MORNING UPDATE - OCTOBER 3

Good Morning, peeps! Happy Thursday! The weather is a bit iffy, but not bad for an early October.
Woke up yesterday with scratches on my foot; both George and Sniff were questioned, but neither admitted to the deed. George is enjoying both his new Amazon boxes: the humongous one and the tiny one. Sniff is racing around the apartment. Earlier he decided to play mashgiach again and supervise the bathroom cleaning; hence he was locked up for his trouble.
According to Men's Health, red apples are the best for your health. Dudes, if I eat an apple at all, it's already an achievement; plus, I don't like red apples, period, so, leave me alone with your statistical data.
In the same august publication was a whole set of instructions on buying a bra for a girlfriend - because that's what we really, really want to get as a gift: underwear!
The country survived another day of the government shutdown with poor parteigenosse Michelle announcing that due to it her Twitter account would not really be updated - aw, cry me a river!
Currently trending at #6 is Chelsea Handler - because she split up with her boyfriend and also because she showed off "bikini body". The public wants to know if these incidents are related, and if yes, what was the cause and what was the effect? You can't just report something like this without further explanations!!
"What Kate Gosselin did with all her money" - does anyone really want to know?
A lot of brides would like to marry on 11/12/13 - I assume because getting married on a specific silly date is a guaranteed foundation for a happy and solid marriage. But, hey, the wedding goods purveyors are happy, at least.
George Clooney "revealed" that he had to wear Spanks for his latest movie - please get that picture out of my head.
Britney Spears "found it tough to play 'sexy' now" - because she is a mother. Congratulations on maturing, Britney!
The world's most expensive car costs only 52 mil - what kind of a whopper of the midlife crisis do you have to hit in order to get this one?!!
And, finally, Bieber announced that he will release a new song each Monday for the 10 consecutive weeks - just when you thought Mondays can't suck more than they do already.
Coffee this morning in my Aruba mug.