian/Jenner family, the real Honey Boo Boo family, or either of them dressed like the other.
Guy Fieri is also trending somewhere in the top ten - because he got into a "nasty fight" with a hairstylist. Well, I wonder why - not enough hair gel?
"How bad are things between Kate and Jon?" - who gives a flying banana?
"Faster, cheaper ways to clean the bathroom" - if you want fast, you hire a cleaning help - but it won't be cheap; if you want cheaper, you do it yourself - and it won't be faster.
"Texas man arrested for overdue library book" - wow! And I thought our libraries sucked.
"How unhappy couples text" - we do live in some strange times.
"Bieber debuts graffiti art" - the dude is definitely multi-talented, what can I say.
Coffee this morning in a Styrofoam cup from the bagel shop next to the laundry that only had ESPN on today.

MORNING UPDATE - OCTOBER 22

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! The weather still rocks! The feline companions are a bit on the sleepy side this morning - George is on my bed again, and Sniff is on Baby Bro's chair. 
Sign of growing up in a hungry country - a visit to the supermarket is always an enjoyable pastime! Plus, kitties decided to help in the unpacking by sniffing everything, chewing on the bags, jumping in the pantry, etc.
Continuing to read the fascinating study in the Men's Health. Apparently, Greek men get it the most because "they don't hesitate to pursue committed women for flings" - fine morals these people have, what can I say.
Not trending at #1, but at measly #3 - Kim and Kanye are engaged!!! Aw, Mazal Tov! Also found out that they are called Kimye - how cute!!!
Another list of foods (this time only 5) on which I am supposed to "splurge" because they taste better organic; this list alone makes it interesting: chicken, olive oil, butter, olives, and eggs - oh, what I wouldn't give in order to make these gurus live the way I did as a kid for about one year! Everything would taste like manna to them after it, especially the items on their idiotic list!!
Kate Upton "revealed" that when she was growing up, she wanted to be either a zookeeper or a CIA agent - interesting; I can totally see her as sort of Mata Hari; after all, plenty of men go stupid about her.
An alligator who was "just chilling" decided to visit Wallmart - even the animals feel the economic pinch! The poor gator was also forced to check cheep items!
"Potential hair loss remedy" - accept it, shave your head, and move on, for pete's sake!
Ted Danson is currently trending at #8 because "He will always be Sam Malone, even to himself" - well, duh!!
There are also NFL news galore, due to, I guess, football season - but, being a complete ignoramus in this, I am skipping all the gossip and honorable mentions.
According to USA TODAY, "Justin Bieber, Lady Gaga, One Direction, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, Miley Cyrus and One Direction will tussle for top honors at the first-ever YouTube Music Awards show" - to quote one of my all time fave movies, their tunes "have no musical merit whatsoever", so, what's with all this brouhaha?
And, finally, it looks like Harry's romance with his current girlfriend is getting serious as she was invited to Georgie's christening - just think what another royal engagement will provide in terms of circuses to the masses!
Coffee this morning in my Disney Dalmatian Spots mug.

MORNING UPDATE - OCTOBER 21

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Monday! Shavua Tov! Wishing all of you a fantastic week! The weather rocks once again - yay!
Our house Democrat, otherwise known as Sniff, destroyed another household item - this time he chewed off the cord of our toaster oven; fortunately, the toaster was old, plus, we got another one. After his usual session of eating, running, eating some more, running some more, he is now resting from his hard labors in Baby Bro's room. George, after his also usual morning routine of whining, eating, and whining some more, is now sleeping on my bed.
Emergency tea kettle is out of commission, which necessitates the emergency purchase of a new one.
According to the survey in Men's Health, American women want to be complimented on their eyes and smiles, the Latin American women want to be complimented on their behinds, and Russian women want to be complimented on their outfits - interesting cultural differences.
Currently trending at #1 - once again, drum roll please - no, not Kim; this time it's her sister Kourtney! She announced "a new fashion endeavor"! Here is an oxymoron for you - Kardashians and fashion.
Trending at #7 is Ted Danson - because, among other things, he was talking about his "close friendship" with Bill and Hilary Clinton. Dude, for shame!
"Arsenio Hall recalls falling-out with Oprah" - racist fight!
"Diet tips from around the Globe" - you want me to sum it up? Eat a variety and enjoy! It's food! Your body needs it!
Chevy Camaro "returns with gusto" - considering the current state of GM, never mind the present EPA standards, I somehow question the "gusto".
"What to do with your Social Security raise" - survive?!!!
One of Bieber's fans reportedly spent 100 grand in order to look like his idol - paging people in white coats with straight jackets!
Kate Upton and Maksim Chmerkovskiy "finally" confirmed "their romantic pairing" - I don't know if more male or female hearts would be broken; my money is on the males.
And, finally, Kate's fave maternity designer shared "pregnancy fashion tips" - the tips did not include the suggestions on how to deal with the moronic sales personnel you so often encounter those days due to affirmative actions hiring guidelines.
Coffee this morning in my huge Disney Pooh and Friends cup.

MORNING UPDATE - OCTOBER 15

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Tuesday! The weather still rocks - hurray for fall! George and Sniff both take turns trying to run into the hall - but any and all noises over there make them run back immediately. 
The crazy upstairs is up to her usual stuff - and today she is joined by a whole slew of other people, drilling, and banging.
According to Men's Health, the color of jeans can tell a lot about a guy's character, as well as his shoes - need to put this in use on the next people-watching expedition to the Park.
Currently trending at #1 - drum roll please - is none other than Kim Kardashian! She "revealed her secrets" to post-baby weigh loss!!! Profound and life-altering topic it is, indeed!
Mazal Tov to Ivanka Trump! It's a boy! Congrats to Donald on his 5th grandkid! Hopefully, that will promote him to work on a better hairdo. Also wondering if Ivanka got her own weight loss secrets up her sleeve, of if she would follow Kim's advice.
Sandra Oh is leaving Grey's Anatomy - sniff, sniff! Just the other day I accidentally discovered that that soap is still on - which made me wonder, once again, at the general mental abilities of the TV viewers.
Some kind of young British singer "recycled" Beyonce's dress - who said Beyonce had a copyright on wearing the said dress?
"30 of the Smartest Celebrities in Hollywood" - here is an oxymoron of the week for you, ladies and gents!
The latest victim of the government shutdown - the White House kitchen garden! It is being attacked by squirrels because the funding is shut for the human tenders. Aw, poor parteigenosse Michelle - my heart bleeds borsch for her and her beloved garden!
"7 ways to meet more dates" - I am trying to avoid them, thank you very much!
And, finally, "Justin Bieber Spouts a Manly Mustache" - it will take sooooo much more for him to appear manly, I can't begin to enumerate it.
Coffee this morning in my Coffee Bean/Tea Leaf mug.